WELCOME TO THE OFFICIAL RICHARD E GERSTEIN JUSTICE BUILDING BLOG. THIS BLOG IS DEDICATED TO JUSTICE BUILDING RUMOR, HUMOR, AND A DISCUSSION ABOUT AND BETWEEN THE JUDGES, LAWYERS AND THE DEDICATED SUPPORT STAFF, CLERKS, COURT REPORTERS, AND CORRECTIONAL OFFICERS WHO LABOR IN THE WORLD OF MIAMI'S CRIMINAL JUSTICE. POST YOUR COMMENTS, OR SEND RUMPOLE A PRIVATE EMAIL AT HOWARDROARK21@GMAIL.COM. Winner of the prestigious Cushing Left Anterior Descending Artery Award.

Thursday, April 16, 2020

THE CAMEL'S NOSE UNDER THE TENT

The following post has NOT been approved for distribution by the Motion Picture Association of America. 

Very slowly... a circumspect email here, a private text there, a hushed phone call with a figure in a black robe huddled in a corner, hand over mouth, eyes darting back and forth, there are discussions about how to reopen the courts. Shhsh...it's a secret, so don't talk about it too loudly. 

When do court calendars get back to normal with State, PDs, RC3s, and private counsel all jockeying for position to call the next case whilst remaining six feet apart? 
Will we have X's on the floor of the courtrooms, six feet apart, for lawyers and litigants to stand like they do in the checkout line at Costco, Winn Dixie and Starbucks (you can sometimes find Rumpole early in the morning at the SB in the Bond At Brickell for an early morning tall Americano, one pump caramel). 
Will a sidebar now require everyone to leave the courtroom while the participants talk about things that cannot be on the record, like "Can you believe her shoes with that purse?" 

What about jurors? How many in the box? How many will show up for service after being out of work for months? 

And then there's this: "You honor may I approach the witness?"
Witness: "Not unless she's wearing a mask!" 

And of course identification cases will be a bit more difficult: 
Prosecutor: Can you identify the mask the defendant was wearing? 
Witness: "Sure, it was a Snoopy mask, the one where he is on his dog house with goggles on fighting the Red Barron."
Prosecutor: "And were the gloves blue or white?" 

Depo rooms, tiny to begin with, are now out of the question. On the other hand, the Marlins and the Dolphins have stadiums that will not be used much for the next year. State v. Sanchez depos on the 20, State v. Gomez on the 30, and going for the TD, the oral argument in Wilson v. State will be at the goal-line. Meanwhile, in  civil court  Seaver v. Rose notice of depos will be for second base, Marlins Stadium, first question after the national anthem at 1:05 pm. "Get your hot dogs, cold beer! Case law on summary judgements here.

Prediction: As soon as everyone gets familiar with Zoom, courts will reopen. 

Imagine a rolly-polly Brown bear, hibernating for the winter, emerging from his cave, eyes blinking at the unfamiliar bright spring sunshine, a bit confused about where to go and what to do. That could be your favorite judge, sequestered in their lair for six weeks, nose pressed up against the window, no world walking by to watch. But they will yawn, stretch, and get into their car, roll into the courthouse late, ask their bailiff to grab them a coffee while they wander on to the bench, and start denying motions to suppress before reading them. Then all will be right with the world. At least our corner of it. 

6 comments:

Covid Cutie said...

I want to reply to the rude comments about me yesterday.
1) I am NOT looking to get married or have children
2) I am very set financially because of my generous family
3) I am young and single and bored (who isn't bored who is young and single?)
4) Dating apps suck
5) So I thought I would have some fun and post on Rumpole's site- mostly tongue-in-cheek-but who knows?
6) The person who attacked me- it is so transparent that is YOUR life story, you loser. Stuck in a bad second marriage after being taken by your first wife for child support and alimony. That is NOT my story, nor will it be my story. So sorry for you. Go back to XTube.

Anonymous said...

I'm loving this Covid hottie. She fights back.

Anonymous said...

Can we get a pic?

Anonymous said...

I just realized that Trump is like Howard Beele. Love him or hate him, we watch so we can see/ hear what the next thing he is going to say is.

Sir Wilfred

Anonymous said...

Dear CoVid Cutie,
Did you make your money in the financial markets or services before you became an Attorney?
As David Lee Roth said" I'm just a gigolo..."

Anonymous said...

Nothing better than an angry yoga teacher...not.