WELCOME TO THE OFFICIAL RICHARD E GERSTEIN JUSTICE BUILDING BLOG. THIS BLOG IS DEDICATED TO JUSTICE BUILDING RUMOR, HUMOR, AND A DISCUSSION ABOUT AND BETWEEN THE JUDGES, LAWYERS AND THE DEDICATED SUPPORT STAFF, CLERKS, COURT REPORTERS, AND CORRECTIONAL OFFICERS WHO LABOR IN THE WORLD OF MIAMI'S CRIMINAL JUSTICE. POST YOUR COMMENTS, OR SEND RUMPOLE A PRIVATE EMAIL AT HOWARDROARK21@GMAIL.COM

Thursday, June 22, 2006

MULDOWNEY GOBBLEY GOOK

It has been reported to us that Elder Statesman Richard Hersch was in court the other day dealing with recalcitrant Judges on the Muldowney issue.

To recap: Muldowney was arrested for DUI and passed some flatulence at the exact same moment he blew into the Intoxilyzer 5000 machine. Muldowney challenged the admissibility of his breath test citing the well known “eructation doctrine”.


However, an astute Judge, realizing that the State of Florida just entered into a 4 billion dollar contract to replace the 10 Intoxilyzer 5000 machines with the more advanced Intoxilyzer 8000 machines (it comes bundled with an IPOD and an XBOX) declined to enforce the doctrine and instead ordered the State to “open the machine and prove it is not powered by a Gerbil on a wheel.” The State objected as is their wont when they smell a rat (or Gerbil) and a super powered team of DUI hotshots took up the case in Miami.

Sitting en banc (latin for bored but trying to look interested) a panel of hot shot DUI judges headed by Ed Newman took testimony from witnesses who ranged from a disgruntled nuclear engineer who was fired from Turkey Point for drinking on the job, to Ms. Cleo of 1-900 fame.


Lacking the famed Miami comradery for which the Miami Judiciary is well known (*cough cough*) the Judges decided to each issue an individual opinion. To make matters fun, the judges agreed that each opinion would be sufficiently different from every other opinion so that consistency (which Ralph Waldo Emerson called the hobgoblin of little minds) would be non-existent.
[ Rumpole’s note- this remark is intended to be read purely in the context of this post. Any resemblance to a hobgoblin of little minds and the Miami Judiciary is purely coincidental)

As to Mr. Elder-statesman Hersch: in response to the Judges' questions on Muldowney, certificates of appealability, and such, he was reported to have averred this in a clear and concise manner:

有一天我们将失去了我们的真实身份的线索成为这些报价. 们这种智能断和浆糊到谷歌翻译工具是可喜可贺. 但是,今天的日子不Clue.sorry.

So, having done our part to clear up the Muldowney confusion, we can now return to the work of the day.

One Of the Honeymooners wrote in with some positive smack:


Ed Norton said...
Good things you want? How about Judge Blake & F.A.C.D.L.-Miami working to make the REG a free wireless hotspot so you can use your laptops in the building?How about F.A.C.D.L.-Miami working with Judge Gill Freeman to move law books into the attorney's lounge to help with last minute research? How about F.A.C.D.L.'s work to ensure payment of court-appointed attorney's fees?And how about the work of Hersch, Catalano & Arias on the Muldowny issue? Even though some judges did not see the (infrared) light, they worked their butts off!It sounds like some people are doing good things in the building!


Rumpole replies that this is a good post about good things people are doing in our little corner of the legal world. However in regard to Judge Freeman's work, while well intentioned, providing law books to criminal attorneys is akin to providing a thought provoking book to President Bush-both will go un-opened. If she wants to provide something that will be well used, Judge Freeman should work on free internet access so that the criminal defense attorneys can visit their gambling or porn sites.

See You In Court with our Chinese-English dictionary.

54 comments:

Anonymous said...

I'm number one! I'm number one. I love this blog! Chinese and Hersch and calling judges hobgoblins with little minds. I think Rumpole writes great.

Anonymous said...

Rumps, methinks you missed your calling. What say you leave this legal world behind and become a humor writer? I have to admit, this last post had me laughing out loud....

Anonymous said...

Rumps, methinks you missed your calling. What say you leave this legal world behind and become a humor writer? I have to admit, this last post had me laughing out loud....

Anonymous said...

Rump, Judge Blake is doing the free internet access already. Freeman is the "library/building judge".

ed norton said...

That means that Blake will be providing the access to your porn.

Anonymous said...

how about getting a cell phone provider to put a frickin antenna near the building so we can use our cell phones in the building

Anonymous said...

About Muldowny.

If anyone wants to be added into the email list, please contact me.

Mike Catalano
mclawyer@bellsouth.net

I am sending out (way too many) emails to defense attorneys about what is going on.

We have been told we will see orders from most of the judges by July 4th.

Have a nice summer.

Mike Catalano

CAPTAIN said...

Point of Reference:

The word is GOBBLEDYGOOK - see the following:

http://www.worldwidewords.org/weirdwords/ww-gob1.htm

but I still think Rump's piece is great.

CAPTAIN OUT .............

Anonymous said...

did you hear about all the JQC complaints filed against judges in this years testy race?

Anonymous said...

catalano is wonderful. you are merely jealous of a successful, hard working attorney.

Anonymous said...

it's easy to hate people you don't know. Get to know Mike and you will love him

Anonymous said...

Leifman fundraiser this evening was a great event.Gonzalez is a goner. His holy trinity campaign of name-ethnicity-stupidity- will be soundly thrashed at the polls.

Anonymous said...

You are so wrong about Leifman. I love Gonzalez. Get to know him, he is a great guy.

Anonymous said...

You are so wrong about Leifman. I love Gonzalez. Get to know him, he is a great guy.

Anonymous said...

I like Gonzalez too.

Anonymous said...

Leifman is a putz.

Anonymous said...

figures muldowney was irish

Anonymous said...

anyone have any comments on attorney miguel de la o, I am thinking of working with him.

any negatives?

Anonymous said...

only negative is that he has as many names as George Herbert Walker Bush

Anonymous said...

or Hilary Rodham Clinton, what the deal

Anonymous said...

Miguel reads this blog, so I'm sure he appreciates knowing he may have someone working with him who blogs anonymously - Miguel - ace this character

Sam I Am said...

Oh the things you should know of miguel de la o!

Sam I Am said...

You guys have been great. Don't forget to tip the bailiff.

Anonymous said...

c'mon leave the guy alone. He wants some info on his future boss

Anonymous said...

Miguel De La O, is that the dorking guy arguing with the fatboy on the video at www.operationrestorejustice.com

well....

Anonymous said...

leifman will win in a landslide

Anonymous said...

Miguel de la O is a real real big jerk.

Years ago, my client hit his car. Client was charged with DUI. Client was best man at his brother's wedding. He hit de la O when he was moving the groom's car to get it ready for the honeymoon... put cans on it...etc.

De la O wanted $400.00 per hour for the time he spent at the car repair shop getting his car fixed. He also wanted big damages because he missed a movie at cocowalk while waiting for the police to do the report.

He then accused me, the defense attorney on the DUI of offering him a bribe. SAO investigator taped his calls to me.... ooppppsssss... I said the opposite and told him he was a jerk for even hinting that a bribe was in order.

I think he is about the biggest jerk I have ever met.

He knows who I am.

Client was found not guilty.

I will never forgive him for all that crap.

Anonymous said...

I hear the million fundraisers are falling flat. Attorneys are not showing up.

Wouldn't it be great if the law said that attorneys were forbidden to donate to judges!

Is anyone else worried about the JNC nominating Vickie Brennan to be a judge when she is the Jeb's advisor on who becomes a judge?

Kinda funny, isn't it.

I guess she will automatically become a judge soon.

Anonymous said...

Attorney donations reek.

Here's an off the cuff response. 1) No judge may solicit campaign contributions from any member of the Florida Bar.
2) Attorneys wishing to donate to judicial campaigns shall deposit all contributions with the Florida Bar which shall be charged with distributing such funds without identifying their source. The Florida Bar would be further charged with recording who donated and to whom. Election officials would review the records during and after the campaign to ensure that campaign contribution limits were not exceeded. Two years after the election, the records would be made public.

Anonymous said...

http://www.sun-sentinel.com/news/local/broward/sfl-ckayo23jun23,0,5557042.story?track=rss
Defense lawyer from Fort Lauderdale suspended for 3 months for sassing judge




By Robert Nolin
South Florida Sun-Sentinel

June 23, 2006



Fort Lauderdale defense attorney Kayo Morgan sassed a judge two years ago. Now his words have cost him at least a summer's worth of work -- and fees.

The Florida Supreme Court on Thursday suspended Morgan, known for his work in high-profile murder cases, for 91 days. It was his third such offense, and at the close of her nine-page decision, Chief Justice Barbara Pariente issued a stern admonition: "We also warn that if he appears before this court once again for similar misconduct, we may find it necessary to ... disbar him."

Morgan, 50, represented defendants in two notorious murder cases.

In 1995 he defended Lisa Connelly, who was convicted of being among seven young people who lured 20-year-old Bobby Kent to a Weston canal in 1993 and bludgeoned and stabbed him to death. She got 22 years in prison.

In the "Casey's Nickelodeon" case, Morgan represented Pablo Ibar, who was convicted in the June 1994 triple slaying of a nightclub owner and two women during an invasion of the club owner's Miramar home. Ibar is on Death Row.

But it was a small-time felony battery trial in 2004 that got Morgan in trouble with the Florida Bar. The lawyer snapped at Broward Circuit Judge Robert Collins, who curtailed Morgan's questioning of a witness.

"I think you're out of line," Morgan shot back. "You don't talk to me like that in front of a jury."

In the protracted exchange, Collins threatened to have Morgan arrested. "Go ahead and have me arrested," the lawyer taunted. "Take me to jail and let's go with it."

The two parried on.

Collins: "And you are obnoxious."

Morgan: "So what?"

Collins: "You can't be obnoxious in a courtroom to a judge."

Morgan: "You are obnoxious to me."

The attorney won a mistrial for his client, who later pleaded out to a probation sentence.

Morgan, who has 30 days to close out his one-man practice, accepted his suspension with aplomb. "I'm going to just basically work out, get back in shape, take a three-month vacation without pay," he said. "I'm more concerned about the people I have to abandon. I'm trying to get good lawyers to step in and take care of these people."

Morgan was reprimanded for making derogatory remarks in 1995 and 1996 about judges, and was suspended for 10 days for making false statements about a judge in 2000. Once this suspension is up, he must apply to the high court for reinstatement to practice, after proving he's been rehabilitated.

"I'll try not to run over any babies and be a sweetheart between now and then," he said.

Robert Nolin can be reached at rnolin@sun-sentinel.com or 954-356-4525.


Copyright © 2006, South Florida Sun-Sentinel

Rumpole said...

Rumpole would like to adopt Broward Summer hours (or the regular hours of any county Court Judge) and take Fridays off. We keep offering the Captain to be a guest blogger but he doesn't respond. Any takers? Juan D'Arce; any Judge or attorney running for office need not apply. Captain, Jason Grey coming out of retirement, oh Susannah from the Herald, or Broward Chief Judge Dale Ross would be excellent choices.

Anonymous said...

sounds like dela o is in a turd class of his own....

Anonymous said...

MEMO: DJ ESQUIRE to provide music at Heat parade - Bayfront -- 3pm

Grieco said...

I'm a Knick fan...and it's too hot out. Next time maybe. Dead horse.

Anonymous said...

What a set up.

Vickie Brennan becomes a judge just for working for Jeb...

Are there others more qualified?

Anonymous said...

no. bush and company (formerly US of A) never make mistakes. just trust them.

Miguel M. de la O said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Anonymous said...

IF Vicky b doesnt get this appointment it is an outrage. She has tried many many serioous cases and knows the law. i know rumpole and his traffic minions will whine like a little kids at the thought of a county court judges who has forgotten more than they ever knew about trying cases and is pro-state to boot.

Anonymous said...

catalano v de la o

Anonymous said...

De la o, seems upset? As www.operationrestorejustice.com puts it De la O, a close friend of Juan D.Arce.

Is there any truth to the facts stated on that site ?

Anonymous said...

I'd be careful about thinking Brennan is pro state. She's actually pretty fair minded.

Anonymous said...

De La O is simply bothered by a pesky wannabe attorney who had no case and states he is fighting for attorneys fees of less than $300, but spends $1,000 to get them back. With clients like him, we would all become Trash Collectors for sure. I suggest pulling his DV files to see what type of activities this wannabe attorney is engaged in, i.e., who he has been having problems with in DV. Ihope he moves to South Dakota and starts his own South Dakota Menudo Boy Bar there.

A Robed One said...

You learn more about a man by who his enemies are, than by his friends. If I got this straight, De La O has made enemies of Mike Catalano and one Darin McGillis. From what I know of each, De LA O is doing something right!

To anonymous 7:50:54am poster: DE La O is the Chair of Judge Leifman's campaign. I really doubt he is friends with Juan D'Arce. Hopefully, he will set the record straight.

Anonymous said...

Has anyone actually read the KO opinion? He is one totally rude dude. No wonder his clients are in prison.

Anonymous said...

De La O, tells us something here. Did you date McGilllis or Ness?

Anonymous said...

De la O is not a well respected attorney. End of story.

Anonymous said...

I read the KO opinion and agree that KO is one rude dude. No one should act the way he does in court. He is out of control. He does it just for the sake of doing it. The dude needs some serous counseling....and if you ever got near him, he could use a bath too.

Anonymous said...

KO's clothes could use a wash as well. Maybe he should bathe in his clothes and kill 2 birds with one stone.

Anonymous said...

Leifman Lose By Landslide. Go Go Gonzalez.

Anonymous said...

Is Jeff Swartz plating with a full dick? Or is he one short card?

Anonymous said...

one day your trailer will be worth more than 800 grand, and that day you'll realize that bar complaints and malpractice are based on two different standards.

Anonymous said...

Hey Rump, why haven't you cleaned up the comments on this post?

Anonymous said...

whats was that

Anonymous said...

why was Miguel De La O's post deleted ??