CHANGE OF SEASON / CHANGE OF JUDGES

You can't tell the players without a scorecard. 
And you don't know about the new Judges unless you read The Blog. 
(You know what's cool? Over the years we have become "The Blog" No further discussion needed. It's sort of nice. We like it and we rarely like anything.)

Apparently Judge Fine couldn't get out of criminal court quick enough. That's too bad. We heard great things about him. But not every civil litigator who dons the black robes  is cut out for the rough and tumble of the REGJB. Where have you gone Judge Murphy? Our courthouse turns its lonely eyes to you. 

From the Chief Judge of Criminal Court:

Good afternoon,

On Monday, June (Rumpole says the chief means September)  23^rd, newly appointed Judge Marlene Fernandez-Karavetsos  will be taking over for Judge Fine in division 2.  For now the division will remain in courtroom 6-2.  I will be sitting with her through the transition as well as Judges Tunis & Tinkler-Mendez.

As soon as the other changes are finalized I will let you know.  We will be getting Judges Altfield, Beovides and Cruz as well. We will be losing Judges Diaz, Multack & Walsh. These changes will not occur until mid-October or later. 

No offense intended to the others, but Judge Walsh is an absolute gem. Why does she want to/have to go?  You know how a judge is deemed great these days? When she is so fair and her legal background is so diverse and she has so much experience that she cannot get an appointment to the 3rd DCA because of the aforementioned qualities. That's how you know you want to be before a judge. Got some black-wearin-card-carryin-federalist society- hack whose name is being whispered for the the 3rd? RUN as fast as you can from the umpire who swears they only call balls and strikes because you're in for an unpleasant experience. 

Only because we cannot pass up the opportunity to razz the chief (and because she punches back harder)...

Shouldn't the sentence in the email read : "The division will remain in courtroom 6-2 for now.  I will be sitting with her through the transition. So will Judges Tunis & Tinkler-Mendez." 

Otherwise you could make an argument that the Chief will be sitting with Judges Fernandez-Karavestos as well as sitting with Judges Tunis and Tink. We're sure they would enjoy the company, but that's not the point. 

JOE HELLER HAS PASSED AWAY

UPDATE: DOM is a flaming liberal who doesn't want dangerous criminals to go to prison. 
His Blog Post is here 


Longtime and careful readers know Rumpole is a connoisseur  of obituaries and a life well lived. This is one of the best. 
This obituary has gone viral. We should all go out remembered as well as Joe. 

You can see it on-line here.
https://www.legacy.com/obituaries/hartfordcourant/obituary.aspx?n=joe-heller&pid=193855516&fhid=24219


We didn't know Joe, but we wish we did. He was a hell-of-a-guy. 

Joe Heller made his last undignified and largely irreverent gesture on September 8, 2019, signing off on a life, in his words, "generally well-lived and with few regrets." When the doctors confronted his daughters with the news last week that "your father is a very sick man," in unison they replied, "you have no idea." God thankfully broke the mold after Joe was born to the late Joseph Heller, Sr. and Ruth Marion (Clock) on January 24, 1937 in New Haven, CT. Being born during the depression shaped Joe's formative years and resulted in a lifetime of frugality, hoarding and cheap mischief, often at the expense of others. Being the eldest was a dubious task but he was up for the challenge and led and tortured his siblings through a childhood of obnoxious pranks, with his brother, Bob, generally serving as his wingman. Pat, Dick and Kathy were often on the receiving end of such lessons as "Ding Dong, Dogsh*t" and thwarting lunch thieves with laxative-laced chocolate cake and excrement meatloaf sandwiches. His mother was not immune to his pranks as he named his first dog, "Fart," so she would have to scream his name to come home if he wandered off. Joe started his long and illustrious career as a Library Assistant at Yale Law School Library alongside his father before hatching a plan with his lifelong buddies, Ronny Kaiser and Johnny Olson, to join the Navy and see the world together. Their plot was thwarted and the three were split up when Joe pulled the "long straw" and was assigned to a coveted base in Bermuda where he joined the "Seabees," Construction Battalion, and was appointed to the position of Construction Electrician's Mate 3rd class. His service to the country and community didn't end after his honorable discharge. Joe was a Town Constable, Volunteer Fireman and Ambulance Association member, Cross walk guard, Public Works Snow Plower and a proud member of the Antique Veterans organization. Joe was a self-taught chemist and worked at Cheeseborough-Ponds where he developed one of their first cosmetics' lines. There he met the love of his life, Irene, who was hoodwinked into thinking he was a charming individual with decorum. Boy, was she ever wrong. Joe embarrassed her daily with his mouth and choice of clothing. To this day we do not understand how he convinced our mother, an exceedingly proper woman and a pillar in her church, to sew and create the colorful costumes and props which he used for his antics. Growing up in Joe's household was never dull. If the old adage of "You only pull the hair of those you love" holds true, his three daughters were well loved. Joe was a frequent customer of the girls' beauty shops, allowing them to "do" his hair and apply make-up liberally. He lovingly assembled doll furniture and built them a play kitchen and forts in the back yard. During their formative years, Joe made sure that their moral fibers were enriched by both Archie Bunker and Benny Hill. When they began dating, Joe would greet their dates by first running their license plates and checking for bald tires. If their vehicle passed inspection, they were invited into the house where shotguns, harpoons and sheep "nutters" were left clearly on display. After retiring from running Bombaci Fuel, he was perhaps, most well-known for his role as the Essex Town "Dawg Kecher." He refused to put any of his "prisoners" down and would look for the perfect homes for them. One of them was a repeat offender who he named "A**hole" because no owner would ever keep him for very long because he was, in fact, an a**hole. My Dad would take his buddy on daily rides in his van and they'd roam around town with the breeze blowing through both of their fur. He never met a dog he didn't like, the same could not be said for the wanna-be blue bloods, snoots and summer barnacles that roamed about town. His words, not ours. Well maybe not exactly his words as those would been much more colorful. Joe was a frequent shopper at the Essex Dump and he left his family with a house full of crap, 300 pounds of birdseed and dead houseplants that they have no idea what to do with. If there was ever a treasure that he snatched out from under you among the mounds of junk, please wait the appropriate amount of time to contact the family to claim your loot. We're available tomorrow. Joe was also a consummate napper. There wasn't a road, restaurant or friend's house in Essex that he didn't fall asleep on or in. There wasn't an occasion too formal or an event too dour that Joe didn't interrupt with his apnea and voluminous snoring. Besides his beloved wife, Irene, and brother, Bobby, Joe was pre-deceased by his pet fish, Jack, who we found in the freezer last week. Left to squabble over his vast fortune, real estate holdings and "treasures" are his three daughters Michelle Heller (Andrew Bennett) of Newton, MA, Lisette Heller (Lenny Estelle) of Ivoryton, CT and Monique Heller (John Parnoff) of Old Lyme, CT. He relished his role as Papa and Grampa Joe to Zachary, Maxwell and Emily Bennett, Megan, Mackenzie and Ryan Korcak, and Giovanna and Mattea Parnoff and hopes that he taught at least one of them to cuss properly. Left with decades of fond and colorful memories are his siblings Pat Bedard of Madison, Richard (Pat) Heller of Oxford, and Kathy Heller of Killingworth, sisters-in-law, Kathy McGowan of Niantic and Diane Breslin of Killingworth, and 14 nieces and nephews. No flowers, please. The family is seeking donations to offset the expense of publishing an exceedingly long obituary which would have really pissed Joe off. Seriously, what would have made him the happiest is for you to go have a cup of coffee with a friend and bullsh*t about his antics or play a harmless prank on some unsuspecting sap. If we still haven't dissuaded you and you feel compelled to waste your hard-earned money to honor his memory, donations may be sent to: Seabee Memorial Scholarship Association, PO Box 667, Gulfport, MS 39502. A celebration of his life, with Joe laid out in all his glory, will be held on Thursday, September 12, at the Essex Fire Department, 11 Saybrook Road, from 4-7. A light dinner will be served as Joe felt no get-together was complete without food. None of his leftovers or kitchen concoctions will be pawned off on any unsuspecting guests. Feel free to be as late as you'd like as Joe was never on time for anything because of the aforementioned napping habits. Joe despised formality and stuffiness and would really be ticked off if you showed up in a suit. Dress comfortably. The family encourages you to don the most inappropriate T-Shirt that you are comfortable being seen in public with as Joe often did. Everybody has a Joe story and we'd love to hear them all. Joe faced his death and his mortality, as he did with his life, face on, often telling us that when he dropped dead to dig a hole in the back yard and just roll him in. Much to his disappointment, he will be properly interred with full military honors (and maybe Jack) next to his wife on Friday, September 13, at 10:00 am in Centerbrook Cemetery. The family is forever in debt to his neighbor, Barry Peterson, for all of his help in recent years. We couldn't have done it without you. Sorry, Mom, Lisette and I did the best we could to take care of him and keep him out of your hair as long as we could. Back in your court now. To share a memory of Joe or send a condolence to his family please visit www.rwwfh.com Arrangements by the Robinson, Wright & Weymer Funeral Home in Centerbrook.

NFL 2019 WEEK TWO

Careful research has led us to this fact: Teams playing a second divisional road game in the first two weeks of the season since 2015 are 1-14 against the spread!!! Yowza!!$$$$.  What does that mean? It means you bet AGAINST the Colts (Titans -3.5) LOSS, Bills (Giants +2) LOSS, and Chiefs (Raiders +7) LOSS this week. Yeah, it's hard to take the Raiders +7. That's only for the hardy amongst y'all. 

We also like, in no particular order, 

Eagles vs. Falcons, under 52.5 (WIN) ; Chargers v. Lions under 43 (WIN); Browns v. Jets under 44. 

And for our special, hop on the train now before it leaves the station pick, take the visiting Vikes +2.5 (try and find it at 3) over the Pack. The Pack is not back. The Vikes are the real deal and are NFC Championship bound. LOSS


SURVIVOR POOL
Rumpole took a spill on the home town Panthers Thursday night and is O...U...T out, but the pool continues. Last week saw most of the participants slip by on close calls with the Eagles and Saints. 
Top picks this week are the Ravens and the Cheaters with the Texans a distant third. 

Survivor Week 2 by Anonymous X2glnmuma on Scribd

THE TWIN TOWERS

UPDATE: On Wednesday, September 11, 2019, the NY Mets, playing at home won 9-0 on 11 eleven hits. 9 runs, 11 hits. 9-11 on 9-11. Just sayin....

Regretfully, Ms. Zhang finished second in jury widely watched trial this week before Judge Altman in Broward federal court (Motto: Federal court...but worse- it's Broward!).  We were rooting for her and she gave it her all. 

See DOM's blog for the details and the report on Judge Singhal's committee hearing for the federal spot. 

SURVIVOR POOL: NFL Thursday night football Rumpole is picking the home town Panthers to beat the visiting Tampa Bay Bucs. 

This is what we choose to remember. Not the pain and the horror, 

GREATEST OPENING EVER

Your Southern District of Florida Blog, David O Markus, Esq., blog proprietor, is breathlessly covering all aspects of USA v. Yujing Zhang, the jury trial before new federal Judge Roy Altman, where the defendant is representing herself against charges she did something wrong in, near or around Mar A Lago (reading indictments bore us to no end). 

This was her opening statement that Mr. Markus ponders may be the greatest ever: 
"Good afternoon Grand Jury. What I want to say...I don't believe I did anything wrong. And thank you USA." 

As you ponder the greatest opening statements of all time you have seen, lets break down this opening, because there is more here-much more- than meets the ear and eye. 

First: "Good afternoon Grand Jury."   Is there any better way a pro se defendant can start? She is polite, and in two words she is demonstrating her ignorance of the trial process. Grand Jury. Of course trials are not conducted before  a grand jury, but she is a small, innocent, unsophisticated defendant. A stranger in a strange land.  She doesn't know a lot. And she just proved it in four words. Bravo Ms. Zhang. So many pro se defendants strive to prove they are smarter than the prosecutor and judge. She went the other way. She zigged (or maybe Zhanged) when everyone was expecting her to zag. Excellent beginning. 

Second: "What I want to say...".  This is what she conveyed in four simple words: "I'm doing my best here. Please listen to me. This is what I want you to know."   Isn't this what openings are about? Another great sentence. 

Third: "I don't believe I did anything wrong."  Now her  brilliance  is showing .  She didn't say she didn't do anything. She is subtly admitting the government may have evidence. BUT...she didn't THINK she was doing anything wrong. No mens rea.  An argument that every juror understands. Can we convict the defendant if they didn't realize what they were doing was wrong? That they didn't know the law and they didn't want to do anything wrong.  And once again, she conveyed an entire defense in less than ten words.  Now the jurors know that they do not have to pay too much attention to all the government's proof about what she did. Can they prove WHY she did it? That is the question here. How do you prove what is in someone's mind beyond a reasonable doubt? It's infinitely more harder to prove intent then the act. The government presumably has mounds of evidence of what she did. But how much evidence do they have about intent? Once again Ms. Zhang has out maneuvered experienced prosecutors and agents. 

This was a home run opening. The Gettysburg address of openings. Lincoln has been lionized for the eloquence and brevity of his address on the battlefield. The same will be said for Yujing Zhang. Go back and re-read her opening. There is poetry in how it is constructed. Four words. Four words. Seven words explaining her defense. And four words to close. No other trial lawyer we know could have done this as simply and poetically and economically as she did. What do jurors hate about lawyers? Being long winded and boring and wasting their time. No worries about that in Ms. Zhang's opening. 

Fourth: "And thank you USA." Sheer genius. How many times have we seen lawyers stumble through a long, not believable, and thoroughly boring pandering to the jury about thanking them for their time and how important jury service is and how no one else can do their jobs without them showing up, blah blah blah blah.

What do we   they chant at Trump rallies? USA! USA! USA!. It evokes memories of the Olympic hockey team's miracle victory over the Russians in 1980. It is the simple jingoistic chant meant to invoke pride in our country.  She nailed it with again four simple words. 
There is so much more to this woman, Yujing Zhang, who at the start of the trial showed up wearing her simple, peasant, jail issued brown clothing. She was embracing the underdog role. The Judge was flummoxed and the trial was in disarray before it began. Check out DOM's blog for all the coverage on that. 

This is no simple pro se defendant fighting against all odds- although that is the story line she is conveying. Yujing Zhang is one of the greatest, most effective, and disarmingly smart trial lawyers ever to make an appearance in a court in Florida.  Mark our words. This is a trial and a courtroom performance not to be missed.  

FABER WINS APPEAL

Justice Thomas issued the opinion of the Blog Court of Appeals, Survivor Pool Division: 

Judge Robin Faber, judge, soon to be head-honcho of Criminal County Court, and all around nice guy who reads the blog and participates in the survivor pool appeals the Justice Building  Blog author's decision that the appellant  picked the Fins in the first week of the Survivor Pool. We have jurisdiction. The controversy is justiciable.  
Because the record fully supports the appellant's position, and Rumpole has confessed a rare error, the decision is reversed and remanded with directions to change Judge Faber's pick to the Ravens and to restore him to the survivor pool. 
Roberts, Ginsberg, Sotomayor, Kavenaugh, Gorsuch, Thomas, concur. 

Appendix:

Robin Faber	Tue, Aug 27, 8:48 AM (13 days ago)
to me

Week 1 pick = Ravens over Dolphins

Also, Weisman and Grieco are in having picked the Saints before the game began. 

Football 2019 Week One

We're not going to do this every week because of a busy schedule, but for week one, here's some tips to earn a bit extra for the pub this weekend:

Your Miami Dolphins are going to have a tough year. It's like having a client with three cases in ROC court. Not much good going on. But Rumpole specializes in making lemonade from lemons, and the way to play the Fins is UNDER. Ravens at Fins, Under 40.5. LOSS Who expected the Fins to be this bad? We did. See our comment in the prior post about not winning a game until Tiffany Trump is president. 

Titans at Browns. We are not ready to hop on the Browns bandwagon just yet. Take the Titans +5.5 and look for 6. WIN. NOT EVEN CLOSE.Browns just not that great. 

The Tampa Bay Buccaneers are not a team you hear much about. Get ready. Their HQ Bruce Arians is a QB whisperer, which is why Rumpole drafted the hurler for TB and we like the hometown Bucs giving one against a way overrated 49'ers team which, in a few weeks from now will be saying about their QB "what have we gotten ourselves into????" LOSS

Lions at Cardinals. Always bet UNDER against a rookie QB making his first start. Under 46. LOSS

Steelers at Cheaters. Under 46. Don't see a lot of Offense here either way and the Cheaters may have the best CBs in the league, so teams are going to have to run the rock, and that means slow, low scoring games.  And AB isn't eligible to play tonight. WIN

Gints at Cowpokes. Long time and careful readers of the blog know we have made a small fortune betting against the Cowpokes. But today we like the Gints even less. Sorry Eli, we love ya. Those two spankings you gave the cheaters in the SB are something we will never forget. But it's over Johnny. Take Dallas -7 at home. BIG WIN NOT EVEN CLOSE 

SURVIVOR POOL COMING SHORTLY 
UPDATES: 
1) ERATTA: The Hon. Judge Faber appealed his pick of the Fins. The record reveals undisputed evidence that Faber in fact picked the Ravens. Appeal Granted. Reversed and remanded with instructions. 

Robin Faber	Tue, Aug 27, 8:48 AM (13 days ago)
to me

Week 1 pick = Ravens over Dolphins

2) Weisman and Grieco are in with the Saints. 

No one came close to hitting the Bears/Packers total, which shows how hard it will be to earn a week pass this year. 
If anyone knows Mr. Weisman, he is the only one who has not made a pick. Also, people can email us before the 4pm game, before the 8pm game, and even before the MNF game and enter the pool with their pick. 
Clay Kaeiser, a Chicagoan went with his heart and not his head, and is the first out this year. 
UPDATE: Richard Baron, Judge Faber, Real Fake Former Judge all take heart breaking first week losses. Baron had the Jets, who had the game into the hand until a topsy-turvy fourth quarter put the Bills ahead for good. 
Meanwhile, No Weisman pick. He's down to the Sunday night game or one of two MNF games. 
UPDATE: Weisman picks Saints for MNF

Survivor Week 1 by Anonymous X2glnmuma on Scribd

FOOTBALL 2019 PREDICTIONS

Football is back. As is our custom, we give you some predictions that you can bank on, ending with our super bowl predication and our lock sold 100% guarantee SB coin flip that will allow you to double your money, guaranteed. 

So here are our  predictions and why your 2019 Miami Dolphins will win the Super Bowl. *

1) The NFC championship game will be the Saints at the 49'ers. Long shot: Packers at San Fran

2) Ride the Seahawks all the way to the playoffs. But no further.

3) Avoid the Rams. 

4) The Cleveland Browns will... win about four games. There are some certainties in the universe. You cannot exceed the speed of light. Energy cannot be created or destroyed, only altered. Broward has  a very unfair court system. And the Cleveland Browns cannot be successful. It will upset the order of things if the Browns become winners. Schrodinger's cat will not just live, it will bite you. Mike Satz will order a case against an innocent man dismissed. Trump will admit he is liar. Fox News will endorse Bernie Sanders for President. These are some of the improbable things that would occur if Cleveland is successful. 

5) The Cowboys will stink. Bet against them every week except week one. 

6) Patrick Mahomes is the real deal. So are the Chiefs who will be in the Super Bowl this year.  KC beats long shot Titans in AFC Championship game is our long shot prediction. More likely, in a repeat KC beats the Cheaters. 

7) J...E....T....S... Jets Jets Jets are better than you think. 

8) Remember the NY football Giants and Eli Manning? Neither do we. 

9)  Antonio Brown is listed in the Robert Muller report. Really. 

10)  With the First Overall pick in the 2020 draft, the Miami Dolphins select....

11) The Cincinnati Bengals will fumble the coin toss at least once. They may also never win a game until Tiffany Trump is President. 

12) Overrated: Lions, Vikes, Bears, Browns, Ravens, Falcons, Texans, Rams, Cheaters.  

13) Going to have a bad year and everyone knows it: Miami, Bengals,  Raiders,  Giants, 

14) Might surprise ya: Jets, Jags, Seahawks, Jameis Winston and the Bucs, Bills and the Titans.

15) Bill Belichick doesn't have a reflection in a mirror. 🧛🧛This explains most of it. 

16) Your next Chairman of the Federal Reserve....Antonio Brown. 

17) POTUS is impeached by end of year. Senate goes into recess until after election as Mitch McConnell stages a sit-in at the Capitol while his aides bring him nourishment from McDonalds every day.


* Not really. 

HAGUE RETURNS

In an "Ali like" return to the ring, Judge Andy Hague (Ret)., has returned to his roots, soon to be joining the Dade County State Attorneys to begin where he left off- Gang Prosecutions. 
All things come full circle in life and law. 

Judge Hague joins his colleague Judge Brennan (Ret) at the SAO, where there is no truth to the rumor that their offices are secretly referred to as "chambers." 

Longtime and careful readers of the blog may recall that Judge Flor Lobree, currently of the 3rd DCA returned to the SAO when she lost an election. Things seemed to work out for her.

What's going on over there? Is there free lunch? Is it the parking, or do men and women just swoon over a badge? 

In any event, Judge Hague was a great prosecutor, and Dade County is lucky to have him back working to keep our County safe. 

STUFF AND SURVIVOR POOL

We don't understand this. Don't you just electronically file a motion. And what's a "JAC motion?" 

And the best part of the training is many of the observant Jewish lawyers are free that day because it's a holiday that they do not work on. Well done JAC (or whomever)!




"Objection Judge! We filed a JAC motion and the court granted it in part, and the testimony about the hidden fruit in the valise is clearly covered." 

MENTORS: We also do not understand this. Is it substance over style? Or vice-a-versa?  How do you moderate mentors? What in the Sam Hill is this? BUT, and this is a big BUT...."Coffee AND dessert will be served" so count us IN.  

Mentors by Anonymous X2glnmuma on Scribd

SURVIVOR POOL
Hop in. The water is warm (global warming and all).  How hard can it be? Just pick one winner every week, no spread. Colts over Chiefs? You got it. Once you use a team, you cannot use them for the rest of the year. 

Email us Howardroark21@gmail.com to sign up. 
Big cash prizes (not). Admiration of the legal and football community (yes). 

COURTS TO RE-OPEN & SURVIVOR POOL

UPDATE: Court's on Wednesday will have two(2!, count em) calendars for lawyers to choose from. One from column A; One from Column B. Calendars for Tuesday AND Wednesday will be available to litigate your case. Judges will have the opportunity to showcase that blazing intellect that got them their appointment. 

Filling out their name correctly on the Federalist Society application helps. Extra Credit: "Describe the philosophical  altruist-collectivist implications in the Supreme Court's decision in Wickard v. Filburn, 317 U.S 111 (1942)." 
OK, that's asking too much, but surely "judge can we handle my motion for discovery set on Tuesday's calendar?" should be within most robed-readers grasp. 

Courts are re-opening tomorrow- Wednesday. We can all share our hurricane near-miss stories. 
We were lucky. But we will not always be lucky. The fact is statistically Miami will be hit by a hurricane the size of the one that devastated Puerto Rico two years ago. And we are not ready by any stretch of the imagination.  The damage will be incredible. And Miami will suffer. Sorry, but the truth must be faced. Miami Beach will be swamped. And the large new towers built will be blasted apart by the wind. 

SURVIVOR POOL
Speaking of fun times, it's that time of year again. The award winning, earth shaking, news making, Viagra taking, legendary E-Street Band  Blog Survivor Pool.  ((c) Rumpole 2019, all rights reserved. ). 

First NFL Game is Thursday night, AND we have our first contest to win a free week pass. Besides sending us your pick for the week, feel free to send us the exact total for the Bears/Packers Thursday night game. You need to hit the exact total to win a week pass in the survivor pool. For example, if the Pack beat Da Bears 20-10, the total is 30. 
You can use the pass whenever you wish. 
Send an email to Howardroark21@gmail.com to register for the 2019 survivor pool. And while you're at it, send a pick for the week and a total for the Thursday night game, and have fun. 

HURRICANE DORIAN

UPDATE #3. Dorian has edged north of West Palm, but remains spinning mostly in place just off-shore. Courts remained closed Tuesday, and will reopen Wednesday assuming it doesn't spin back on itself. 
This was Ivan in 2004:

UPDATE#2  First. The storm has slowed down, but it has not yet turned. Like waiting for a judge at an 8am calendar who is late- everyone is watching the clock. 
Second. An unnamed altruist wants us to publish the Court Emergency Number: 305-349-7777. In the future, when the danger is past, the number is useful for a host of reasons. "Hello. Emergency Operations? I'm waiting on a jury on the fourth floor of REGJB, and the M&M's are stuck in the vending machine. Please send help." 

UPDATE: Schools closed in Dade and Broward and West Palm for TUESDAY. Dade and Broward have announced COURTS ARE CLOSED TUESDAY. The SDFL website says they tie the closure of courts to the closure of schools. With WPB, Dade and Broward schools cerrado, federal court is also closed Tuesday. 

Hello this is Rumpole. I have put aside for the moment the arrogant, royal persona that our readers find so maddening yet endearing. The "smarter than you" posts and comments , although we are in fact smarter than 99.9% of you (no one said this was going to be easy). 

Hurricane Dorian is a massive, dangerous storm. Hurricanes are very unpredictable. If you Google hurricane paths, you will see storms stopping and doubling back on themselves. Hurricanes wobble as they approach land and they can veer fifty miles north or south in the blink of an eye-wall. 

Because of our anxiety, there is a natural fixation on the hurricane paths and cones, and relief when the cone shifts so that we appear to be out of danger. Make no mistake that until this storm dissipates, we in South Florida are not out of danger, cone or no cone. 

The email from Broward County announcing that court will open on Tuesday was complete folly. The storm has slowed, and by Tuesday, at best, 50-100 mile winds could well be hitting Ft. Lauderdale. Not exactly the type of weather lawyers and clients should be out in. We are hopeful they will rescind that order. But being Broward, they are as unpredictable as hurricanes. 

Many of us can still vividly remember the feelings of being huddled in a closet and watching our roof fly away as Andrew slammed into South Dade. And recall that days before Andrew hit, it was predicted to strike North Broward. 

So please, listen to us. Continue your preparation. Put up your shutters, or take your family and leave for a few days. Have water and some dry food and candles and a battery operated radio ready to go, 
We want Dorian to miss us. We see the cone shift and we immediately relax. But last night (Saturday-Sunday) the cone shifted south again. In the last three days the south end of the cone has gone from covering  the middle keys to being on the Dade Broward border. 

We are not in the clear and we will not know for sure until the storm misses us and dissipates. 
Until then, please stay safe. 
We like having a lot of readers. 

Your obt.  svt. 
H. Rumpole, Esq. Blog Proprietor.