Coming Friday: What does a Dade County Death Penalty Prosecutor and the rest of the criminal defense bar have in common? A Supreme disappointment.
A LONG TIME AGO
IN A COURTROOM FAR FAR AWAY....
STAR WARS.....
It is a period of civil war. FACDL/rebel lawyers, striking from a hidden base, are attacking Darth Brown and the Limited Registry-Death Star run by the evil Galactic JAC empire and ruled by the evil Emperor-Governor Scott. FACDL/rebel spies have managed to steal the secret plans to the Limited Registry-Death Star. Pursued by the Emperor-Governor Scott's sinister agents, Princess Carmen races to court, custodian of the plans that can save the FACDL and restore freedom to the galaxy....
"Don't be too proud of this technological terror you've constructed." Darth Vader.
As our movie opens the Emperor-Governor Scott orders Darth Brown to move the death star-Limited Registry into range of Alderaan- home of the General Registry Attorneys and to issue the administrative order enacting the Limited Registry. Meanwhile, an intrepid band of ragtag warriors fight the empire.
Emperor-Governor Scott: "In one blow Darth Brown we will enact the Limited Registry and kill the General Registry lawyers."
Darth Brown: "Not too fast my lord. Not even the death star can match the powers of the force."
EGS: "Princess Carmen is in our custody. Now Darth Brown....fire the death star! Enact the Limited Registry! Issue the administrative order! And we shall destroy the General Registry and criminal defense in the Galaxy. "
But the rebels fight back. Having lost the first battle against the powerful Darth Brown, a new plan of attack has emerged: A Declaratory Judgment Act lawsuit has been filed. The rebels are attempting to seek a stay of the death star-limited registry.
A JAC lawyer rushes up to the evil Emperor Governor Scott and Darth Brown: "We have analyzed the rebel's attack plans. There is danger."
EGS: "Fire the death star! Darth Brown- issue the administrative order now! Kill the General Registry Attorneys. "
But Brown cannot issue the administrative order.
Darth Brown: "The force is strong with this one."
......
Will Darth Brown get the death star/limited registry working and issue the administrative order before the FACDL rebels can destroy it?
Who gets to be Hans Solo?
Are Wookies allowed through the attorney entrance at the REGJB?
See You In Court.
The stories depicted on this blog are works of fiction. Any similarity between actual individuals, either living, dead, or members of the judiciary and actual individuals is purely coincidental.
23 comments:
if Carmen is the princess, then Jude is definitely Hans Solo. Obi Wan Kenobi is obviously Gene Zenobi. And Say Gaer's spirit is Yoda.
Who will be Ed Cowart?
Very funny and very clever post. So much is ta stake though, and we are deling with small minded bureaucrats whose main goal, is not to do justice, but to keep their jobs and the status quo. Good luck.
Jude...Jude....I ....I am your.....father.
Two brilliant posts in two days. The blog is back baby!!!!!
Its the Legislature that is F-ing the PCACs, Not Brown or even evil Scelitur our Gov.
Jude is not Luke Skywalker. He doesn't even take PCAC cases. Luke Skywalker must be someone intimately involved with the Force.
We do not care about the bottom feeders plight....I dont go to Kounty Kourt for less than 25k.
I vote Jordan Lewin as Hans Solo - DJ Esq as Luke and the Hottie PD from Newman as Lea.
Penn State Football is going to get the Death Penalty, and it has never been so well deserved.
luke is Michelle Estlund. They are both blond and like luke can wield a light saver, Michelle can wield a pen!!!!!!!!!!!!! Roy wasson is chubaka. big and Fiercely strong,yet lovable.
CJ's log stardate 65994.8:
This Rumpole business has to end. First he compares me to Dean Wormer and then Darth Vader. When I see this blogger I will raise my hand and squeeze my fingers together and he will choke until I let him go.
Meanwhile, who delivered a load of fizzies to the waterfoutains in front of the Justice Building? Who delievered ME cadavars to the Judge's annual dinner gala? Every Halloween he puts a mask on me and mocks me on his blog. ...
I will get this Rumpole if its the last thing I do. Now I have a 1:30 meeting. Judge Dennis doesn't like her new parking spot. Again. And so it goes.....
Florida Supreme Court upholds Ch. 893, rejecting Boba Hirsch's Shelton rationale.
For gods sake. The name is Han Solo. Not "Hans."
He isn't Dutch you know.
Princess Carmen:
I am enclosed inside a dark room on the 30th Floor of the Lawson sector. Before being taken away I was able to hide the plans for the constitutional demise of the limited registry in David s. Markus' tie pin! Through the door I can hear the gaurds scrambling!Security has been breached at the main door!!
The Official Captain's Log: Stardate 43152.4.
We are cautiously entering the Delta Rana Star system three days after receiving a distress call from the Federation colony on its fourth planet. The garbled transmission reported the colony under attack from an unidentified spacecraft. Our mission is one of rescue and, if necessary, confrontation with a hostile force.
We have entered a spectacular binary star system in the Kavis Alpha sector on a most critical mission of astrophysical research. Our eminent guest, Horace Rumpole, will attempt to study the decay of neutronium expelled at relativistic speeds from a massive stellar explosion which will occur here in a matter of hours.
Only In FLA
DS
Florida Lieutenant Governor target of ex-aide’s sex allegations
A fired aide claimed she caught Lt. Gov. Jennifer Carroll in what she believed to be a sexual encounter with a female employee
By BRANDON LARRABEE
TALLAHASSEE -- As part of her defense in a criminal trial, a former aide to Lt. Gov. Jennifer Carroll said she caught the lieutenant governor in “a compromising position” with another aide shortly before being fired last year.
The allegations are part of the ongoing prosecution of Carletha Cole, a former aide to Carroll who shared a recording of a conversation with Carroll’s chief of staff with a reporter for the Florida Times-Union, a Jacksonville newspaper, after she was fired.
Cole has been charged with disclosing that recorded conversation……
But its most sensational anecdote concerns Cole inadvertently walking in on what she believed to be a sexual encounter between Carroll and a female employee.
“When she entered the office, she found the Lieutenant Governor and her Travel Aide, Beatriz Ramos, in what can only be described as a compromising position,” according to a motion filed by Cole’s lawyer.
A spokesman for Scott did not return a phone call or reply to an email seeking a response, but Carroll told The Associated Press that the claims were “totally false and absurd.”
Cole took a polygraph late last year concerning her claim. She answered “yes” to questions about the incident, including “Did you ever observe Lt. Governor Jennifer Carroll and . . . Ramos in a sexually compromising position in the Capitol?”
Timothy Robinson, retired chief polygraph examiner for the Florida Department of Law Enforcement, said that “Ms. Cole’s charts were somewhat difficult to read,” but he believed her.
“Her charts, in my opinion, are indicative of a non-deceptive examinee (truthful),” Robinson wrote. “Ms. Cole passed her polygraph.”
http://www.miamiherald.com/2012/07/11/2891856/ex-aide-i-caught-lieutenant-governor.html#morer
Light Saver?? Chubaca? Right, he is Mexican
The Supremes have ruled on the mens rea requirement for a drug possession conviction and -- no surprise -- have endorsed the notion that that those with a controlled substance in their possession are presumed guilty. The majority opinion is a masterpiece of ignorance about the real lives real people lead.
Perry's dissent is outstanding -- a cry in the wilderness, but a ringing cry nonetheless. (Although the Supremes were deciding on a case out of the Twelfth, Perry quotes extensively from a certain case here in Miami-Dade.)
Read it here: http://www.floridasupremecourt.org/decisions/2012/sc11-1878.pdf
This star wars stuff isn't a masterpiece. It is ponderous.
food for thought
http://gawker.com/5925168/is-jay+zs-99-problems-legally-accurate-a-law-professor-explains-in-line+by+line-reading?utm_campaign=socialflow_gawker_facebook&utm_source=gawker_facebook&utm_medium=socialflow
We have unfinished business from last night: Ban the Bletch.
Are you nuts? Keep the Bletch. He's the best.
BTW Rump- best blog around and your popularity shows in the page views. Quite impressive.
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