Of all the mistakes we could make whilst arguing a case this, most assuredly, is NOT one of them.
“Listen, you’re not understanding the issue. Try reading the briefs and not your clerk’s notes….” Yeah, that could happen.
And
“I understand your confusion, having not read any of the cases I have cited …” Sure, that might slip out.
But this mistake? NEVER ever ever.
There was some confusion about courts being open Thursday July 3 with Governor Detain Immigrant Children closing state offices. It appears Courts are open. Ask for a Jury. Don’t waive speedies.
The big beautiful bill is being debated in the senate on Monday, Of the many many many problems (like paying for tax cuts by reducing health insurance for about 11 million Americans by making it nearly impossible to qualify and stay insured) are not only the canceling of tax cuts for wind and solar energy but the actual tax increases on those industries. Why is this so important? We are in the midst of a third revolution- AI. And AI runs on vast data centers that consume enormous amounts of power. The centers can be powered by wind and solar energy, but now we are removing that option.
How much power are we talking about? By 2030 data centers alone will require more electricity than what is now consumed in the US for all manufacturing. So naturally the geniuses in DC want to cripple our ability to cleanly and cheaply produce that energy. Smart.
Also, skip those shots. Flu. Covid. Measles. Mumps? Fake news. Cod liver oil cures all. Here’s a heart warming story on why no one needs the measles shot anymore(note that this is sarcasm.) Measles is now killing Americans. Something that we would have never said or written in 1960, 1970, 1980, 1990, 2000, 2010, and 2020. But this is 2025 and we are speeding towards the dark ages as fast as many in Washington can take us, Prayer cures all- until your appendix bursts and you need a surgeon but won’t agree to her wearing a mask during surgery (masks don’t work right?) or giving you anesthesia full of drugs you haven’t researched.
Two sad stories.
First, the U of Virginia caved to blackmail and fired their very popular and talented university president to resolve a Justice Department investigation. The crime- U of V did not sufficiently dismantle its DEI programs expanding inclusivity in the college experience, thus violating, in the view of DOJ cretins prosecutors, the 1964 Civil Rights Act. The DOJ demanded the resignation of President Jim Ryan to settle the investigation., Truly Orwellian. The article is here.
And here is the sad story of the son of Moroccan immigrants whose parents cannot accept his sexuality.We have a take on the end of the op ed piece which we will share later after you have read the story which is here,
YOUR MONDAY FUNDAY Brain teaser.
Four men are in a room.
Barack is reading a book.
Joe is playing chess.
Bill is texting on his phone.
What is the fifth man doing?
(Donald is absent, playing golf).
This is a plea. Maybe it can be dismissed as a plea made by a grumpy Non-Gen X,Y,Z,A male blogger. But maybe you should pause a moment and consider it.
First, what we are not asking. Keep your phone on whilst waiting for your case to be called in court. The Judge is playing candy crush on her screen on the bench, so there is no reason why you should not be trying to advance to the next level.
Keep your phone on during that bad Hinge date because maybe you get a Tinder match and can hook up once you ditch Mr. I’m getting an MBA to work at Goldman Sachs and then in twenty years I’m going to use my Art History Degree to open a Bed and Breakfast in Bend, Oregon and decorate it in post modern 1870’s Egyptian Street Art, or Ms. I left my job at an advertising firm and make 40K a month as a food and bar influencer for NYC concentrating on FIDI so please take my IG and Tik Tok…
We get it. You need your phone. We all do.
Flash back to last year. Rumpole is blissfully wandering through the Van Gogh exhibit at the Met in NYC on Fifth Avenue. We are a member so we don’t wait in lines. In the galleries there are an overwhelming number of tourists. We can tell by the foreign languages they are speaking. And we can tell because they ALL- EVERY ONE OF THEM - have their phones out and are relentlessly and furiously recording every single picture. A middle aged Asian woman from China, her brow furrowed, darts from Van Gogh to Van Gogh, a ten second video and vroom! She’s elbowing her way to the front of the next one to do the same. It’s like the paintings are the plans to the Atomic Bomb and she’s Ethel Rosenberg. *
Recently, some idiot tourist sat on a crystal chair in the Palazzo Maffei in Verona, Italy, breaking it. Last week a tourist in the Uffizi in Florence backed into a 17th century painting of Fernando de Medici, tying to replicate Medici’s pose for their selfie.
In the Met, few were contemplating Van Gogh’s masterpieces. The golden wheat fields, the beguiling self portraits, one done months before the artist took his own life. The impact of art on the soul was lost. The experience became one long post card- a picture of the leaning tower of Pisa, or the Eiffel Tower, or Buckingham Palace- I was here- LOOK. LOOK AT ME NEXT TO VAN GOGH’S SUNFLOWERS … I WAS HERE… I DID THIS….DON’T YOU WANT TO BE ME?
No, we don’t. There is not one piece of art that has not been digitized and is not available for free on line. So why lose the experience of art on the desperate desire to prove you saw the painting?
It makes no sense.
We can spend an hour looking at one or two Rothkos and get lost in the wonder of how a few stripes of paint on a canvass makes us feel. And then we can repair to a favourite coffee shop in the West Village and debate Rothko’s influence over a dark espresso and crusty croissant. Is there not a better way to spend a day? How can anyone who races through an exhibition with their phone out recount how the art affected them if they don’t spend time contemplating the picture?
It makes no sense.
One last analogy. Imagine watching Tom Seaver in 1969 pitch a two-hit shutout as the Miracle Mets were on their way to an improbable World Series victory. Seaver was one of the great pitchers of all time. We saw him do this at Shea stadium that year. The sound of the ball popping in the catcher’s glove is indelible. The frustrations on the faces of hitters who could not figure him out remains with us to this day. And we had no phone. No camera. We just sat and watched and were washed over in the experience of being there.
That is what our phone generation is losing- the experience of seeing and feeling. They are replacing it with the proof of presence. I WAS THERE. I DID THIS.
But can they answer the most important question of all: How did it make you feel?
* Ethel and Julius Rosenberg were innocent. But that is a post for another time.
Florida’s Governor (“ I don’t believe in Covid or Global Warming so how did I not get elected president?”) has announced the closure of State Offices on Thursday July 3 as well. So you can enjoy a long weekend celebrating American exceptionalism (like defunding HIV treatment in Africa!! USA all the way. Let people get AIDS every day!).
What a guy. Just don’t use the term “global warming” if you’re a state employee or you will find yourself Trumped.
The Gov is term limited. He has a year left. Perhaps there’s an animal shelter he can defund before he leaves. Or some low income food for the elderly programs he can shutter. Or some children of immigrants he can cuff in front of their class and have their friends loudly mock them for being foreigners before taking them out of kindergarten and to a concentration camp in the Everglades. The kind of things we now want America to be known for. Enough of that nonsense of feeding hungry children and innovating health care to end things like Smallpox.
You know, the kind of stuff it takes to run for the presidency.
BEARS
Summer time leads to fall and that’s the best time to tune into the Bear Cams of Katmai National Park in Alaska and watch Brown bears peacefully feed on the salmon run until the current administration approves of oil drilling at the Katmai falls.
Check it out here. This is our favorite on line activity (other than betting against the Marlins).
Update : In response to our snarky riff on the Problem Solving Judge, we had THE PROBLEM SOLVER spoon it right back to us, proving that she’s the right judge for the job.
Margie Verde-Yanez
Personally we think she should keep the title as is. Why not have a problem solving judge in an age when we have so many problems that need to be solved?
Here's your winners and losers, judge-wise. Pretty much all of the administrative judges from the prior administration are O U T out. So much for competence, as opposed to political payback being the deciding factor.
Take a look at the new lineup, and if you are a long time and careful reader of the blog, what title immediately would catch Rumpole's eye? The answer is below.
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SO....we cannot resist. There is a Chief "Problem Solving" Judge? Really? Because our well known view is that Judges are problems, and cause more than they solve (and this has nothing to do with the current "problem solver").
How does this work?
Hmm...I'm having a problem with solving Fermat's Last Theorem. What to do? Oh, wait! I know, I'll call the Problem Solving Judge.
Or is it like Dear Abby?
Dear Problem Solving Judge, I'm having a problem with my mother-in-law. She doesn't like my black beans and rice. But my husband tells me that I make better moros than his mother. My mother-in-law is now coming over every day to watch me make dinner. I can't think of anything to do other than cook a second dinner once she leaves. Also, I am having problems filing in probate. Can you help?
Cuban Cook & Probate Lawyer.
There is just so much here. Sometimes the blog-gods are just too generous to a humble blogger hacking away trying to post decent content. Days of draught and endless re-writes of posts trying to find something to say are rewarded when we learn there is a Chief Problem Solving Judge.
Look! In The Courtroom. It's Justice Roberts...It's Justice Cardozo, NO It's the PROBLEM SOLVING JUDGE
Yes, it's PROBLEM SOLVING JUDGE, strange visitor from another jurisdiction, who came to Miami with powers and abilities far beyond those of mortal judges. PROBLEM SOLVING JUDGE, who can change the course of mighty rivers feeding the Everglades with an opinion, stop US steel from being sold with a simple injunction. And who, disguised as Clark Kent, mild-mannered Judge in a great metropolitan courthouse, fights a never-ending battle for truth, justice and no more continuances.
Ever want to take your favourite Judge, or prosecutor, or if you are a judge or prosecutor, your favourite defense attorney, and just pull the rip cord?
Now you can!
I Fly has opened up down the street from the REGJB (across from the new complex just over the bridge). Our little neighborhood is changing from small houses converted to law offices by defense attorneys in the 1970s (when you could take cash as a fee without risking indictment), into a touristy/shopping mecca.
This is how we imagine the tour bus script would read:
"And on your left is the Miami criminal courthouse, the scene of many lurid murder trials and drug trafficking trials straight out of Miami Vice. And as we pass the courthouse, on your left is the Dade County State Attorney's Office, staffed by lawyers who are very good at stating 'victim wants max' and who recently employed an experienced supervisor who withheld evidence in a murder case and then lied about it in court under oath. Their offices are called the Graham building named after Philip Graham, a former publisher of the Washington Post. Most prosecutors would tell you that the building is named after former Florida Senator Bob Graham, but they would be wrong.
Just down the street past the State Attorney's Office is the Public Defender's Office, and the interesting story about that is that their offices used to be the Miami Dade Police Department's Offices. And across from all of this is the Jackson Hospital Medical Complex where many a lawyer or judge has gone for medical assistance after a rough day in court."
So now after a hard day in court, you can go across the street, throw down a few at the bougee bar on the river (the Marine Bar it is not), and then go skydiving.
Have fun!
Bomb Damage Assessment.
Jaws was released 50 years ago today. It was, in our memory and experience, the first summer blockbuster movie.
People have their favourite lines, like "you're gonna need a bigger boat" said by Roy Scheider when he first sees the shark.
But in our humble opinion Robert Shaw as Quint stole the movie. Many point to Quint's Indianapolis speech as their favorite. "You know the thing about a shark is that he has lifeless eyes, black eyes, like a dolls eyes... I'll never put on a lifejacket again. So eleven hundred men went into water. Three hundred and sixteen come out, the sharks took the rest. June the 29, 1945..."
But this scene and his speech is our favorite. "This shark. Swallow ya whole. A little shakin, a little tenderizin and down you go...I'll find him for three. But I'll catch him and kill him for ten..."
Robert Shaw was just an amazing actor.
Your Florida Panthers won the Stanley Cup for the second year in a row. And it was the third year in a row they made the Stanley Cup finals. Quite and achievement. Time to start talking dynasty.
Here's how it played out in Miami.
1: The Panthers won the championship.
2: I thought college football was over.
1: No. The Panthers. Our hockey team.
2: Miami doesn't have a hockey team.
1: Yes we do. They won the Stanley Cup two years in a row now.
2: Oh. Well, let me know next year when they are in the finals. And you know what else? I'd buy Heat tickets if the NBA moved Wembanyama and Cooper Flagg to the Heat.
Meanwhile the US Supreme Court upheld a Tennessee law banning medical treatment for Transgender youth.
From the opinion:
We hold today what everyone already knows. Transgender people are not entitled to protections under the 14th amendment. American exceptionalism says so and drives this conclusion. We are never so strong as when we ban those of us who are different. Transgenderism is a new phenomenon which can be traced to Hillary Clinton's lost emails and Hunter Biden's laptop. And don't discount the stealing of the 2020 election. There aren't any Israeli pilots bombing Iran who are transgender and there shouldn't be any transgender people in the US getting any medical care. They should straighten up (pun intended) and fly right if they want to be accepted into American society which was founded on the principle that we are a Christian nation that does not tolerate differences. Differences make us weaker. One race. One People. Two sexes. Thats it. That's what makes America great. The Law is constitutional and we invite other states to ban these democratic inspired attacks on our president and society. Arbeit Macht Frei.
Tuesday Update: Simply because the VIX (the stock market "fear index") shot up nearly three points this afternoon to over 21, we have a sneaking suspicion that the President has ordered the US Airforce to destroy the Iranian Nuclear facility at Fordo buried deep underground. Only the US has aircraft (B1 and B2 bombers) capable of delivering the 30,000 pound "bunker buster" bomb. With the VIX shooting up, we think the order has been given. We shall see.
Attention Panther fans. It’s almost time. On Tuesday night your Florida Panthers will be playing at home to win the Stanley Cup. Now is the time to pay an outrageously obscene price for two tickets. Go to Sammy’s Steakhouse to be seen and then show up midway in the second period loudly proclaiming your undying loyalty to the Panthers. If the Panthers are behind by 3 you can unobtrusively slip out between the second and third periods.
CIVIL PROTESTS
What is the appropriate response if you’re stopped at a light in your car and some protestors walk in front of you and try and prevent you from driving away?
In LA this driver ran over the woman.
I’mWe have the answers, in another edition of one of our more popular features.
Q: Rump what happened Thursday?
A: Thursday was a normal day in the USA and the world. Israel bombed Iran and President Trump threatened similar actions to Los Angeles. A District Court Judge ruled the President could not usurp the Governor's control of the National Guard Thursday afternoon. By Thursday evening an appellate court temporarily reversed that ruling. And during the day a Boeing Dreamliner crashed in India shortly after takeoff killing everyone on board except one guy in seat 11A who was able to open the emergency exit and walk out of the crash with a few scratches.
Q: Is California really that bad?
A: Yes, it's bad. The Marines were preparing to engage a group of rowdy first graders who were refusing to take nap time. Trump ordered the Airborne to prepare for a "Normandy style drop" into LA to stop protestors from making fun of him, and artillery was brought into to stop the ACLU from criticizing the President. Oh yeah, an impertinent US Senator from California asked a question at a press conference and was wrestled to the ground by law enforcement. The House then voted along party lines to pass the "No Questions At Press Conferences" bill later in the day.
Q: What about our Courthouse?
A: The Dade State Attorney's Office kept their streak of 183 days of asking for a maximum sentence based on the victim's wishes intact. "Just because a bad check was for twenty dollars doesn't mean a lengthy prison sentence to maintain law and order is not called for. Especially when the defendant also smokes marijuana." There was also still no acknowledgement that the office employed a cabal of prosecutors led by Michael Von Zamft who lied to courts on murder cases.
Q: What exactly did Israel do?
A: This is complicated. In military terms they bombed the crap out of Iran, killing the top ranks of the Iranian Military leadership (motto "Stronger than the French Army was in 1939") and also bombing several airbases, and uranium enrichment sites.
Q: What does it mean to enrich uranium?
A: Well, it doesn't mean buying it shares of Nivida. It means refining the purity of uranium so it can be used in a nuclear weapon. For civilian reactor purposes for energy, uranium needs to be enriched to 6%. For a military bomb it needs to be enriched over 60%.
Q: So can Iran now make a nuclear weapon?
A: Probably. Israel did not strike the Fordo facility which is where the Iranians have the centrifuges to enrich uranium to weapons grade. The Fordo facilities are buried deep within a mountain and Israel is not known to have a "bunker buster" type bomb that the US has. Trump wanted to sell them some, but Musk fired the guys who keep track of them and no one can find our bunker buster bombs at the moment.
Q: What did our President say?
A: In a clear and concise response to the attack he condemned it and supported it, saying that Israel shouldn't do it, but that Iran brought it on themselves and Israel should do it. Many world leaders said that by now they were not surprised by the President's remarks and expected them.
Q: So what is Israel going to do?
A: They have a few options. They can bomb the Fordo facility's entrance and cave in some of the tunnels, essentially blocking access to the facility. They can also bomb the power plants that provide electricity to the facility. Because Iran's defenses have been so degraded, they could also land a commando strike force to enter the facility, go inside of it, and leave explosives, and then blow it up from the inside.
Q: Where is the Fordo facility?
A: Just outside the holy city of Qom.
Q: Why do they call it the holy city of Qom?
A: No one really knows. People just started calling it that several years ago and the name sort of stuck.
Q: How do you feel about things?
A: Pretty good. The Marines will have their hands full with the first graders who have been preparing water balloons and mocking the Marines on IG daring them to start something and calling their moms ugly. LA winds and fires will degrade the ability of Airborne to drop on LA. Although the ACLU doesn't have offices designed to withstand artillery. Israel is doing a good job with Iran. And by now everyone expects the Dade SAO to ask for the MAX on every case. So as we said at the start, Thursday was just a normal day in the world in 2025.
Brian Wilson burst on to the music scene in the 1960s like a supernova. He wrote about surfing in Surfing USA (1963) although he never surfed. He wrote about the happiness of life in Good Vibrations (1966) although he spent his childhood being terrorized by his father.
He wrote God Only Knows in 1966 and Paul McCartney called it the greatest song ever written.
He wrote Sloop John B and Wouldn’t It Be Nice in 1966 making 1966 his Annus Mirabilis.
In My Room (1963), Don’t Worry Baby (1964), I Get Around (1964), California Girls (1965) made the 1960s with the Beach Boys album Pet Sounds his miraculous decade.
Brian Wilson was a true music genius and authentically American- much like Chuck Berry - whose Sweet Sixteen Wilson “borrowed” for the rhythm and tempo of Surfin USA.
Brian Wilson died Wednesday at age 82. We will not see his genius again. The Beach Boys and Brian Wilson recall a time of innocence when catching a wave in California was what being a teenager in the USA was about - although he wrote California Girls after his first acid trip and hours of wallowing in his room with his pillow over his face consumed with self doubt about the tune he could not get out of his head.
Authentically telling the story of wholesome American teenagers while using and abusing drugs. A musical genius who suffered with drug abuse and mental illness for years. Successful. Creative. Mad. A genius. He was all of that and more.
He was authentic and unique and a uniquely American musical genius.
Enjoy the greatest song ever written.
Update Protests have occurred overnight in several other cities including a sit-in at Trump tower in NYC , and peaceful protests in Dallas and San Francisco. If any group wishes to organize a PEACEFUL protest in Miami to show solidarity with those in Los Angeles being threatened with the US military on US soil ( in violation of the Posse Comitatus Act of 1878) please email us and we will publicize the protest. This being Miami, expect that most people will show up towards the end- taking a few selfies before leaving- so long as they can find parking for their Tesla Truck, and it does not interfere with their dinner reservations at Sunny’s Steakhouse (which is really good btw and a resy is hard to nab ).
Here's a real leader. This is what we need. Governor Newsome of California. Well done.
And if he gets arrested, we got his back. Pro bono (words we generally try and not utter).
The whole interview is worth watching. But is you want to hear Newsome call out the administration and dare them to arrest him, scroll to 7 minutes and enjoy.
This just got very interesting very fast.
elonmusk (@Elon Musk) posted: Time to drop the really big bomb:
@realDonaldTrump is in the Epstein files. That is the real reason they have not been made public.
Have a nice day, DJT! https://x.com/elonmusk/status/
Was there any doubt that this bromance was destined to get ugly?
Update:
The Empire Strikes Back:
Your Stanley Cup Champion Florida Panthers are in the Stanley Cup Finals again in a rematch against the Edmonton Oilers. However unlike last year, if there is a game seven it will not be in Miami. That means as Miami fans it’s almost time to start paying attention to the finals.
A game six appearance at the start of the third period, loudly proclaiming your undying loyalty to the Panthers is the typical Miami front running fan play. Until then go about your business.
Speaking of loyal Miami fans who stick with their teams through good times and bad- a record 137 of you showed up for the Marlins - Rockies game this week.
137 fans in paid attendance. The Dodgers average nearly 45,000 per game. The Mets average 42,000 fans per game. And 137 people in Miami couldn’t find anything better to do then go to the baseball game earlier this week. What a great city this is.
Update : from the comments
I am a County Court Criminal Judge who over the years has worked with Mr. Solis. Solid. Strong. Sincere. Sensible. Social. That's Mr. Solis. The reaper took a trooper. Sad.
We received word earlier this week that Helmuth Solis was hospitalized and now sadly we report that he passed away. Helmuth was a former ASA who was widely respected and liked and was currently in private practice in a partnership. We did not know him well but will post some of the comments and remembrances in the comments section on the front of the blog as we receive them.
He was way too young to lose his life. We are informed this was a tragic accident of some sort and it reminds yet once again of the fragility of life and the importance of understanding the gift of life and repaying it by living in grace and being kind.
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Hello, my name is Dana and I am Paul Donnelly's partner in life. I hope I'm not overstepping any boundaries or rules by posting on this legal forum. I just received Paul's phone from the courthouse and wanted to post information regarding his Celebration of Life this coming Monday, June 2, 2025 @ 10:00 am.
The service is at Dignity Memorial's Forest Lawn Funeral home 2401 Davie Road, Davie, FL 33317.
Dodger`s announcer Red Barber had a bleeding ulcer and could not serve as the lead Dodgers broadcaster.
The Dodgers still had Barber’s partner, Connie Desmond, but they needed another announcer, so Dodgers GM Branch Rickey went out to find a suitable addition to the Dodgers broadcast team and settled on Ernie Harwell.The REGJB's very own retired Judge Jon Colby has made the news with his impassioned advocacy for the Menedez brothers. If you did not know, Judge Colby raises therapy dogs (Grace is the current one) and takes them to hospitals, nursing homes, and ...prisons, where he not only met Sirhan Sirhan (who fell on to the floor crying when allowed to pet Grace) but got to know the Menendez brothers and testified at their re-sentencing hearing.
Hardened criminals aren't the only ones who gain perspective and grace with age. Sometimes "tough" Judges do as well.
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| Doing great things...and allowing a retired judge to tag along. |
A retired tough-on-crime judge has become a surprising advocate for allowing Erik and Lyle Menendez to be released on parole after the shotgun murders of their parents more than three decades ago. And it was all because of his beloved golden retrievers.
Ex-Miami criminal court judge Jonathan T. Colby has visited the brothers numerous times in prison in the last 10 years, accompanied by his pups, as part of an outreach program that uses dogs to soften the hearts of hardened killers.
The most iconic sports photograph?
May 25 1965. Neil Leifer a 22-year-old photographer sent by Sports Illustrated to cover the fight in Lewiston, Maine captured the moment. Round one. Ali hit Liston with a short right in their rematch from when Ali won the title from Liston in Miami Beach. Because of Liston's mob-ties and Ali's speed, many didn't see the punch and called it "the phantom punch" and opined that Liston took a dive. He did not. Ali put him down.
The photo didn’t even make the cover.
Look closely between Ali’s legs. Senior Sports Illustrated photographer Herb Scharfman can be seen holding his camera. In a recent interview Lefier said his colleague had his choice of seats ringside and took the wrong one.
If you watch the video of the knockdown you can barely see this moment. Ali kept moving and swinging his arms. Leifer caught the moment with milliseconds to spare.
Remarkable.
Happy Memorial Day.
We did not know Paul well, but he has been described to us as universally well-liked and respected. A former Dade PD, he had a great sense of humor and was a devoted lawyer to his clients. He passed away un-expectedly Friday morning. It has been reported his medical emergency was either before, during or after a sentencing proceeding before Judge Becerra.
This is not our normal, upbeat Labor Day -Holiday Weekend post.
Instead, the loss of a beloved colleague once again reminds us of the fragility and preciousness of life. We take so much for granted, and yet our time on this earth is unknown to all but our maker. It may sound corny and gratuitous but take this holiday weekend and spend time with friends and loved ones. Put down the depo notes or the brief and do something you have been putting off. A walk with your life partner; brunch with your parents; a movie with your kids; a friends night out.
Enjoy this life we have been given and most importantly take good care of yourself. If you haven't been to your doctor for an annual physical, go schedule one. At almost any age you should be able to run a mile without stopping, absent physical limitations. Try some pushups and sit-ups every morning. Have a big bowl of fruit for breakfast. If the stress of our life is getting to you try learning mediation. TM is a great program and something that has worked for us for well over two decades.
Take care of yourself and cherish others in your life. Do good. Feel good. Be good to yourself and others. Life isn't that hard when you boil it down to the simple things that are the essence of living in grace and gratitude.
We hope the grief of the loss of Paul by his loved ones will be eased by the comments and memories that our readers will contribute this weekend.
BTW DOM and I agreed to both do posts in memory of Paul.
Every day for the next ten days is going to be the same backwards.
5/20/25
5/21/25
5/22/25
5/23/25
5/24/25
5/25/25
5/26/25
5/27/25
5/28/25
5/29/25
Seems like a good reason for a continuance.
Of course, if you think about the things going on, every day since last November has seemed backwards.
Take for example our brilliant Homeland Security Director - Kristi Noem She was asked during senate testimony by Senator Maggie Hassan (D-NH) what Habeas Corpus is. The genius scholar who is entrusted with securing the safety of our country responded "Habeas corpus is a constitutional right that the president has to be able to remove people from this country….duh”
(We added the duh)
In other words she pretty much got it backwards.
Meanwhile in the comments of the last post, lots of chatter about a new judge inviting a disgraced lawyer/prosecutor to her investiture.
The Supreme Court will take up the issue of whether your favorite federal judge can issue a nationwide injunction. So just speaking hypothetically, if the Government decided to round up Japanese Americans and place them in internment camps, could a Judge in Miami stop the Feds from doing it in California? Or would the judge’s order just extend to Hialeah?
The backdrop to this issue is even juicier: on day one of his reign of terror, the current president signed an executive order ending birthright citizenship. Lawyers filed motions arguing that the plain language of the amendment clearly conferred citizenship to anyone born in the United States. Plus, they argued, a long line of cases held the same thing and since the cases were not about abortion, they were accorded precedential value. District Court Judges who had no illusions about being elevated to their circuit court with this president, who were assigned the case issued nationwide injunctions.
But now there is serious consideration being given to the argument that the 14th Amendment was about slavery and applied to granting slaves citizenship in the state they were born in. Congress did not intend to extend the right of citizenship to the children of foreign nationals who just happened to be born while passing through Kennedy International Airport.
So before we weigh in, what say you?
Here is the relevant portion of the 14th Amendment for you robed readers who don’t do your own legal research:
All persons born or naturalized in the United States, and subject to the jurisdiction thereof, are citizens of the United States and of the State wherein they reside
UPDATE: BEST LINES OF THE DAY:
Chicago produced a Pope before it produced a quarterback who threw for 4,000 yards.
And this
Pope Leo was picked in two days. Shedeur Sanders was picked in three.
We have a Pope AND ....... drumroll please....
HE'S AN AMERICAN
WE HAVE AN AMERICAN POPE
USA ALL THE WAY
CARDINAL ROBERT FRANCIS PREVOST IS OUR NEW POPE
Wednesday update: The Conclave will begin today. There will be at least one vote. The rules require four votes a day but the Conclave doesn’t start until 4:30 pm Rome time. And Uber Eats - the Vatican/Conclave division- will be standing by- Pepe’s Mexican and Sakura Sushi are rumored to be favorites amongst the Cardinals. 133 Cardinals are voting - the most in Papal history. Keep an eye on the Italian Cardinal and the Cardinal from the Philippines as early favorites. But it’s all a mystery shrouded in secrecy and tradition and who doesn’t love that?
Our favorite Conclave witticism? It is said a Pope walks into a Conclave and leaves a Cardinal. Think about it.
Time for our mailbag.
A reader asks
You sometimes write, Rump, that you have "robed readers". I have a question for any judge who cares to respond, or anyone who knows: What on earth causes judges to arrive late to their calendar? It is the rule, rather than the exception. Taxpayers are funding correction staff, clerks, calendar clerks, ASAs and PDs to sit and wait. Civilians sit and wait. Its an ungodly waste of time and money. I cannot imagine the judges routinely have pressing business at 9AM. How is this anything other than an abuse of power? On campaigns for their jobs, they should be confronted with how frequently they start their job on time.
The FACDL awards banquet is Saturday night. Of course we were neither invited, nor will we attend. We do not join organizations that would have us.
There is a very deserving list of honorees and we post them in the spirit of pro bono publico:
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Daisy Serrano should be so proud to win the Marcia Cooke award. A great award named after a great woman - and Daisy is so deserving of this recognition.
And Michele Borchew has been everywhere the last couple of years kicking the ass of the Dade SAO ASAs. Her award is well deserved.
And it is nice to see Regional Counsel lawyers win the Rodney Thaxton Against All Odds Award. Rodney was someone we practiced with. He was committed to Indigent Defense and the RC3 lawyers did a great job in a case with truly awful facts.
Rothman has been doing it as good as anyone and many times better for a long long time.
Did we miss anyone? Once again no one wins The Rumpole award for misanthropic behavior while winning cases. Maybe someday.
Well done everyone.
Well done indeed.
If it is Friday in America 2025
Then the president is seeking to defund NPR and PBS.
Why does he hate big bird and the Cookie Monster ?
By now word has spread through the Miami legal community that a longtime and well known law professor at FIU has been relieved of his position pending a review by FIU of allegations by a law student that he inappropriately displayed a picture or pictures of an animal with its genitalia exposed. The Herald ran an article and we allowed comments about it in the prior post.
We do not need to pile on - especially since there has been no determination of guilt- only an allegation. Someone’s reputation is at stake and we take that seriously. We will be especially strict with the comments so kindly act accordingly. We get it is an issue. We just have to thread a needle here.
Oy. Or as we say in Miami - ay dios mio.
Meanwhile DOM has all the news about the state of Florida giving Judge Williams the middle finger and not enforcing or respecting her injunction to stop State law enforcement officers from arresting immigrants. We wouldn’t mess with Judge Williams if we were you.
Check it out here
A standing O is not newsworthy unless it occurs in the Supreme Court and all 9 justices join in.
That was the scene on Monday as assistant solicitor general Edwin S Kneedler presented his 160th argument on behalf of the United States. After he finished CJ Roberts called him back to the podium to recognize his achievement and note that it was Kneedler’s last argument. From The NY Times:
You have just presented your 160th argument before this court, and I understand it is intended to be your last,” the chief justice told the lawyer, Edwin S. Kneedler, who is retiring as a deputy solicitor general. “That is the record for modern times.
…
Kannon Shanmugam, a veteran Supreme Court lawyer, said it was “one of the most electric moments I’ve ever seen in the courtroom.”
The tribute to Mr. Kneedler’s candor and integrity came against the backdrop of a different kind of courtroom behavior. In the early months of the second Trump administration, its lawyers have been accused of gamesmanship, dishonesty and defiance, and have been fired for providing frank answers to judges.Mr. Kneedler presented a different model, former colleagues said.“Ed is the embodiment of the government lawyer ideal — one whose duty of candor to the court and interest in doing justice, not just winning a case, always carried the day,” said Gregory G. Garre, who served as solicitor general under President George W. Bush
We won’t see a lawyer like him representing the United States again for several years sadly. In other news over 100 lawyers in the DOJ civil rights division have resigned rather than represent the division’s new mandate of making sure men don’t compete in women’s sports. Yes we are not making that up. The sections that enforce anti-discrimination laws and prosecute police brutality have been eviscerated. But the anti trans section is fully staffed and working hard.
Don’t believe us? Check this out
And from the Washington Post:
In one of her first acts, Dhillon changed the mission statements for many of division offices to align with Trump executive orders with titles such as “Ending Radical Indoctrination in K-12 Schooling,” “Keeping Men Out of Women’s Sports” and “Eradicating Anti-Christian Bias.”
Tuesday update we were right - Carney won and will continue to be Canada's PM.
In other news We seem to have lost all our Miami Heat fans as the Cleveland Cavs who were up by as much as 60 nipped out a win at the end and CRUSHED your Miami Heat by ( wait for it ) 55 points- 138-83. Where are all the front running Miami Heat fans? Busy with other things we guess. We had the Cavs minus 50 so we won our bet hahahahaha. ( with apologies to Judge Colodny who is a true Heat fan through good times and bad).
It’s elections day…in 🇨🇦 Canada - our fearless neighbor to the north who refuses to back down to a bully. The last bastion of democracy in North America.
Who do you want to win? PM Mark Carney- proudly Canada Strong and anti- he who must not be named; vs challenger Pierre Poilievre.
Rumple predicts a resounding victory for the PM.
Thoughts on Colorado QB Shedeur Sanders dropping to the fifth round? Good scouting or racism or just fear of the whole Sanders circus coming to town?
You got about two months to try cases before judges and prosecutors take their summer sabbatical.
Problems at the SAO are not going away. We see the office openly mocked in court - comments about how they cannot be trusted just go unchallenged. As we have always said: it takes a lifetime to build a reputation and about one minute to lose it.
And speaking of Elections the Cardinals in Rome will conclave starting May 7 and will be under lock and key with no electronics until the leader says HABEMUS PAPAM We have a pope. Every Cardinal under 80 may vote. And t includesCavs c Tony LaRussa and Albert Pujols (bad baseball joke). No truth to the rumors that even without electronics the Cardinals will have access to the finals of the Bachelor and be able to stream and catch up on White Lotus.
US Secretary of Defense Pete Hegseth has a highly classified chat group about the conclave. Jesenia Gonzalez who sells hot dogs from a cart outside the pentagon and is on the chat group says the Cardinals will take more than the two days they took in 2005 and 2013 as Pope Francis appointed a lot of cardinals in places that never had one - like Rwanda, Haiti and Myanmar 🇲🇲 so many Cardinals don’t know each other. That Vatican happy hour this Thursday is a can’t miss event.
Conclaves fascinate us
Happy Monday.
It's draft day. While the NY Mets are riding a 7-game wining streak (substantially enhancing our Draft Kings Account), and having swept two series at home this week, and starting the season 12-1 at home for the best start in Mets history, we turn our attention briefly to the NFL for draft weekend starting tonight.
1 Titans - The consensus pick is Miami QB Cam Ward.
2 Browns- Here is our first critique. The Browns- perhaps the worst drafting team in all of professional sports- and going to blow it again. They are going to pick Travis Hunter- the Heisman Award winning two-way CB/WR from Colorado. The Browns GM called Hunter the "Ohtani of Football" and Hunter will be a good-great player, but follow us on this. The Browns just re-signed Myles Garrett to an enormous contract. Penn State OLB Abdul Carter is perhaps the best pure football player in the draft. If the Browns were able to line up Carter opposite Garrett, they would automatically have the best pass rush in the league for the next five years, and prevent teams from double-teaming Garrett. Drafting Carter would give the Browns the best player in the draft and exponentially expand the value of Garrett. But they will draft Hunter.
3 Giants - They race to the podium and grab Carter.
4 Cheaters - The consensus pick is OT Will Campbell from LSU. Having got their QB last year, now they need to protect him. But why not Ashton Jeanty, RB from Boise State? Nothing opens up the passing game then a generational talent at RB. Jeanty would be our pick- there's plenty of O linemen in rounds 2-7.
5. Jax Jags- Hard to see Jeanty falling past the Jags for the reasons above. If the Cheaters grab him, then Jax takes Campbell.
6 Raiders- No one is sadder about losing Jeanty then new Raiders coach Pete Carrol. He loves building a team with a RB. Don't discount Vegas trading up with the Cheaters. If not, then consensus pick is OT Armand Membou...but Rumpole says Arizona WR Tetairoa McMillan is a Raiders type of player- and new QB Geno Smith would love to be throwing to him. Interesting fact- McMillan is going to be the first player in the NFL named Tetairoa. How about that nugget?
7. J..E...T..S. Jets Jets Jets. For the second year in a row the Jets grab a great Ol in round 1, choosing Kelvin Banks JR from Texas. Having lost RT Morgan Moses in FA, the Jets have this wild idea that teams who win Super Bowls start with dominating OL and DL lines like...um....the Eagles have done.
8. Carolina Panthers. Let us tell you who they are NOT taking. Shedeur Sanders. Instead the Panthers grab OLB Jalon Walker from Georgia.
9. New Orleans Saints. Now Sanders is in play. Rumpole says DO NOT DO IT. He is not a first round talent. the choice is between Sanders and Mason Graham, DT Michigan. They should draft Graham (see comments about the Jets and Eagles above), but we think they just might pull the trigger on Shedeur.
10. Da Bears. This is easy. They grab the best TE in the draft for their new QB- Tyler Warren from Penn State.
11. San Fran. Now things get tricky. There's a lot of choices. We think the 49ers go for Mykel Williams, DE Georgia if none of the other defensive players have fallen to them.
12. Cowboys. Talk about teams that have lately blow the draft, the Cowboys are right up there. They wanted Arizona WR Tetairoa McMillan, but he's gone. They are a candidate to trade with the Cheaters to grab Jeanty, which would be a great trade for them. But assuming they stand pat and ignore the urge to draft the punter from North Dakoata State, then it's either WR Luther Burden III from Missouri, or one of the two top cornerbacks -Jahdae Brown from Texas or Will Johnson from Michigan.
13.YOUR Miami Dolphins. If the Cowpokes don't draft a CB then the Fins grab Jahdae Brown from Texas which is the player they have targeted. If the Cowpokes take Brown, then the Fins most likely will take Johnson, but they will consider trading down or two of the Big Defensive Tackles on the board- Derrick Harmon from Oregon or Shemar Stewart from Texas A & M. Our choice- the big guy from Oregon to anchor the defensive line for the next five years.
We may...may...live blog the draft. Tune in and see.
Oh, and Shedeur Sanders? He falls past the Steelers at 21 ( he is not a Mike Tomlin type of player) and out of the first Round to the NY Giants in Round Two. The Steelers trade out of the first round (they currently do not have a 2nd round pick) and grab their QB in the second round UNLESS DT Derrick Harmon is still on the board. Then they grab him as he IS a Tomlin type player.
Have fun and enjoy the draft.
Three more prosecutors in the SDNY chose honor over dishonor and courage over obsequiousness. This is their letter. This is what real lawyers with backbones do. They don’t back down to darkness and they don’t cower to bullies. We need more lawyers like themv.
we resign by Anonymous PbHV4H on Scribd
The Pope has died one day after courageously meeting the faithful for Easter. He also met with VP JD ( stands for “just dumb”?) Vance earlier this week prompting many Rumpole acolytes to ask on social media if the VP can go meet Putin?
Longtime and careful readers of the Blog know there is nothing that fascinates us more than the ritual and tradition after a Pope goes to meet his maker. The public destruction of his Fisherman’s Ring, the Conclave (literally meaning “with key”) of Cardinals - no less intriguing than the recent conclave of judges here in Miami to elect their next Chief Judge - and the politicking for the office - it all fascinates us.
But not lost in this was that Francis was a good man and a very good Pope. He brought the conversation of gay and trans people into the forefront of the Church ( so he wasn’t MAGA) and made the Papacy more open and less regal. For example his casket will be a simple wood one lined with zinc. Previous Popes were interred in an elaborate three casket creation. He will be first Pope in recent memory to have his body held not in the Basilica but in a smaller Church where he often prayed.
Keep turned as we will use our extensive contacts to get the latest on which Cardinals (you have to be under 90 to vote) are the front runners.
UPDATED Below with the Parable of the Bondi
Good Friday is many things to many people of many religions. At its core, it is the crucifixion of Jesus and the attending chaos of the times and people around him. Suicide, denial, a call upon the lord as to why he has forsaken Jesus; many things were occurring in turbulent times. Much like some legal proceedings today, where the government obstructs the process with endless challenges to jurisdiction, there were jurisdictional questions over the sentencing of Jesus.
Pontius Pilate questioned the sentencing of Jesus to death. When he learned that Jesus was from Gailee, he sent the matter to King Herod who was in Jerusalem celebrating Passover. Jesus refused to answer questions from Herod, who sent him back to Pilate, who opined that neither he nor Herod had found Jesus guilty of anything.
Pilate had Jesus whipped and then sought to release him, but the crowd - call them the Make Rome Great Again crowd MARGA- and as MARGA and similar crowds are want to do with itinerant alien carpenters, they demanded he be crucified.
Jesus was betrayed for 30 pieces of silver. He was mocked and jeered by Roman soldiers. And Jesus was adored, his body was taken by Joseph of Arimathea and wrapped and buried- only to be -as Christians believe- to rise again on Easter Sunday. As the Jews would say- "it was a whole mishegoss."
For Passover, Jews recite in their Seder that "We were strangers in the land of Egypt". For Good Friday through Easter Sunday, Jesus was forsaken, betrayed, ridiculed, and crucified for being different and for alluding that he may well be the messiah. When directly asked, Jesus responded mysteriously "You have said it, and in time you will see the Son of Man seated at the right hand of the almighty."
One might think that within the lessons of Passover and Easter is the simple proposition that the downtrodden- be them the slaves of Egypt, or the bedraggled man who was so hated, feared and loved- should be treated with dignity and respect. That we are never so tall as when we bend down to help the lowest amongst us. That the principles of the United States are that we welcome strangers in a strange land and give them the chance for life, liberty, and happiness.
No more. The alien carpenter is deported- no papers and no work permit. Those fleeing oppression in Central America are turned away at the border- slaves fleeing oppression are not welcome in this land of freedom. And in a final insult, the government now seeks to repudiate the 14 Amendment's grant of citizenship for those born here.
We turn our back on the poor, the oppressed, the small and weak seeking democracy and freedom. We mock aliens and immigrants like Roman soldiers who jeered Jesus. We sell out our neighbors to ICE like Judas for a few coins of silver. Our mobs chant for the deportation of those not like us, cheer their mistreatment and even their death- better dead then receiving the charity of our country. Given the choice, we have no doubt the MAGA crowd would support the crucifixion of their enemies. They already cheer the figurative crucifixions of those who are different. No more health funding for sick children; no more funding to prevent Aids in Africa. No more funding for educational institutions that do not teach the ideas of jingoism. The revocation of access to courts for lawyers who oppose them. Enemies perceived are mocked, fired, attacked, cursed, and all but literally stoned. The power of the government is turned on those who are different.
Do you have any doubt how Jesus would have treated a trans-teenager? And do you have any doubt how our government is treating trans-people?
All of this hate and violence and vitriol in the name of making this country great again?
And we thought the MAGA crowd believed this was a Christian nation. Only in the sense that that are doing to immigrants and MAGA enemies what Pilate, Herrod and the Romans did to Jesus.
Today it is a crime to help an immigrant.
Luke 10: 25-37
A man who was an expert in the law asked Jesus: “And who is my neighbor?”
Jesus said: “A man was going down from Jerusalem to Jericho, when he was attacked by robbers. They stripped him of his clothes, beat him and went away, leaving him half dead. A priest happened to be going down the same road, and when he saw the man, he passed by on the other side. But a Samaritan came where the man was; and when he saw him he bandaged his wounds, pouring on oil and wine. Then he put the man on his own donkey, brought him to an inn and took care of him. ‘Look after him,’ he said to the innkeeper, ‘and when I return, I will reimburse you for any extra expense you may have.’
“Which of these do you think was a neighbor to the man who fell into the hands of robbers?” Jesus asked.
The expert in the law replied, “The one who had mercy on him.”
Jesus told him, “Go and do likewise.”
Happy Easter.
THE PARABLE OF THE BONDI
And it came to pass that Bondi the legal expert asked Donald of Mar Galilee Lago "How can I recognize an American?"
Donald of Mar Galilee replied "A man was walking his daughter to kindergarten when they were beset upon by a mob who beat the man for being an alien."
"The mob were Americans" said the Bondi. "Yes", replied Donald of Mar Galilee.
"The mob made the little girl tear up her schoolbooks. Then a lawyer from the ACLU happened by and sheltered the man and his daughter and brought them to her school."
"The lawyer was not an American" said the Bondi. "Right again" said Donald of Mar Gailee.
"The teacher opened the door to give shelter to the little girl and her father, but the principal came and barred the girl from her school for being the child of an alien".
"The teacher is not an American" said the Bondi. "But the principal is".
"Correct again" said Donald of Mar Galilee.
"The man picked up his little girl who was crying to protect her from the mob who screamed at them and spit on them for being from a foreign country" said Donald of Mar Galilee.
"The mob was making America great again" said the Bondi.
"Go and do likewise and use all the powers of the lawyers at your command to do the same to the thousands of parents and children in this country who are not from here" said Donald of Galilee.
The Parable of the Bondi.
Proud to be an American these days are we?