HAPPY BIRTHDAY HARRY POTTER

 July 31 is a good day to have a birthday. 

RULES OF STYLE

 We write a lot, no surprise, and here are some stylistic issues on our mind. 

PAST TENSE OF PLEA

 We follow Gegorgia State Court of Appeals Judge @JudgeDillard on Twitter for no other reason than he seems like a really nice guy dedicated to his job. He loves his clerks; loves nurturing his interns, and this past year went on an amazing health journey that he honestly tweeted for the world to see. He is humble and smart and not pretentious- three qualities that would disqualify him for a seat on the bench in South Florida (obligatory Rumpolian cheap shot at the Miami Judiciary. No respite even on the lord’s day of rest. Sorry).

But then we had a serious disagreement with his honor Judge Dillard. He tweeted that the past tense of PLED WAS PLEADED and we respectfully objected in a tweet back, arguing that it was PLED.

You bleed, you bled- you didn’t bleeded.

You Plead, you Pled. Upon receiving a misbegotten alias capias command to appear in court, we might fire off an email like this: “Dear Judge, this case is closed. My client pled last week” as opposed to “my client pleaded last week” 

Pleaded is awkward. Consider this our continuing objection your honor. When appearing before you, we shall endeavor to follow your rules of language (however wrong they may be). 

Of course, this is somewhat unneeded for us, since our rule is never plead anything but not guilty.

 

QUOTATION CONUNDRUM

When using a quote, the rule is to add a period inside the quotation even if the portion doesn’t have one if the quotation ends the sentence. For example you might write in an email to your favourite judge “Rumpole said you were a simpleton.”

And note there is no additional period outside of the quotation mark.

BUT (or as they say in the hallowed halls of rhe REGJB) PERO...

We think the rule also is that if the sentence is followed by a citation, then no period is used. For example:

“Rumpole said you were a simpleton”.  Justice Building Blog, December 2, 2013.   

Thoughts on the stylistic issues of the day? 

PINE TAR

 There's a whole lot of things to love about baseball, including this famous contretemps forty years ago this week. Enjoy. 

FLORIDA'S EDUCATION EXCELLENCE

Florida has revamped the old (and liberal) way of looking at various historical events. For example, Florida children will be taught that slavery was beneficial to slaves in several ways. We could not make this up if we tried. Click here if you do not believe us. 

Because we live to help, here is a suggested curriculum with topics for Florida tykes hungry to learn. 

I) SLAVERY- Beneficial to everyone! 

Many slaves enjoyed a wonderful relationship with the owners of the plantation they worked on. Some were brought into the Main House and participated (by serving) in family traditions like Christmas dinner, birthdays and holidays and the slaves were looked on by their owners as members of the family. Many slaves were able to take leftover food to their own families! 

Slaves, who had been transported from Africa, also enjoyed additional benefits like: 1) A free ocean voyage; 2) training in vocations like picking cotton; 3) free housing on a southern plantation. 

All in all the owner/slave relationship was a mutually rewarding experience for many of the participants in this great American experiment. These days, many black Americans can look at pride upon southern towns and plantations knowing their ancestors played an important part in the building America (and graciously did so without being paid!). 

II) THE HOLOCAUST- a wonderful get-together. 

The Holocaust gets a bad rap. Florida Children will learn that many Jews preferred to live together and in the construction of "labor villages" ,Jews and Gypsies were able to live and work in peace  amongst their own kind, with many benefits including 1) ZERO unemployment- every Jew and Gypsie worked every day; 2) A healthy meal - many Jews arrived at the labor villages overweight. Germany helped them lose weight and become productive members of society; 3) Cutting edge medical care by Dr. Joseph Mengele- a renowned German physicians who had many innovative ideas about health care;  4) Protection from Russian pogroms- Jews in the labor villages were protected from the Russians. 

All in all, many Jews emerged from their time in German labor villages with memories that they would never forget. And with the popular trend these days of people enjoying tattoos, all Jews were tattooed in German labor villages at NO COST TO THEM. Just one of many benefits Jews and Gypsies enjoyed for free during their stay at the labor villages.  

Rumpole says: Does this frighten you? A governmental effort to teach Florida children that slavery had benefits? It should.  Let any person who seriously advances this idea become a slave for a year; be whipped; see their children sold and their wife raped, and then report back about the benefits of slavery.  Trying to teach that slavery had some benefits for the slave is like saying Oswald deserves some credit for shooting JFK in the head so he wouldn't suffer. 

It is madness. 

Now you know why we are leaving Florida and the United States? This is part of the reason why.  

CAN THE SAO DO BETTER ?

The Miami-Dade State Attorneys Office has a wee  problem...which I cannot believe has not  been the subject of contention and criticism. Their telephone situation leaves a lot to be desired. 

I have pride in having a resume that includes being a former Miami-Dade prosecutor. In my decades of having cases against that office, and comparing them with other district attorneys offices, the Miami-Dade County State Attorneys  is way, way  up there. From the top to bottom, it's an upper-echelon office that has produced an array of excellent professionals and there are also plenty of current employees deserving of accolades. However, their telephone situation doesn't correlate to the legal, administrative and people skills that I have given complements to. Frankly, it's not that good; in more technical terms... IT STINKS!

After lunch,  I would say you only have a 50/50 chance of a human being answering.  So many times you just get a recording. Even if you get somebody to answer at the switchboard, you will still most likely, get directed to a filled up, not- able-to-receive-messages voicemail. It is common for ASAs to not update their own voicemail leaving the caller uncertain if the messages are going to the proper persons. Even if you are fortunate to get through the switchboard,  it is not uncommon for the ASAs to not be in proximity to the people answering the phones resulting in the answerer not being knowledgeable enough to take your message. How many times do I spin my wheels giving the secretary all of their requested information  so that they can respond with "that person is not here"? I don't know if many of the staff members are working remotely but sometimes their telephone system sounds like two tin cans attached by a string.  COVID was from 2020 yet we are inching towards 2024; it's enough already, let's get back to business...normal business!

To all the ASAs that have called me from your cell phone, I view that as a "one shot deal" and not an invitation to regularly call you on that phone. You know, I respect your privacy but, I need to get in touch with you.

To the judges that may read this, this a bona-fide problem that absolutely impacts the administration of justice. To be a high volume defense attorney,  you take a lot of time to make calls in an effort to resolve cases, clarify legal issues and make progress for the clientele...but this telephone issue is an insurmountable obstacle. Some of you judges like to micro-manage, so why are you not concerned about this?  Communications among parties is vital but, in certain regards,  it has definitely become rather elusive. If this debacle was caused by budgetary issues, high turnover rate, etc...so what...you're still one of the largest district attorneys offices around. Your switchboard and secretaries are the first line of interaction with the public meaning regular and attainable communications should be a priority. If you ran a private business like this... you'd be out of business! 

The following may be considered offensive, or even fighting words, Broward blows Miami-Dade out of the water...at least with the ability to call their office. Miami-Dade, think about that...Broward has one-upped you!  This concept may use to be inconceivable ...but not any more.

So, Miami-Dade States Attorneys Office, reaching back to my youth when one of my parents would be in the shower, heard a ring but knew others were in the house... ANSWER THE DAMN PHONE!  

MIAMI DADE POLICE DIRECTOR FREDDY RAMIREZ SHOOTS HIMSELF

 The Miami Herald / Chuck Rabin broke the story this morning around 2 am that Miami Dade Police Director Freddy Ramirez shot himself early this morning while driving back from Tampa. There is no firm report on his condition other than he is in the hospital. 

Here is the Herald Article. 

You can also follow developments on Twitter ( soon to become X, but that's a story for another time) with @chuckrabin and @davidovalle305 (because you can take the reporter out of Miami but not the Miami out of the reporter). 

This is a breaking story and we will update as needed. 

SUMMER HIATUS

 

Talk amongst yourselves. 

Check this space frequently, as always, for special guest bloggers! 

Not saying who, but let's just say certain former presidents do more in the summer than release their reading and playlists....

TOUGH ON CRIME AND CHARACTER

 In 1968, candidate Richard Milhous Nixon, in his second bid for the presidency, came up with two strategies. First, he conceived of the Republican "southern strategy", betting that the Southern states of Florida, Georgia, Mississippi, Alabama, Louisiana, and Texas, to name a few, that were dominated by southern-dixiecrat Senators, would be willing to cross party and vote for a Republican presidential candidate. He also highlighted the Republican "tough on crime" strategy. The two strategies, novel at the time, would send Nixon, Reagan, Bush, Bush, and Trump to the White House and would become the de facto strategies for Republican presidential candidates. 

From Nixon's 1968 acceptance speech at the Republican National Convention: 

The choice we make in 1968 will determine not only the future of America but the future of peace and freedom in the world for the last third of the Twentieth Century.
And the question that we answer tonight: can America meet this great challenge?
For a few moments, let us look at America, let us listen to America to find the answer to that question.
As we look at America, we see cities enveloped in smoke and flame.
We hear sirens in the night.
We see Americans dying on distant battlefields abroad.
We see Americans hating each other; fighting each other; killing each other at home.
And as we see and hear these things, millions of Americans cry out in anguish.
Did we come all this way for this?
Did American boys die in Normandy, and Korea, and in Valley Forge for this?
Listen to the answer to those questions.
It is another voice. It is the quiet voice in the tumult and the shouting.
It is the voice of the great majority of Americans, the forgotten Americans—the non-shouters; the non-demonstrators.
They are not racists or sick; they are not guilty of the crime that plagues the land.

So when did Republicans turn away from being the party of law and order and start applauding in ecstasy when their indicted presidential candidate calls for defunding the FBI, wants to politicalize the Justice Department, calls a special prosecutor "sick and demented" and now, as reported by the Wall Street Journal here, is facing a second federal criminal indictment? 

Why do a majority of Republican voters support a candidate that lies, brags about grabbing women in their private parts, was found civilly liable for sexually assaulting a woman, incited the riot of the Capital- for which he is about to be indicted for, and is currently under indictment for stealing national security top secret documents? 

Just what it is about a misogynist. lying loser who never wins anything ( we cannot think of one court case he has won in the last five years), and who constantly fires and belittles the people he hires (after bragging about only hiring the best people), that causes people to say "yeah, this is the best guy I can think of to be president?" 

Remember guaranteeing that Mexico would pay for a wall on the border? The US built 42 miles of wall on the border, and we will give anyone one million dollars who can prove to us in public that Mexico paid for the wall. 

So can someone explain to us why Americans are supporting a lying loser criminal rapist? Because for the life of us, we cannot understand how the party of Lincoln, Teddy Roosevelt. Eisenhower, Nixon, Reagan, Bush and John McCain could support this cretin. 

OUR GREATEST JOURNEY

 54 years ago, on July 16, 1969, Mankind (to use the lingo of the time) began its greatest journey.  Apollo 11, with three Americans on board, lifted up from Cape Kennedy in Florida to land two Americans on another celestial body- the moon.

The Apollo program, and the moon landing, was our greatest journey, and arguably our greatest hour. Perhaps America and the world recached the apex of humanity's achievement in July 1969. 

What has happened since we landed on the moon? 

We have been to war multiple times; experienced genocide on multiple continents in numerous countries; we have brought our planet to the edge of an ecological disaster, while a significant number of Americans have accepted the lies and propaganda that global warming is fake. We have rioted in our streets, shot at each other in the name of justice, and watch countless children shot and murdered simply because they went to school that morning. 

We have none of the can-do spirit that united a nation behind the dream and leadership of a young president who was murdered in office. One can only now think that if the prevailing attitudes of politics existed in the 1960s, then the opposing political party would have done all it could do to stop the moon landing, just so a martyred president and his party could not claim credit for the accomplishment. 

We do not live in a time when people believe they are Americans first, and then a member of their political party second. We live in a time when many people fervently believe that they would rather see the nation fail, then allow a political opponent succeed.  And so we suffer with children being murdered and the world overheating. 

And yet...

We are made of better stuff. We still have in our collective genes the ability of overcoming anything against any odds.  We did it during Washington's winter camp at Valley Forge; we did it at the battle of Belleau Wood in France in June, 1918; We did it in the battle of Midway in 1942, in the  Ardennes Forest in December 1944 and at Iwo Jima in February and March 1945. Americans, sometimes just a few, stood up to danger and tyranny and turned the tide. 

  We created computers, and silicon chips and Silicon Valley.  We digitized our collective knowledge and, in some ways, our collective consciousness. We fought AIDS down to a manageable medical condition, and later created the COVID vaccines that corralled the virus. 

Maybe July 1969 was humanity's finest hour. 

And maybe it wasn't. Maybe when the story of our small blue planet is written with a conclusion, maybe July 1969 is just one of many wonderous moments. We choose to believe that there are many more to come. 

But for today, let's remember this moment and rejoice that we could do this. That three brave men, with a nation behind them, could travel to the moon and that two of them could land on another celestial body and proudly declare "We Came In Peace For All Mankind". 

SOMETHING SMELLS

 Judge Michael Ponsor is a US District Court Judge in Massachusetts. He is now on senior status. 

Here is his Op Ed in the NY Times on the odor emanating from the penumbra of the US Supreme Court. 

It's not a pleasant smell. His recounting of a few incidents in his career reminded us that we were recently thinking about what certain Judges in the SDFL would do if offered free luxury vacations and other swag that the current batch of Supreme Court Justices are scooping up the way Ozzie did a hot grounder to short. 

We think our bench would do the right thing.   No Hedge funded vacays to Bali for our judges. In the (very rare)  times we have socialized with the members of the federal bench it was never an issue, everyone paid their own way. 

But as Judge Ponsor, who knows a thing or two about turning a good phrase, "The road to perdition is paved with a free cup of coffee." 

For those Maga-DeSantis thirty something judges who populate our courthouse and think judicial genius starts with denying as many motions to suppress as possible, this essay is worth a read on what it really means to be a Judge. 

NY Times Op Ed: Does The Supreme Court Realize How Bad It Smells?

IT'S NOT THE HEAT

 Actually it is the heat. Other than being a Republican and/or a Federalist Society member, the rest of the world knows that July 4, 2023 was the hottest day in the last 100,000 years. 

Remember back in 2000-2010 when all the Republicans were saying global warming was a liberal democratic hoax and were ecstatic chanting "drill baby drill" in public? What do you morons say now?  

So let us once again get on our soap box and ask WHY DO MALE LAWYERS HAVE TO WEAR A SUIT  JACKET IN COURT IN JULY AND AUGUST? 

Not that we are an Equal Protection expert, but if female or non-binary lawyers (note the historic event of Rumpole using in public for the very first time the term non-binary) were required to wear some oppressive piece of clothing, wouldn't there be an outcry and lawsuits? 

What could actually happen if a male lawyer showed up in court in just a shirt and tie sans jacket? 

Judge: Good morning counsel. And nice to see you're wearing a full suit and tie today. 

Lawyer: It's 99 degrees in Miami with 500% humidity (under his breath- But I know since you were appointed by DeSantis and are a federalist society member you cannot acknowledge the science of global warming without destroying your career.)  

Judge: What was that last part? 

Lawyer: I said glad to be here judge, in my suit and tie. 

Judge: That's correct. If you weren't wearing a suit jacket on this day when it was 99 degrees outside, the fair administration of justice would come grinding to a halt. 

Lawyer: That's right judge. If I wasn't wearing a suit jacket we might return to Plessy v. Ferguson, and no one wants that. 

Judge: Umm, what's the cite on that counsel? It's not ringing a bell for me. 

Lawyer: Never mind judge, no one wants to return to Plessy v. Ferguson anyway. Well, maybe Justices Thomas and Alito, but for now we are safe. 

Judge: Well, I'll consult my handy Federalist Society handbook and see what my position is on that. 

Rumpole says, this whole federalist society thing is getting under our skin. Especially when judges who have zero training in philosophy prostrate themselves before the federalist society just to get their endorsement. 

We hereby challenge any judge to a (semi) live/public debate on the philosophy of the federalist society.  And because it won't be pretty or close, we will give you a hint and tell you to make sure you understand (or at least have a wiki definition handy) of the terms Metaphysics and Epistemology. This will at least keep you in the game for the first five minutes. 

We're a fair blogger, but take caution: this heat is making us f'ing crazy: 

JUDGE A. LEO ADDERLY HAS PASSED AWAY .......

THE CAPTAIN REPORTS:

WE MOURN THE PASSING OF JUDGE A. LEO ADDERLY .....

There was a time not too long ago when you could count on one hand the number of judges in Miami-Dade County that were African American.  The "first" to hold that honor was Judge Lawson Thomas, appointed to the City of Miami Black Municipal Court in 1950.  Judge Wilkie Ferguson was our "first" African American judge on the Circuit Court in 1977. Judge Ferguson also became the "first" on the 3rd DCA in 1980. Judge Calvin Mapp was "first" on the County Court bench in 1973.  

I remember well Judge Leo Adderly. He was sitting on the County Court bench when I first began practicing law in the 1980s.  I cannot ever recall Judge Adderly raising his voice.  He always had a calm demeanor, he was in fact soft-spoken and he treated everyone that appeared before him with respect. 

Our Justice Building Blog family joins family members and friends in mourning the passing of Retired Judge Alfonso Leo Adderly on July 3, 2023.

Judge Adderly, a recipient of the Miami Herald Silver Knight Award, obtained his undergraduate degree from Morehouse College, and his law degree from Indiana University, Howard University School of Law. He served as a Miami-Dade County Judge from September 1981 to August 31, 2003.

Prior to his appointment to the County Court Bench, he was in private general practice and also served as a Miami-Dade Assistant Public Defender from 1969 to 1972.

Beyond his service on the Bench, Judge Adderly made significant contributions to his community. He was among the first group of nine attorneys to serve as Legal Services of Greater Miami staff attorneys in 1966 and later served as Board President. Together with Dorothy Ellen Jenkins Fields, he founded the Black Archives, History and Research Foundation of South Florida.

Services

A viewing will be held from 3:00 PM to 7:00 PM on Friday, July 14, 2023, at Range Funeral Home, 5727 NW 17th Ave, Miami, FL 33142.

The funeral service for Judge Adderly will take place at 11:00 AM on Saturday, July 15, 2023, at Church of the Incarnation, 1835 NW 54th St. Miami, FL 33142.

I hope that some of our older attorneys that read the Blog will share their good memories of Judge Adderly.

CAPTAIN OUT .......
Captain4Justice@gmail.com

LAWYERS NEEDED IN NYC

 NYC. The Big Apple. 

Crime is rampant. 

Lawyers needed. 

First up- never ignore a man with a bike lock. 

KEEP SCROLLING DOWN

TOLD YA

 There's a new mixer in the works. 

You should go. 

Here's the flyer. 

Guess what caught our eye...

Any guess as to what we immediately noticed? 

You guessed it!!

Enjoy the weekend. 

HAPPY BLOG BIRTHDAY SDFL

 His was the first South Florida legal blog, and the best (federal) legal blog around. Happy Birthday to SDFL blog and its creator David Markus!  

We owe a debt to Mr. Markus and his blog.  Many years ago, before Twitter and Snap-Tok, and Intergram, in a day when flip phones were cool, we saw two blogs, one out of NYC and DOM's.  One gloomy afternoon, while whiling the hours away in our office, staring out the window waiting for inspiration to hit us on a nicer way to tell the 3rd DCA that the trial judge was a  dofus   (edited for inappropriate content), we thought "why not?" and blog legal history was made in South Florida. 

But David was first, and he paved the way, and for that he deserves all the accolades. 

 Of course, our blogs are fundamentally different. David puts his name on his blog, which requires him to be more circumspect in his coverage of judges and issues. Like all of us, he is bound by codes of professional ethics and responsibility that doesn't allow for lawyers to say what they really think about the wearer of the black robe. And...and don't underestimate this- David has to go to court and practice before the same judges in the courts he is blogging about. So naturally his blog covers the federal legal community in ways much different than we do- which is at the fringes of decency, and in the safety of opaqueness.  

We've had our differences over the years. 

We don't agree on the historical and formal language of pleadings. We are formal. Proper. Reserved. We like "Comes Now" and DOM- a Gen Ex-er with all their informality, is progressing towards "Hey Judge!...". 

But (and as Bruce Springsteen sings in his live performance of Tenth Avenue Freeze Out -"This here is the important part!")-  we all know that you can do no better * than hiring Mr. Markus and Ms. Moss, and their team when scurrilous accusations are hurled your way. 

SO, HAPPY BIRTHDAY SDFL BLOG.  Thank you for leading the way. 

* Not including the author of this blog

THE SUPREME SUPREME COURT

UPDATE: In our continuing effort to stay on top of the most important news from the Big Apple 🍎, comes this startling report: 

Six unelected people, cloistered away from the public, with lifetime tenure and physical protection have in a space of a few days upended American Society. 

The Supreme Court just

1) Held that being of color in the US is no big deal. There are no disadvantages to being black or any other minority such that  a student's race should not be considered by colleges. Students for Fair Admissions v. Harvard.  The opinion notes "with distinct approval" the formerly discredited comments of a notable sports tout that none of the Judges in the REGIB reading this (and most do) will know because their parents were in diapers when Jimmy the Greek Synder said this: 

The decision did all but say "some of our best friends are black...:

NB: Philosophically Rumpole agrees with the proposition that two wrongs do not make a right and considering race in college admissions has inherent philosophical problems. BUT we also note that racism still pervades US society on a scale that does not allow courts and legislatures to turn a blind eye and announced that they are "Shocked! Shocked that there is gambling    racism going on in these premises..." 

2) Held that Gay people have less rights than they might think they have. Businesses can discriminate against a customer on the basis of their sexual orientation. 303 Creative LLC v. Elenis

Again, Rumpole philosophically agrees a business has a right to have signs that say "We do not serve Jews, Judges, or Armenian people" because we believe in the sanctity of property rights.  But under that premise, are we prepared to return to a society separated by race?

And in that vein, the Court announced a willingness to reexamine Brown vs. Board of Education: "What's exactly wrong if people are separate but equal?  We have three separate but equal branches of government. Why can't we have separate but equal education? "  Thomas, J, concurring in the grant of Certiorari. 

The Court also announced a grant of Cert on the issue of whether a domestic violence restraining order constitutionally can prohibit someone from possessing a firearm. First, we must all agree what we need in this country is more guns in the hands of angry and unstable people. Second, since the framers were not DV PC and didn't spend a lot of time discussing domestic violence restraining orders, the court will most certainly rule that DV restraining orders cannot stop people from carrying firearms. 

We really mean this. Follow us on this quick legal journey (judges, ask a PD to help you out on the law)

In New York State Rifle & Pistol Ass'n, Inc. v. Bruen, 213 L. Ed. 2d 387 (2022) Justice Thomas, writing on behalf of school gunmen everywhere, and the majority, wrote: 

We reiterate that the standard for applying the Second Amendment is as follows: When the Second Amendment's plain text covers an individual's conduct, the Constitution presumptively protects that conduct. The government must then justify its regulation by demonstrating that it is consistent with the Nation's historical tradition of firearm regulation. Only then may a court conclude that the individual's conduct falls outside the Second Amendment's “unqualified command.”

Earlier this year, in US v. Rahimi, the 5th Circuit struck down the constitutionality of a law prohibiting possession of a firearm when Rahimi, a violent drug dealer, was served with a domestic violence restraining order. Citing the Bruen decision, the 5th Circuit Judges, reveling in legal etoufee wrote such gems as "our ancestors would have never accepted the law on domestic violence restraining orders..."  (because they f'ing beat their slaves Rumpole notes). 

So- unless the current crop of Judges on the supreme court uncover some discussions between Jefferson and Adams on DV restraining orders: 

Adams: "Tom, when are you going to stop beating your wife?"

Jefferson: "You should try keeping Abagail in order. She has a mouth that one..." 

the court is destined to place battered women more at risk, because lets face it, there's only so many schools a shooter can shoot up with an AR15 without turning his attention to taking pot shots at battered women, with Justices Amy Comey and Clarence "Big Man" Clemmons Thomas supplying the clips. 

PETERSON NG AND FELONS AND GUNS

 In as a misbegotten prosecution as we have ever seen, the Broward State Attorneys Office (Motto: "New State Attorney, same old crap...") was handed a well deserved defeat Friday as a jury acquitted former officer Peterson for child abuse charges for his alleged failure to act as a first responder during the tragic Parkland school shooting.

A well deserved NG for a State attorneys office that doesn't know its ass from its elbow. 

You know what they need? A big HUG. Maybe a judge will hug the state attorney trial team. 

It's been done before. 

FELON IN POSSESSION OF A FIREARM

An interesting take on the felon in possession of a firearm. Judge Reeves in the Middle District has found the statute unconstitutional. Run with it. 

"It is unsurprising that the government relies on jurisprudence 

filled with such methodological flaws. The same errors define

the Supreme Court’s own Second Amendment jurisprudence."

Judge R is our new favourite Judge for paragraphs like this: 

B. Revisiting Originalism

Bruen shows us that originalism is now the Supreme Court’s

dominant mode of constitutional interpretation. This Court is

not so sure it should be.

For one, the originalist case for originalism is lacking. This

Court has yet to see evidence proving “that the original meaning

of Article III of the Constitution included the understanding

that courts should interpret the Constitution based on its

original meanings.” Erwin Chemerinsky, Worse than Nothing:

The Dangerous Fallacy of Originalism 82 (2022) [hereinafter

Worse than Nothing]. In other words, it is not clear that

founding‐era Americans collectively agreed that for time immemorial,

their descendants would be bound by the founding

generation’s views on how the Constitution should be read.

There are a lot more gems in this remarkable order. We recommend you lawyers read it (of course you judges have better things to do than read well-reasoned federal orders. Like pinochle.).

Reeves Order by Anonymous PbHV4H on Scribd

LEGAL CONFERENCE

 We've all been there. A client needs a private moment of time. The lawyer and the client huddle... and then..... 

An elbow to the face.  Link is here if the video doesn't play. 

Kudos to defense attorney who downplayed the incident and didn't sell his client out. 

JNC NOMINATIONS 

Attached is the list of lawyers nominated for the vacancies from the retirements of Judges Seraphin and Hanzman. 

Judge Hanzman's seat can be filled, but he cannot be replaced. What he did with the Chapman towers cased is unmatched in recent US legal history for the management and quick legal resolution of an enormous tragedy. There are DUI cases in the open county seat that took longer to resolve than the Chapman towers case. 

Meanwhile, one name on the list of the nominees for the County Court seat has caught our eye. 

Can you guess which one? 

JNC List Announcement (Circuit and County) by Anonymous PbHV4H on Scribd

Hint: 

THE 17TH AVENUE BRIDGE IS OPEN!!

 Long storied in song and fable, the 17th Avenue Bridge, which spans the mighty Miami River, is now open once again. This bridge which has brought countless clients to the courthouse for rescue and redemption; this bridge, which has conveyed legions of prosecutors to work in the early morning hours, hopeful that an early start to the day of trial will result in a win, only to see their hopes dashed against the rocks of a Rumpole cross and closing, is once again open, connecting our little slice of heaven known as the REGJB with the sights and smells of Cafecito like only they can make it on Calle Ocho. 

While it lacks the historical significance of the bridge at Remagen; the grandeur and majesty of the Brooklyn Bridge or the romance of the Ponce des Arts in Paris, our 17th avenue viaduct serves its purpose to those who call the crossroads of 12th street and 12th Avenue their second home. 

Welcome back old friend!

THE WORLD IS STILL HERE AND THE JAIL ALLOWS LAPTOPS!

     Well dear readers, it's a summer Monday in Miami. The world is still here. Putin is still running Russia and Judge Sayfie is still running the Eleventh Circuit of Miami-Dade. Not that those two belong in the same sentence other than those are the two topics we are blogging about. But while we are on the subject, if they ever faced off, our money is on Judge S. She would clean his clock. 

There's quite the contretemps about what attorneys can and cannot bring into the jail. Here is an updated memo- but let us add in our thoughts about these matters below the memo:

Some thoughts: 

Smart watches are peligroso! (dangerous). They have been watching War Games too much. They think we are going to take an Apple smart watch and disable the jail. We can't even get our damn watch to show us the weather anywhere other than Little Rock Arkansas. 

You can bring in computers! Hang on while we try and stop laughing. Corrections won't even let us see our clients! And the powers that be somehow think the officers at the desk will allow a laptop in????? Come on now. 

Rumpole: We are here to see our client. 

CO: You with the Public Defenders office? 

Rumpole: No, the PDs put in a notice of appearance but then we substituted in. 

CO: But if you are not with the PDs office, you cannot see the client. In fact only a Mr. Carlos Martinez is listed as the lawyer. 

Rumpole: Do you see our notice of appearance? 

CO: Yes, but unless you are a PD you cannot see the client. And what is that you got with you? 

Rumpole. A laptop. 

CO: What you think you're gonna do with that? You sure are not bringing that computer into this jail. (Turns to a friend) "Hey Sally, you're not going to believe this. There is some lawyer here who thinks he can bring a laptop into the jail!!" (loud and prolonged laughter ensues). 

Rumpole: It's not like it's a gun or a hacksaw. 

CO: Oh, you can bring those in as long as you're with the PDs office. 

And so it goes. 

Send your adventures in trying to get a laptop into the jail to our email. First person who successfully gets in with a laptop without a letter from Governor DeSantis and an order from the Florida Supreme Court wins a prize.