WELCOME TO THE OFFICIAL RICHARD E GERSTEIN JUSTICE BUILDING BLOG. THIS BLOG IS DEDICATED TO JUSTICE BUILDING RUMOR, HUMOR, AND A DISCUSSION ABOUT AND BETWEEN THE JUDGES, LAWYERS AND THE DEDICATED SUPPORT STAFF, CLERKS, COURT REPORTERS, AND CORRECTIONAL OFFICERS WHO LABOR IN THE WORLD OF MIAMI'S CRIMINAL JUSTICE. POST YOUR COMMENTS, OR SEND RUMPOLE A PRIVATE EMAIL AT HOWARDROARK21@GMAIL.COM. Winner of the prestigious Cushing Left Anterior Descending Artery Award.

Monday, November 26, 2018

LUNCH AND LEARN THIS WEDNESDAY

Have a bite, learn to do what's right. 
CLE and some Brie? 
What ruins a lawyer's day the most? The bounced check for fees on that juicy new case? 
Getting a call on a new case in Broward? 
No, it's probably that letter with the return address from "The Florida Bar" (motto: "Collecting Fees and disciplining lawyers since the 1800's"). 



Wednesday's lunch and learn with a Bar Counsel Jennifer Falcone and Lawyer Brian Tannebaum- defender of the poor, the weak, the gullible lawyers of this great State, will tell you everything you wanted to know about how not to get a Bar Complaint. 

As an addendum to the lecture, here are Rumpole's oft-sought rules for "How Not To Get  A Bar Complaint". 

1. Do not sleep with your client, their spouse or significant other or anyone they know. 
2. Always get a signed retainer. 
3. Send weekly emails updating them on your case. For example: "The prosecution wants 120 years based on their file which says 'victim and police officer want 120 years' for the worthless check case even though it's a first offense. The Judge is newly appointed from a probate firm and thinks the offer sounds fair. I am scheduling depositions. As always, remember to make your payments in cash.
4. Do not  send nasty or threatening emails to opposing counsel. 
5. Do not reveal a client's confidences. For example: Client is a real estate developer who confides in you that he wants to run for president on the platform that global warming is fake,  the news is fake, judges are biased, and the country is about to be  overrun from a caravan of monks and orphans  from Uruguay.  The client asks you to arrange a payoff to a porn star he slept with while married so she doesn't spill the beans during his campaign. You cannot surreptitiously record the client during this discussion. Capiche?
6. Do not split fees with non-lawyers. 
7. Do not pay bondsmen to refer you cases. Or ambulance drivers. Or corrections officers. 
8. Meet all court deadlines. 
9. Do not pay your mortgage from your trust account. Or your mistress's rent. 
10. When in doubt, email Rumpole. We will guide you through your ethical dilemma. 

PS: Play hookey one day this week, sneak out of the office and go to Brickell City Center and see the movie Green Book. It will make your day. Vigo Mortensen is amazing. Should get an Oscar nomination. 

From Occupied America, where the boarder is being stormed by vicious thugs (see below) and there is no such thing as global warming (see below), Fight the Power!


Thugs storming the border 




Firefighter mismanaging the forest and causing fires in California 




1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Rump, I've asked a couple times lately about the fact that your recent posts only seem to get about 3-5 replies. You haven't posted my inquiries … whazzup?