COURTS ARE OPEN (SORT OF)

 Good Tuesday morning.  State and Federal Courts are open in Miami-Dade County in the aftermath of the rain-event called ETA. "Open" in the sense of lawyers and litigants being able to appear via Zoom. "Closed" in the sense of the Covid19 Virus running rampant in Miami-Dade with a positivity rate over 7%. To put that in perspective, NYC is closing restaurants and re-instituting lockdowns because their positivity rate is over 3%. But as we say in Florida:  "We are not smarter than you;  and we are slower than you; but at least we are warmer than you. "

There are 70 days left in the most destructive presidency in the history of the United States. Some things that may occur during those 70 days: 

Thc cabinet is fired; Pennsylvania is sold to Canada...so is Wisconsin. Congress is disbanded. The US withdraws from NATO. The US invades Lichtenstein because we can. Russia buys Las Vegas. The Seventh Fleet is sold to China for a "very very good price." The wearing of masks in public is outlawed. Anyone caught wearing a mask in public is subject to a five year minimum mandatory sentence.  The President Tweets out the Nuclear Codes because "lots of people want to see them". Four Nuclear Missile Submarines are sold to Saudi Arabia in exchange for them throwing the President a "really really big parade. The type of parade no one has ever seen before." The President orders the National Archives to use a sharpie to remove Amendments 1, 3-11, and 13-14 from the original Constitution. Mosques are ordered closed because of Covid. Citizen councils are formed to report on anyone who says "Black Lives Matter." The White House is closed for renovations until further notice. The portraits of both President Bushes and Obama are lost after they are accidently set on fire. OJ Simpson is hired to investigate.  By executive order, the President must work at Mar A Lago. The entire state of Alaska is open for oil drilling.  The CDC is closed. Dr. Anthony Fauci is prosecuted by the Justice Department for speeding. Pfizer is seized by the Marines. Vaccinations will be given based on voting records. The Gulf Of Mexico is closed to commercial shipping so that more oil drilling rigs may be built. Amazon is prosecuted for selling soap over state lines. Every public school must be renamed for a Southern Confederate General. No federal funds will be spent to fight wildfires in California and Oregon. Airforce One is renamed TRUMP ONE. The Head of Qanon is named to head the Department of Education. "Every Legal Vote" is defined by law as a "every vote for a Republican."   "Defund Georgia" appears on billboards throughout the nation.  Philadelphia is closed for sanitation violations.  

Stevie Wonder is appointed to recount all of the votes by hand and until he is finished no winner of the race will be declared. 

And finally, the US Army Corps of Engineers is sent to the Mexican border to finish the wall. Rudy Guliani sues Mexico for the costs of the wall and the judgment is sent to a collection agency. 

And on January 1, 2021, by executive order, this is the newest National Park:

And this is the newest best selling shirt. We cannot wait until we get ours.