JUSTICE BUILDING BLOG

WELCOME TO THE OFFICIAL RICHARD E GERSTEIN JUSTICE BUILDING BLOG. THIS BLOG IS DEDICATED TO JUSTICE BUILDING RUMOR, HUMOR, AND A DISCUSSION ABOUT AND BETWEEN THE JUDGES, LAWYERS AND THE DEDICATED SUPPORT STAFF, CLERKS, COURT REPORTERS, AND CORRECTIONAL OFFICERS WHO LABOR IN THE WORLD OF MIAMI'S CRIMINAL JUSTICE. POST YOUR COMMENTS, OR SEND RUMPOLE A PRIVATE EMAIL AT HOWARDROARK21@GMAIL.COM. Winner of the prestigious Cushing Left Anterior Descending Artery Award.

Wednesday, August 28, 2024

ARE YOU READY FOR SOME FOOTBALL

 Here we go.....its FOOTBALL 2024 

and you know what rhymes with 2024? MORE 

More football all the time. 

First up is our work famous, heart stopping, boat rocking, fame makin, viagra takin,  underdog pickin, shroom trippin..... SURVIVOR POOL!!!!

All your favourite players should be back...fake Alex Michaels emails us twice a day. 

You know the drill...send your picks to Fbpool12@gmail.com  before the kickoff.   We will have a special contest for the first Thursday night game. Everyone starts off with one pass- meaning they can skip one week. You can earn a second life or earn the right to pick one team you already have. 

TO SIGN UP  ( read carefully because we enforce this more harshly than a judge in civil court when a litigant is a day late answering interrogatories)  you MUST send an email to Fbpool12@gmail saying you are playing. If you send it to our regular email it is like a default. And not one of those meaningless clerk defaults. But a real default and you will have to show excusable neglect and a meritorious defense beyond "I am dumb and cannot follow directions". 


FANTASY FOOTBALL

Here is the sign up info- if we can fill the league, we will play. 

We think this is the sign up if not- email us and we will send an invite

https://football.fantasysports.yahoo.com/f1/589691/invitation?key=b9b0dc2f43723a12&soc_trk=lnk&ikey=6eab63acf1dd8396

Draft  is Tuesday Sept 3 8 pm subject to change if people want it. 

ARE YOU READY FOR SOME FOOTBALL? 

We are. 

It's been a long, hot summer. 


Monday, August 26, 2024

MILT HIRSCH'S CONSTITUTIONAL CALENDAR ..... & A POSTSCRIPT ON JASON BLOCH .....

 

THE CAPTAIN REPORTS:

MILT HIRSCH'S CONSTITUTIONAL CALENDAR .....

John Provoo passed away 23 years ago this week. Who is John Provoo you ask:

"In the weeks and months before December 7, 1941 – that “day that will live forever in infamy” – the plan was simple.  When the armies of Imperial Japan came sweeping through southeast Asia, the American forces based in the Philippines would fall back upon positions in and around Manilla Bay, there to await rescue by America’s Pacific Fleet.  The plan was simple because it had to be.  America’s military presence in that part of the South Pacific was inadequate for any purpose but tactical retreat, and Americans burdened by the Great Depression were in no mood to fund an expanded military presence on the far side of the globe.

In the wake of their surprise attack on Hawaii, the Japanese destroyed Clark Field, America’s airbase in the Philippines, as well as other military and naval installations in and around Manilla Bay.  The Pacific Fleet, which according to the plan was to rescue the American forces in the Philippines, had been sent to the bottom of Pearl Harbor.

American and allied forces fell back upon such positions as were available to them, chiefly upon a barren rock called Corregidor.  Bereft of supplies, bereft of reinforcements, bereft of hope, they held out for four full months, obliging the enemy to engage them until April 9, 1942.  The fate that awaited the souls who surrendered was reported in the American press as the “Bataan Death March.”

During and after the Death March one American soldier, John Provoo, formed an alliance with his Japanese captors.  He was given decent nutrition and sanitary living conditions.  In return, he acted as a guard and informer against his own comrades, and later even made radio broadcasts for Imperial Japan.

It was not until 1949 that the United States Department of Justice was prepared to go forward against Provoo on charges of treason and related crimes.  The delay was entirely understandable.  Provoo’s crimes, committed in 1942, were beyond the reach of the law until the war ended.  Even then, there were military, economic, and other claims on the nation’s post-war attention that took priority over the prosecution of Provoo.  And when prosecutors did begin to assemble their case, they had precious little to work with: most of the witnesses were dead, and many of the survivors were in far-off Japan or Australia.  

In the meantime, on September 5, 1946, Provoo had found the perfect hiding place: incredible as it seems, he had quietly reenlisted in the United States Army.  He was stationed at Ft. Meade, in Maryland.

In June of 1949, the Department of Justice arranged to have Provoo taken into custody at Ft. Meade; transported under guard to Fort Jay, Governors Island, New York; and ordered to accept an “undesirable discharge” from the Army.  He was then turned over to agents of the F.B.I. who arrested him for treason.  Provoo was tried in the Southern District of New York, convicted, and sentenced to life imprisonment.

Provoo’s lead counsel on appeal was George A. Spiegelberg.  Spiegelberg, the grandson of German-Jewish immigrants, was a Harvard Law grad; served prominently in World War II; and after the war was among the founders of the law firm that is today Fried, Frank .  He had little criminal-law experience, but when the Second Circuit appellate panel – an all-star team of Swan, Medina, and Harlan – asked him to undertake Provoo’s appeal, he agreed to do so on condition that he and his colleagues receive no compensation at all.  He would represent Provoo for principle, but not for money.  

On appeal, Spiegelberg had a powerful argument grounded in 18 U.S.C. 3238, which at that time provided that, “The trial of all offenses begun or committed . . . out of the jurisdiction of any particular state or district, shall be in the district where the offender is found.”  Provoo was “found” at Ft. Meade, in the District of Maryland.  His travel to New York was a contrivance of the Department of Justice.  It could not create venue.  In the words of the appellate court:

“We cannot blind our eyes to the fact that the real purpose in bringing [Provoo] to New York was to meet the wish of the Department of Justice to have him tried for treason under the indictment subsequently filed here.  Consequently we hold that the continuance of Provoo’s restraint in Ft. Meade . . . for the purpose of bringing him to New York for trial, was an apprehension for treason and that he was ‘found’ in Maryland within the meaning of the venue statute.”  United States v. Provoo, 214 F. 2d 531, 538 (2nd Cir. 1954).  

The Second Circuit’s opinion reversing Provoo’s conviction was dated August 27, 1954.  Of course the appellate ruling did not bar re-trial; on the contrary, it invited it.  On October 27, Provoo was indicted in the District of Maryland.  

The lawyers who represented him there dropped a bombshell: they moved to dismiss the charges against him on constitutional speedy trial grounds.  See Petition of Provoo, 17 F.R.D. 183 (D. Md. 1955).  In essence, the motion to dismiss claimed that the delay of approximately five years associated with trial and appeal in New York had prejudiced Provoo’s defense irremediably.  The motion identified defense witnesses who had died, and evidence that had become unavailable, in the intervening period.  

The resolution of the motion would turn in substantial part on the government’s reason for having Provoo transferred to New York for trial.  In the America of the 1950's, all television and radio networks were headquartered in New York City, as were several of the nation’s largest daily newspapers.  It was almost certainly the case that the prosecution’s real reason for trying to manufacture venue in New York was so that a notorious traitor could be tried and convicted before the largest possible audience.  

The Maryland case would proceed before U.S. District Judge Roszel C. Thomsen, who had been on the bench for no more than eight or nine months when the case came before him.  But what Judge Thomsen lacked in experience he made up for in fidelity to the Constitution.  To the unspoken argument that so vile a traitor as Provoo should not be permitted to go unwhipped of justice for a violation of his right to a speedy trial – a violation of the sort that the lay public refers to as a “technicality” – Judge Thomsen replied: “The offenses charged could not be more serious.  But it would be a poor tribute to [a fellow-soldier whom Provoo was accused of betraying] to deny to this defendant the rights for which [that fellow-soldier] gave his life.”  Petition of Provoo, 17 F.R.D. at 196.  He explained:

“It . . . appears that Provoo . . . was taken to New York in September, 1949, charged with treason, and held in custody for more than five years before being indicted and brought to trial in a district having jurisdiction to try the case.

“The government must have known that venue in New York was at least doubtful . . . yet the government caused Provoo to be taken under guard from Fort Meade to Fort Jay, for the supposed advantage of proceeding in New York rather than in Maryland.  It therefore appears that a large part of the long delay – at least five years – has been due to the deliberate choice of the government, exercised for a supposed advantage.

. . .

“. . .  The long periods of imprisonment have caused other prejudice to the defendant beside the deprivation of his freedom, with a capital charge hanging over him.  He has been handicapped in his ability to locate and keep in touch with possible witnesses.  But even more serious has been the effect on Provoo himself. . . .  His ability to cooperate with his counsel in preparing his defense, and to testify in his own behalf with respect to matters which occurred from 1942 to 1945, has obviously deteriorated during the years in prison.”  Id. at 195.  

The case was dismissed.  Provoo went free.  But his story doesn’t end there.

It ends with a small piece in a Honolulu newspaper – just a small piece down in the corner on the obituaries page.  It was dated August 28, 2001, exactly two weeks before the debacle of September 11, and it noted the quiet death of an 84-year-old Buddhist priest at Hilo Medical Center in Hawaii.  His name was John Provoo, and he was buried at Hawaii Veterans’ Cemetery. "

JASON BLOCH, POSTSCRIPT:

The Comments section from our last post was filled with a back-and-forth about Judge-Elect Jason Bloch. (To the educated reader it would appear that Jason or someone very close to him wrote many of the replies to the somewhat negative comments about his last stint on the bench, how he won the election this time, his net worth, how he earned that money, and on and on and on).

As Joe Friday liked to say "just the facts". So here are the actual facts:

Jason Bloch reported raising $13,300 for his campaign. He contributed (loaned his campaign) an additional $170,975. He spent $313,978 on his campaign. (I have not figured out how that is actually possible - he spent $129,703 more than he had in his campaign account. Maybe Judge Bloch can weigh in on that matter in the Comments section or privately email us).

His opponent, Bonita Jones-Peabody, raised $50,270 and loaned her campaign $80,025. She spent $90,790.

According to the publically available documents, Jason's net worth indicates he had about $68,000,000 as of December 31, 2023. How he acquired that wealth has also been the subject of debate in the comments. But, strictly for argument's sake, who cares. If Jason Bloch wants to serve the public as a judge, and if the people of Miami-Dade County choose to elect him, then why does it matter how much he is worth on paper, or how he acquired that money.  Certainly, his abilities on the bench are fair game, and he will once again be judged by the attorneys that appear before him over the next six years. But his net worth - sounds like just a little bit of jealousy out there.

As for past elections, Jason ran twice in contested elections for Circuit Court Judge. He spent 20 years working at the Miami-Dade County Attorney's office before being appointed to the bench by Governor Rick Scott in 2014.

Two years later, in 2016, he ran as the incumbent against challenger Marcia Del Rey. Bloch lost that election 52% - 48%.

In 2022, Bloch challenged incumbent Judge Oscar Rodriguez-Fonts. Bloch lost that contest 50.4% - 49.6% (a total of 262,589 votes were cast - Bloch lost by 1,851 votes).

Those are the facts.

CAPTAIN OUT .......
Captain4Justice@gmail.com



Wednesday, August 21, 2024

CONGRATS TO OUR THREE NEWLY ELECTED JUDGES; WE ALSO HAVE A RUN-OFF IN A FOURTH CONTEST .......

THE CAPTAIN REPORTS:

ELECTION CENTRAL - PRIMARY RESULTS .......

Congratulations are in order for three newly elected Judges. They will take office in the first week of January, 2025. In the fourth contest of the day, we have a runoff.

On Tuesday, August 20, 2024, voters went to the polls to elect four judges, two in the Circuit Court and two in the County Court. Of the 1.4 million registered voters in Miami-Dade County, 19.6% of voters cast ballots.

CIRCUIT COURT:

GROUP 8 

Former Judge Jason Bloch has been elected to a new six-year term on the bench. He bested his opponent Bonita Jones-Peabody convincingly, garnering 62% of the vote.

GROUP 29

In a much closer race, Heloiza Correa won a hard-fought contest over Cristobal David Padron. 

Heloiza Correa 129,525 (51.9%) 

Cristobal David Padron 120,178 (48.1%)


COUNTY COURT

GROUP 29

In this three-way contest that included former Judge Scott Janowitz, we have a runoff as no candidate received a majority of the vote. Here are the results:

Christopher Benjamin 98,069 (38.7%)

Alina Salines Restrepo 91,014     (35.9%)

Scott Janowitz         64,131 (25.3%) 

Benjamin and Restrepo will face off on November 5th in the General Election.

GROUP 31

In the closest race of the evening, Incumbent Judge Christopher Green held on to his seat squeaking by his opponent, Rita Maria Baez.

Christopher Green 126,770 (50.8%)

Rita Maria Baez 122,628 (49.2%)

In the most closely watched contest of the evening, Miami-Dade County will elect a Sheriff in November. This was as the result of a 2018 referendum in which 58% of Miami-Dade voters joined a statewide supermajority in approving a constitutional amendment requiring that the county join Florida’s 66 other counties in having an elected Sheriff.  Early on, you may recall that former Miami-Dade Police Director Freddy Ramirez was the odds-on favorite to win this election. But, he dropped out of the race last September following an attempted suicide.

In the Republican primary, Assistant Director of Investigative Services for the MDPD Rosie Cordero-Stutz, a 28-year veteran of the force, beat out Florida Highway Patrol PIO Joe Sanchez to win her primary. Cordero-Stutz collected 27,065 votes to Sanchez’s 24,685. Nine other candidates were also in that contest.

Cordero-Stutz will face off against the Democratic primary winner, Chief of Public Safety for Miami-Dade County James Reyes, as he collected 51,291 votes (46.0%). He beat three other candidates, with the closest one being Rickey Mitchell who had 23,365 votes (21.0%).

Finally, in our favorite named candidate contest, that goes to Pitchie “Peachy” Escarment. She ran for a seat on the Miami Gardens Council, Seat 5, At Large. Unfortunately for Peachy, you will not be able to address her as Council Member Escarment as she came in fifth place in a six-person race.

CAPTAIN OUT .......
Captain4Justice@gmail.com


FOR SALE

 For sale. Run down property with historic pedigree. 

Al Capone hung our here (not voluntarily) in 1931 when he was tried for perjury. 

Cash offers receive preference. Perfect knock down and location for a starter business. Inquire within. 


ODE TO A SKYSCRAPPER
Felix Unger 

 "777 they will call you
Towards heaven heaven heaven you will soar 
Only g-d can make a tree I grant you 
But only man can make a 40th floor"

Your new civil courthouse is nearing completion. 



Monday, August 19, 2024

ZENA DUNCAN HAS PASSED AWAY


 

This is awful and unexpected news to learn about the untimely death of a colleague who we have lost in the prime of her life. 

We did not know Ms. Duncan well. But we saw her in court as a fierce advocate for her clients, and someone who was well liked by judges, prosecutors and defense attorneys and who always appeared to have a smile on her face. As comments come in about her, we will post some on the blog to add to her memory from those who knew her best. 


LIPSTICK ON A _____?

 We kinda want to know more about this case. 

Especially the painting of the lipstick by the complaining witness on the face of the defendant she said broke her ribs. 

But you cannot have everything in life. 


Potts by Anonymous PbHV4H on Scribd

 

 GOING BIG TIME

Some judges aspire to make the NY Times or a thoughtful NPR report on their decision. Others write opinions hoping that it will be quoted favorably by the Supreme Court. 

Our Judge Hirsch made it big- the NY POST carried the story of the misbegotten sentencing last week when the excuse for a human made disparaging comments to the widow of the man he killed. 
We don't often approve of life without parole sentences. But sometimes they are appropriate. 






Thursday, August 15, 2024

NOT WINGING IT AND GOODBYE AMOS

 A woman caught nine years for stealing 1.5 million dollars in chicken wings. NY Times article here. 

Football season is coming. How do you like your wings? After much debate and a lifetime of experimentation we like non-sauced wings, salt and pepper, a little lemon and garlic, oven roasted. It produces a nice and juicy wing. Then we have our sauces- hot, BBQ, and ranch on the side for dipping. 



Famous Amos has passed away. 

We didn't love his cookies, but we loved him. 

In 1975 Wally Amos borrowed $25,000.00 from friends and opened a cookie store in Los Angeles. The rest was history.

Here's the deal. We are chocolate chip cookie afficionados and we prefer a thicker, soft baked cookie. Famous Amos's cookies are crisp and crunchy. Not for us- like a newly appointed 32-year-old circuit court DeSantis Drone who tells us how to try a case, having tried three of their own in private practice. 

But any man who devoted his life to the chocolate chip cookie ( and in his later years writing children's books and reading to them) is a guy we like. 


Wednesday, August 14, 2024

SUMMER READING LIST UPDATED

 On 8/12/1988 the best trial lawyer most of you have probably never heard of passed away, Edward Bennett Willimas. 

Do yourself a favor and read his biography The Man To See. Available on Amazon and wherever fine books are sold, 

We are reading 

Man's Search For Meaning. Viktor Frankle. 

How did we miss this? A holocaust survivor's memoir of finding life's purpose in the death camps. Moving. Deeply human. Stunning in its simple recitation of daily life in a concentration camp when life often hung on the barely discernable movement of a guard's finger. To the left was death; to the right was a chance at life. 

Deeply life affirming. Do not make our mistake and miss this life-changing book. 

Shattered Sword. The Untold Story of the Battle of Midway. Parshall & Tully, 

On May 4, 1942, off the coast of Midway, a small atoll in the Pacific, five minutes starting at 10:20 am would change the course of the war and history as dive bombers from the Enterprise sent all four Japanese carriers (Akagi, Kaga, Hiryu, and Soyru) to the bottom of the Pacific. 

A month before, in the Battle of Coral Sea,  two US carriers Lexington and Yorktown would defeat an Imperial Japanese Naval force and thwart the invasion of Port Moresby- at the high cost of the US Navy losing the Lexington. But it marked the first naval engagement that the Japanese Navy also lost a carrier- and it turns out it was a carrier they would need next month in the Battle of Midway. 

WWII marked the end of the supremacy of the battleship and the rise of the carrier. The US lost most of its battleship fleet in the Pearl Harbor attack, but none of its carriers, as they were all at sea during the attack. 

Admiral Yamamoto was consumed with destroying the US carriers, especially after the Doolittle raid, launched from the Hornet, bombed Tokyo. To that end he sought to lure the carrier fleet out of Pearl Harbor and have one final engagement where he would sink the carriers and leave Hawaii and the West coast open to attack and invasion. 

Shattered Sword examines the battle from the Japanese viewpoint. It dispels the myths that the simultaneous attacks and landing on Alaskan Aleutian Islands by Japan was designed as a ploy and to lure the US carriers out of Pearl Habor. It criticizes Japan's attack, showing how the invasion of strategically limited islands depleted much needed naval forces.  It also dispels the myths about the usefulness of the multiple failed US torpedo and bomber attacks earlier in the morning of June 4 and their contribution to the successful attacks by the Enterprise dive bombers. 

But most significant and fascinating for Rumpole, it illustrates the utter failure in the battle plan and the contribution of Japanese hubris to their defeat. Case in point-during war games the week before, one Japanese commander playing the US had his carriers on scene and ready to attack Admiral Nagumo's carriers two days before Nagumo expected them. After the war game produced the exact outcome- the loss of all four Japanese carriers,  the referee intervened and changed the outcome- as it was deemed an impossibility that Nimitz would use the US carriers as he did. 

Understanding how Japan's battle plan was flawed and how they just could not conceive of defeat is a valuable lesson for all commanders- and trial lawyers for that matter. You need a thorough understanding of the battle of Midway (sorry DeSantis drones, but we hear Deadpool is a good movie and that may be more your speed) to appreciate the fresh look at a historic battle,  and dispelling of many myths that have lasted for fifty plus years. 

Our late friend Judge Manny Crespo would have loved to read this book and discuss its findings. 





Tuesday, August 13, 2024

THE KANGEROO

 Somewhere after Ali (Cassius Clay) winning Gold in 1960 in Rome,  Americans Tommy Smith and John Carlos holding up a black gloved fist on the medal podium in Mexico City in 1968, Sugar Ray Leonard winning a Gold medal in Montreal in 1976, and Carl Lewis winning nine Olympic gold medals, including world records in the long jump and 100 meter dash....

they added breakdancing to the summer Olympics when we were not looking. 

And here is the Australian women's entry into the event. She was so bad she has set the internet on fire. 

But really, breakdancing is an Olympic event?  We are doomed. 


Here is her now infamous "Kangaroo" move. 


We surrender 

Monday, August 12, 2024

NOT GUARDIANS OF THE GALAXY

Sometimes it is important to remember we are more than our petty concerns about Miami Dade prosecutors who hide discovery, coordinate witness testimony, and put innocent people in jail. 

Well, actually we are not more than that. That is what we have devoted our working life towards- protecting our clients from the claws of devious prosecutors. 

But there is more wrong with our legal system. A whole lot more. 

Case in point and submitted for your review- a Miami Dade Inspector General's report  (Miami has an Inspector General? Who knew?) that the Guardianship program engaged in troubling conflict of issue transactions where guardians sold the property of those they were entrusted to care for, to colleagues at lower than market prices. A sweetheart deal. Otherwise known as FRAUD. 

Taking advantage of elderly people and depleting their savings is as low as ....we don't know...maybe playing chess with discovery and coordinating witness testimony in murder cases and then lying to a judge about it. But that's just us. 

Here are a few reports about the mess. 

Miami Mayor Wants to Change The Guardianship Program.

Guardian Staff Violated The Law In Property Sales

Now where was the Miami SAO in all of this? Busy in court on resisting without violence cases saying "victim wants max" and asking for statutory maximum sentences on all guilty verdicts while denying there is a trial tax. 

Scene: Miami State Attorneys Office Public Corruption Unit 

(ASA 1 is in their office watching Netflix. ASA2 is at lunch at Chik- Fil-a. They are texting each other). 

ASA1: There's an issue with guardianship and probate court. 

ASA2: I've been reading. We should really get involved. 

ASA1: Yes, my thoughts exactly. We should head to probate court and poke around. 

ASA2: Um...yeah but like there could be an issue.

ASA1: What? I have vacation scheduled for the next three weeks. Then two weeks back, before I go back on annual leave for the end of the year. Let's go when I am back. 

ASA2" Have you ever been to probate court? 

ASA1: No. 

ASA2: Me either. Do you know how to get there? 

ASA1: No. Do you? 

ASA2: Nope. Reminds me of the old joke- do you know how to get to probate court? Become a circuit judge who wants to hide. LOL 

ASA1: LMFAO. I am going to post that on my IG. Anyway, maybe I can write an interoffice memo asking for help in finding probate court. 

ASA2: Great idea. Oh damn..its almost 1. I have to go to that sentencing on that felony that came back petit theft. First offense. Gonna ask for 364. But we don't punish people for going to trial do we?

ASA1: Nope...lmfao....good luck. 

And what about the Miami Inspector Generals Office? 

First a Rumpole "Well done! Well done indeed!" for their work. 

But we can imagine what they have done in the past. 

"IG investigation finds some cafes skimped on sugar when making coladas.

"Arroz con pollo scandal heats up. 'Arroz con mango says one investigator'.

Anyway, maybe someone will get arrested here. But don't hold your breath. There are petit theft and resisting without cases to prosecute. 


Saturday, August 10, 2024

IMAGINE

 Imagine the power of words; of art; of song. 

During the Gold Medal match of women's beach volleyball at the Olympics, the Canadian and Brazilian teams went at it like it was a hockey match- or a prosecution discovery violation in Miami. 

Heated words were exchanged. There were nasty glares. 

We went to a beach volleyball match  and a hockey game broke out.


And then the DJ (did you know the beach volleyball Olympic matches even had a DJ? We did not)  played John  Lennon's Imagine. 

And smiles and peace broke out. 

Imagine that. 

This Sports Illustrated site has the video.  Take a look and  brighten up your Saturday. 


https://twitter.com/i/status/1822029131997180062



Friday, August 09, 2024

ONE BAD DIVE

On Wednesday August 7, in Paris, US diver Alison Gibson's feet hit the diving board in the preliminaries on the three-meter board dive. Her score was 0.0. Her Olympic games were effectively over with her first dive. Four years of training...and her feet hit the board- something she later said had never happened to her. 
Knowing she could not advance, Alison Gibson did not quit. She did not withdraw. She competed, finishing 28th out of 28 divers. 

And then she said this: 

“My feet were bleeding, my heels were painfully bruised from hitting the board, and everybody on the pool deck thought I was going to scratch. But I didn’t scratch. I kept my chin up and I kept fighting until the end of that event,” she said in a voiceover. “This was far from the outcome I wanted, but I fought with everything I had to represent my country as well as I could and I'm proud of that.”

“Our worth is not defined by one painful moment,” she said in the caption of the post. “I am who I am because of the journey it took to get here. And I will not let the shame and pain of this moment define me and my worth.”


Beautiful Press Conference

On Thursday, the former president gave a press conference at Mar a Lago (Motto: "The most beautiful perfect place in the universe. No one has ever seen a more beautiful, perfect place than this." )

Do not let the fake press reports that the press conference was a meandering morass of half-baked platitudes and lies given by a confused 78-year-old man. Fake news.

Nope.

The real reviews are that this was a beautiful press conference. A perfect press conference. Indeed many people are saying they have never seen a more beautiful and perfect press conference. This beautiful press conference was so perfect that is caused many people to reminisce about his perfect phone call with the Ukranian president- the one that started impeachment inquires. 

It is interesting that in the history of the presidency, we do not recall anyone ever before rating a phone call. For example, when Kennedy called Kruschev, there is no rating of the call by anyone that we can find. No ratings of any calls by Johnson, Nixon, Ford, Carter, Reagan, Bush, Clinton, Bush, or Obama. And yet, people were moved beyond all to call that phone call beautiful and perfect- much like his press conference this week. 

Just sayin... that it occurs to us people have different ways of dealing with failures. The best of us own it, and refused to be defined by it- and fight on. The worst of us lie about it and say non0sensical things like citing others calling their failures perfect and beautiful. 

One thing we agree on- if you ask people- no one has seen anything like this performance. And not in a good way. 




Thursday, August 08, 2024

BURN THE DOUBLE JEOPARDY CLAUSE

It is not all bad news for maga nation and DeSantis drones. Yes Kamala Harris has energized the Democrats and moved the needle in polling in swing states and has been drawing sold out SRO crowds with her rallies while her opponent mispronounces her name, is ascared to debate her, ridicules her race, and generally acts like the low-IQ buffoon he is and attracts (idiots of a feather flock together). 

Buuuuut......... we have some good news for those of you who don't believe in vaccines, climate change, and science in general. 

First up, and shooting to the top of the list for a judicial appointment in Florida is the Honorable Judge Eboni Johnson Rose late of Louisiana. 

In State v. Digerolamo the jury deliberated and acquitted Bridgette Digerolamo.  The defendant her attorney were out the door and celebrating when they received a message to return to the courtroom. It seems that Judge Rose did not like the verdict, so she met privately with the jury, spoke with them about the case, urged them to reconsider, and lo and behold-  would not both a Rose and a verdict of not guilty by any other name smell as sweet? Yes it would! And Ms. Digerolamo was, in a judicial moment sure to warm the hearts of DeSantis drones and Miami Dade Prosecutors who game the system, convicted after being acquitted and hustled off to prison. 

We kid you not. Here is the Louisiana Supreme Court sympathizing with the judge,  but applying that pesky double jeopardy clause and acquitting her. 

Judge Rose went on to continue to distinguish herself in her unique view of jurisprudence sure to warm the hearts of Ayatollahs in Iran,  Russian and North Korean Judges, as well as many Texans, but eventually forcing the Louisiana Supreme Court to remove her from the bench on an emergency basis, thus freeing her up for an appointment by Florida's Governor. 



If you are an originalist and textualist and do not support Judge Rose's expansive view of double jeopardy- who clearly echos Yogi Berra's maxim that it's not over until it's over, or the saying that the trial isn't over until the fat lady meets with the jury and tries to get them to change their minds * 

then maybe the State of Utah BANNING BOOKS will warm your maga heart. 

Yup, in 2024, Utah has decided to ban from public schools and libraries thirteen books written by the likes of Margaret Atwood, Judy Blume, Rupi Kaur and Sarah Maas. An article on the book banning is here. 

Mein Kampf is notably absent from the list. But off course Utah has to get through banning the Grapes of Wrath, the Catcher in the Rye, and the Diary of Anne Frank, before getting to MK. 

We are not sure what Utah is going to do with the copies of the banned books that are currently in the State, but....maybe just maybe they will decide that since there is no such thing as global warming, and that carbon emissions do not affect the planet (drill baby drill) why not .....(wait for it)

BURN THOSE BOOKS! 

"Where books are burned, people will be burned.
German Poet 1821. 

Now just to tie things up, if we can burn books, why can't we burn the double jeopardy clause and help Judge Rose's view of criminal justice "catch fire" ?  (we couldn't resist).

* We are not being politically incorrect or body shamming. The phrase entered the popular lexicon in 1976 during the NBA finals between the heavily favored San Antonio Spurs versus the underdog Washington Bullets (that name bearing its own politically incorrect burdens) and was used by sportswriter and broadcaster (and presumably opera fan) Dan Cook after the Spurs won the opening game. The phrase refers to an opera not being over until the fat lady sings and specifically refers to the Opera Gotterdammerung and the farewell scene when Valkyrie Brunnhilde- traditionally played by  buxom woman- sings the final songs. The Bullets came from behind and won the series btw. 

In order to help Utah get rid of those pesky books, we helpfully post an instructional video. A DIYS of how to burn books. 


Wednesday, August 07, 2024

THE YEN CARRY TRADE

 As the market melted down our email in box filled up with the same question: "What do I do Rumpole?"

The answer is simple. You buy when people panic sell. In the last 100 years that strategy has worked every single time. Of course you must buy quality. Apple. Amazon. Nivida. Broadcom. Meta. But this strategy always works. 

Here's an interesting take on what contributed to the meltdown. 

The Yen Carry Trade. 

Since 2016 Japan has had a very low and stable interest rate. So savvy institutional investors borrowed the Yen at a low rate, converted the Yen to US dollars and then invested those dollars in a high yield investment. For example, an investor borrows ten million dollars' worth of Yen at 2%, converts to US dollars and buys a stock that is paying a 6% dividend. Their profit is 4% - which on ten million dollars is a sweet 400,000 a year. 

BUT recently the Bank of Japan started raising interest rates trying to stimulate inflation to grow the economy. Now that plan backfired for many reasons, causing more suffering in the long dormant Japanese economy. But the unintended effect was that it caused the potential loss  of tens of billions of dollars (if not more)  with the Yen Carry trade- which caused traders to unwind their trade the only way possible- SELLING the US stocks they had bought with borrowed Yen. Thus- the start of selling which then caused panic selling. 

So what do you do? You do what Rumpole did yesterday afternoon. Buy 500 shares of Amazon; two hundred shares of Apple; 500 shares of Nividia. You nibble at the bargains and increase your position. And if like Rumpole you generate cash selling covered calls, you then watch those call options expire with no one who paid you for the right to buy your Nividia stock at 135 by August 16 (when it was at 130) and its now 106. And of course you add to that position so come September you can sell more covered calls for cash. 

Life tip- if you can analyze and understand why people are panicking, you can profit beyond  your wildest dreams. It just takes intelligence, independence, and courage to stand alone (sorry DeSantis drones, you're out on those qualities). 

This is not investment advice. This is us explaining what we do. We are not qualified to give investment advice. We are qualified to cross examine lying witnesses and write about DeSantis drones and pick out good wines at restaurants. That's it. 


Saturday, August 03, 2024

SWING AND A MISS...STRIKE ONE

 No this is not a baseball thread, although your Cleveland Indians are currently the hottest-team in baseball. 

The Dade State Attorneys Office  hire for a training officer cum putative porno writer has, Elvis like, left the building!. Hired to give a "defense attorney perspective" to prosecutors, there were issues from the get-go. "When writing a BDSM scene and encountering a prepositional phrase, the semi-colon is your best friend" was apparently not what your State Attorney envisioned in the training sessions with new lawyers. 

The news announcement was the standard pablum for someone being let go...new opportunities to explore, spending more time with family, the time required to edit a book on male dominance...you know, all the regular explanations when something doesn't work out. "It's not you...it's me" blah blah blah. 

So this comes to mind. WTF WERE THEY THINKING? 

Aren't there any well-respected defense attorneys in the Miami area they could have approached? One whose outside the office activities do not expose the office to ridicule, not to mention a fairly repugnant view  (or maybe we should say "outdated") of relationships. 

Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice and have Ron Jeremy star in the adaptation of your novel. 

Can you imagine the Power Point presentation on playing chess with discovery. "Look carefully for any evidence of innocence, and then..." next slide  "He sipped his drink with one hand whilst sliding his hand up the back of her dress with the other. No she murmured, really meaning yes..."  "Oh wait! How did that get in there? NEXT SLIDE!" 

On to the next hire!

1) Former judges released from prison in the Court Broom Scandal. "How not to bribe someone on the bench."

2) Mike Satz needs something to do so we hear. 

3)  An AI holographic imagine of Alex Michaels. "So I vas right all along about Von Zamft..."

List your nominee in the comments (but be nice). 






Friday, August 02, 2024

ANOTHER SHOE TO DROP

 

This guy knew how to bandage an ear. 


It is the dog days of August, so we are in a contemplative, reflective, and predictive mood. 

To paraphrase the English Prime Minister Harold Wilson ("Who??  wonder our DeSantis drones), 

A week is a lifetime in politics. 

There are those, when down, fight back.  The longer the odds, the more they enjoy the scrum. Harry Truman comes to mind. Rumpole in trial in Rhode Island last year, but that's another story. 

And then there are those who have no backbone, no spirit, who are not and never will be, to quote TR "The Man In The Arena" 

who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.

Our prediction is made with just a smidgen of inside knowledge, but also some objective observations, as well as a feeling. We make it, so that when it occurs and we say "we knew it" people do not scoff, although Rumpole does not lie (other than who he is). 

There is another shoe to drop with the former president  who is again running for the White House.  And we do not wish personal illness or tragedy on anyone. But there is most likely a medical- or emotional- issue that will affect him,  as he is getting his rather large ass whupped in public, day after day, the subject of more ridicule than admiration, as he cannot shake the well-placed moniker that he is just Weird. And when that shoe drops, it will once again shake this race to its core. 

So we shall see if Rumpole is right. Football season is upon us. From now through the end of the year, there will be an NFL game on television every week, and that puts us in a predictive and jolly mood (as well as a betting one). 

For those of you who do not work for the State of Florida and are allowed to say it- and for those of you who are not anti-intellectual maga morons and who believe in science, stay cool as we experience the hottest days on record. 

Coming Soon: 237 years ago in a sweltering summer heat in Philadelphia, a group of older white men met to form a country. Their predictions for the future were surprisingly prescient.