Saturday, March 03, 2007


"And all the boards did shrink...." whoops, wrong poem.

There are several interesting trials that are continuing or were concluded this week.

Of course everyone was talking about the implosion of the murder case before Judge Reemberto Diaz this week. After spending a week picking a jury, attorneys Andy Rier, Renee Sotorrio, and everyone’s favourite Rumpole suspect Phil Reizenstein were defending two men accused of second degree murder.

The word is that before the defense attorneys could say “no way, Jose” witnesses were imploding and exploding on direct examination. Tales of coerced and tainted photographic identifications filled the air, along with direct accusations by witnesses of being threatened by the police. One eyewitness, the girlfriend of the deceased, spoke of being repeatedly threatened with having her children taken away from her.

Before you could say NOT GUILTY, the case was nolle prossed during trial.

We hear the real fireworks happened afterwards, when the police department read the SAO spinmeister’s initial statements to everyone's favourite Herald Scribe about taking allegations of police misconduct seriously. Thus, we were not surprised to see the SAO back in the paper next day stating that there would be no investigation of the police.

From an email we received from one of the attorneys:


...Perhaps the worst part of this smelly affair was that the Lead Detective was the one who arrested the eyewitness for perjury. The Eyewitness accused the lead detective of threatening her and threatening to take her children away from her. At the very least, these accusations should be investigated. And then, it is the lead detective who signs the Arrest Report for perjury and arrests the eyewitness. If that is not making good on a threat, then I don’t know what is.

At the bond hearing the next day, the prosecution told the Judge that the eyewitness had two outstanding bench warrants as well as the new perjury charge. There is one problem with that Rumpole: The eyewitness said she was in the state attorneys office the previous week being pre-tried, and the police and the state had contact with the eyewitness on the day of her testimony as well. At no time did they either notify the defense that they were giving her the benefit of not executing those warrants (A “Giglio” violation) and at no time did they ever seek to serve those warrants until she incurred their anger. That smells. Bad. “

Rumpole replies: Something’s rotten in Demark, as well as at 1350 NW 12th Avenue. Doesn’t it seem like, for the appearance of propriety, some independent agency should review what happened here?

Now to the case two floors down: The Murder Trial Before Judge Blake.

We hear attorneys Bob Amsel and David Raben had quite a time on Friday as the lead detective slinked on the witness stand to admit romantic involvement with one of the witnesses.
"What’s a good murder case without a little illicit sex?" we always say.
We hear that it was definitely a defense day on Friday, and the case without a body is looking pretty good for the defense.


And now, word reached us late Friday that attorney and noted tough guy, Scott Hidnert, seen around these parts as one of those attorneys scurrying from courtroom to courtroom handling a bevy of traffic tickets and bullying thuggish motorcycle cops, put a bullet between the eyes of a putative robber on Thursday.

Well Done Mr. Hidnert.

And if you need representation on any possible criminal charges, just say “Help Rumpole” and we will be there with our copy of the self defense jury instruction.
Two pieces of advice:
1) If one of the detective investigating the shooting makes an amorous advance, as is apparently the want of detectives in this town of late, resist the temptation to stray into the land of law enforcement Lotharios, and
2) If your statement is not exactly the way the certain detectives would like it to be, well, perhaps you’d better have a good bondsman on standby, since arresting witnesses in Miami has taken on a certain cache these days.
Well there is it, just another week in Paradise.
To summarize: one murder case ended with a nolle prosse and the eyewitness being arrested; another murder case continued with love in the air; and one defense attorney ended the life of a would be robber before a tragedy occurred.
See You In Court next week.


Anonymous said...

and you wonder why people have so little respect for the cops. i can totally see a typical shit bag miami :detective: some scared lady to lie or lose your kids.

the blood of this murder is now on that detective, and of course KFR will never have the sack to do anything about it. (except file perjury charges agasint the woman).

this system is a joke.

Anonymous said...

Rumpole, the big news at the end of the week was the fancy "good bye Fed PD's- hello private practice party" thrown for Bill Barzee at the swanky home of coral gables supporters. Word reached even steven that a gaggle of federal and state court judges attended, including the soon to be pontiff of the federal college of cardinals, a few chief state court judges and head honchos, as well as the top politicos in town.

All in all it was a successful send off for BB as he heads into private practice with everyone's favorite federal blogger (as you like to say) David O Markus.

Unfortuntely for fans of even steven, apparently everyone behaved themselves and there was no reported scandals in the making. It was just a party, not a murder investigation. Ha ha ha.

Anyone, good luck B Barzee.

Anonymous said...

My murder case has a first name
its o..s..c...a..r

my murder case has a second name

its ...m...e...y...e...r

I like to try them everyday

and if you ask me why...I'll say

cause andy rier has a way with

m..u..r...d...e..r..cases everyday.

Anonymous said...

That's the funniest thing since someone called kenny weisman C3PO

Anonymous said...

since when is a traffic bottom feeder called "prominent".

Anonymous said...

Scott Hidnert hasn't shown his face in the REG Justice Building in years. It is his attorneys who do the running from courtroom to courtroom. He stays at the office and makes the big bucks $69 at a time.

Anonymous said...

Throughout my years of practice, I've heard many defendants and witnesses say that the only reason they made a statement or said what the detective wanted to hear was that the detective threatened to have HRS (now DCF) take away their kids. It's an old underhanded tactic of corecive interrogation that doesn't necessarily lead to the truth, but allows the detective to quickly count the case as closed.

Anonymous said...

I can't get this scene out of my mind:

Hidnert (holding gun) I know what you're thinking. Did I fire 5 shots or 6? Well, in all this confusion, I can't remember myself. So, punk, go ahead..reach for the gun...go ahead, make my day.

Anonymous said...

Scott Hidnert for Sheriff

Andy Kotzin for Deputy Sheriff

Andy Reir for PD

Anonymous said...

Just heard a commercial on 790 the Ticket:

"Hi- This is Dr. Shapiro for the hair institute...and this is former Judge Jon Colby ... I'm proud to say I am a top litigator and a patient of Dr. Shapiro's..."

Anonymous said...

they did NOT say Judge Colby, they said "ANDY BOROS"!

Anonymous said...

Doll hair city!

Anonymous said...

The Herald labels Hindert as a "TICKET-BUSTER"! LOL

Anonymous said...

Scott Hindert is giving shooting lessons in courtroom 4-1 next Thursday.

Anonymous said...

The Florida Bar barred Hidnert from using the trade name "Ticketbuster" but the bar can't prohibit the Herald from printing it.

Anonymous said...

Here is the full story:

Well-known traffic ticket attorney Scott Hidnert shot and killed a masked man who police say was trying to rob him.

A prominent Miami-Dade traffic-ticket lawyer, facing an armed robber, pulled a gun from his glove compartment and stopped his attacker dead with a volley of gunfire.

Traffic Ticket Office's Scott Hidnert was backing out of his North-Central Miami-Dade office in his black Mercedes Thursday night when the robber rushed him.

Handcuffs stuffed in his pocket and a ski mask pulled over his head, the attacker pointed his weapon at Hidnert.

''I'm lucky to be alive,'' the lawyer said.

Hidnert has been called the ''granddaddy'' of ticket defenders.

He founded a firm called Ticket Busters in 1992, one of the first to focus on misdemeanors such as speeding and running red lights.

The firm's name changed to Traffic Ticket Office three years later. Today, the firm offers legal help in Miami-Dade for $69 and up.

The incident follows two recent high-profile self-defense shootings, both fatal, neither resulting in criminal charges.

Last year, a new Florida law was enacted that loosened the standard for self-defense, allowing threatened citizens to shoot first even if attackers don't show a gun.

''I don't expect any charges. He had a gun and was aiming at me,'' Hidnert said. ``If his gun didn't jam, he would have shot me.''

Miami-Dade police spokesman detective Roy Rutland declined to discuss charges. ``The entire case is still under investigation.''

Said Miami-Dade State Attorney's spokesman Ed Griffith: ``As part of the normal procedure, we always review all of the details.''

Miami-Dade's homicide bureau didn't release the name of the slain robber.

Why target Hidnert? The lawyer said he doesn't know.

The robber's name didn't appear in a database of clients. The man, Hidnert's office believes, jumped the six-foot parking lot gate.

''He was crouched down behind a Dumpster,'' said Jonathan Bennett, office manager of Traffic Ticket Office.

Hidnert's office gave this account:

The firm had a longtime office in Miami Shores before moving in December to a nearby building, 720 NW 102nd St. It is open from 8 a.m. to 9 p.m.

Although it was after closing time, staffers were waiting on a BellSouth repairman to fix their office phones, Bennett said. The repairman arrived and began work in front of the building.

About 9:45 p.m., Hidnert hopped in his black 2006 Mercedes E350, parked in the gated, well-lit parking lot. Suddenly, the gloved robber appeared.

Hidnert tried backing out, Bennett said. The electronic gate was too slow.

The man pulled the trigger of his weapon, but the gun jammed, Hidnert said. No words were exchanged.

Hidnert snapped open his glove compartment, grabbed his handgun, opened the driver's side-door and fired ''several shots,'' Bennett said.

Another robber, lurking beyond the gate, disappeared into the night.

A Miami Beach resident, Hidnert is married and has two children.

''It was a horrible experience,'' Hidnert said.

By Friday afternoon, Hidnert had returned to work.

Anonymous said...

The would be robber was adjudicted on a speeding and didn't get his $69 refund.

Anonymous said...

Imagine if the robbery was successful. The robbers grab the deposit bag and hop into their getaway vehicle and speed away. They reach their lair, and all three crowd around to divy up the swag:

Robber 1: "69,69,69,69, jeeze its all checks for 69.

Robber 2 (curses in spanish)

robber 3 That mutha!!! Here's a results letter addressed to me- that jerk lost my case and I got adjudicated and sent to traffic school.

Robber 1: At least you'll get your 68 dollar check bacj

Robber 2- here it is. (hands it to robber 3)

Robber 1 (laughs)

scene fades to black as we hear

robber 1: 69 dollars 69 dollars, 69 dollars.

announcer: Crime does not pay. But neither does cheating uncle sam. The robbers filed an anonymous complaint against Hidnert with the IRS. It seems Hidnert didn't have any cash in his deposit sack, and the IRS found that suspicious.

Trial was held in Department 69 of the Los Angeles Superior Court. In a moment, the results of that trial:

Robber 1 was found guilty of armed robbery. The government moved for a reduction of sentence based on the robber's cooperation with the IRS.

Robbers 2& 3 were found guilty as principals to armed robbery. The government moved to reduce their sentences based on their cooperation with the IRS.

Scott "six shooter" Hidnert was found guilty of tax evasion and conspiracy to evade the tax laws of the United States Of America. He is currently serving a 16 month sentence at the United States Prison at Lompac California.

Dum da dum dum. The Story you have seen is true. The names were changed to protect the innocent.

Anonymous said...

This blog keeps getting funnier and funnier.

Anonymous said...

im glad that you make yourself laugh. if you were a criminal you would be a turd burglar

Anonymous said...

I heard that a former Miami ASA is one of the PDs representing Couey. Is this true?

Anonymous said...

Did anyone catch the KFR press conference yesterday? And I paraphrase, "Instead of homes for the poor, we got [dramatic pause] a watermelon." Priceless, simply priceless.

Anonymous said...


AP/UPI/REUTERS The Cochran Law Firm, a nationwide law firm, d/b/a Miami as Leeds and Colby announced the purchase of the Miami based Hair Restoration Clinic run by Dr. Shapiro. Hereinafter the enterprise shall be known as

Dr. Shapiro's and the Cochran Law Firm's Hair Institute.

"This is Judge Colby for the Cochran law Firm's Hair Institute. I'm not just a satisifed customer...I'm the owner!!!"

Anonymous said...

I aver that one of Rumpole's best signature phrases is when he refers to the State Attorney as Fernandle.

I think it's funnny.

I do.


The Joffee report can be read on the Justice Building Blog and downloaded as a daily poscast from ITUNES. The Joffee report is a freee podcast of reporting on Miami Legal Affairs.
(c) The Joffee report. All rights reserved. MCXVIIIL.

Anonymous said...

what Rumpole was referring to in the opening lines of his post, was a stanza from the Rime Of the Ancient Mariner (and yes..."Rime" is correct...Google it.)

Day after day, day after day,
We stuck, nor breath nor motion ;
As idle as a painted ship
Upon a painted ocean.

water water everywhere
and all the boards did shrink
water water everywhere
nor any drop to drink

Anonymous said...

Ladies and gentleman...I have the distinct honor and high pleasure of introducing to you the next Public Defender for the County of Dade....Bill Barzee!!!!

Anonymous said...

I believe Morris Carranza (sp?) is the former Miami ASA now defending Couey.

Anonymous said...

Scott Hidnert -tough guy. Now I've heard it all.

Thank you..you've been a great audience ...don't forget to tip your waitress...they're great.
Thanks for coming.

Anonymous said...

To Rumpole Hunter on yesterdays comments...

wasn't one of the earlier clues at one of the websites on the six stages of Rumpole (not to be confused with the seven seals of Rumpole) Robert Lee and Ulysses Grant? I seem to remember needing to answer that to move on in one of those acrostic Rumpole puzzles. Ir Rumpole at Appromatix was a clue, this whole Rumpole thing is taking a decided turn for the civil war dontcha think?

Anonymous said...

Morris Carranza interned for Steven Marks and me at the State Attorney's office in Miami sometime around 1997 or 98. I do believe he became an ASA in miami for a short while and now is a PD in Tavares Florida.

E. Garcia

Anonymous said...

Also, the florida bar says Morris was admitted to the bar in 2003. My guidance and wisdom must have allowed him to be an attorney for only 3 years and represent clients charged with first degree murder!!

E. Garcia

Anonymous said...

To Scott Hidnert -

Bravo on your self preservation techniques. I am glad you made it out ok. I have nothing but love
for your business plan and success
and I don't want to be labeled as
a player hater.

My only question is why in the world would you move your office
from NE 2nd Ave in Miami Shores,
East of 95 to NW 7th Avenue in
Liberty City, West of 95.

Not the smartest thing for a white
boy like yourself to be driving around in a new model Mercedes
at 9:30pm in Liberty City.

Advice - You may need to hire a security guard if you want to continue working those late hours in the hood and stay alive.

Anonymous said...

Scott...be careful for any kind of retribution...these freaks are gonna be mad you killed one of their friends and may try to get revenge.

Anonymous said...

holy crap! i didnt think of that. i'm not ascared of you toughs!!!

you want a piece of me??? huh?? do ya???


Anonymous said...

all right can't-stand-ya simmer down.......