WELCOME TO THE OFFICIAL RICHARD E GERSTEIN JUSTICE BUILDING BLOG. THIS BLOG IS DEDICATED TO JUSTICE BUILDING RUMOR, HUMOR, AND A DISCUSSION ABOUT AND BETWEEN THE JUDGES, LAWYERS AND THE DEDICATED SUPPORT STAFF, CLERKS, COURT REPORTERS, AND CORRECTIONAL OFFICERS WHO LABOR IN THE WORLD OF MIAMI'S CRIMINAL JUSTICE. THIS BLOG HAS BEEN CALLED "THE DEFINITIVE BLOG ON MIAMI CRIMINAL LAW" BY THE NY TIMES, THE WASHINGTON POST, THE POPE, AND DONALD TRUMP WHO ALSO ONCE SAID IT WAS "REALLY GREAT". POST YOUR COMMENTS, OR SEND RUMPOLE A PRIVATE EMAIL AT HOWARDROARK21@GMAIL.COM

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

RED DOG!

There's something strange going on in County Court next week. It's called a blitz.

Can anyone offer a rational explanation to our readers as to just what will be happening in those strange little courtrooms no one goes into on the 4th, 5th, and 6th floors (and 2-11)?

Will there be trials? Is it just traffic tickets? Will those nameless, faceless ticket attorneys who race from courtroom to courtroom clicking on those computer terminals no one knows how to use, and shouting out motions to dismiss for failure to cite subsection o5421(d), be involved?

It's all very confusing.

Talk about confusing, here's a Miami Herald article on a doctor who's had 30 years of success in having patients lose weight by eating cookies. We keep banging out those 5K runs and eating salad with a thin slice of turkey, and all this time the answer was in a box of Entenmanns.


Speaking of baked products, here's a popular blog (100K+ hits a day) on cake mistakes.


David Markus likes Judge Richard Posner's defense of Ostriches in the decision affirming the conviction in Conrad Black's case.

And finally, when in Chicago, check out Felony Franks. Longtime and careful readers of the blog will well remember our various essays, critiques and disquisitions into the perfect Chicago style hotdog.

28 comments:

Anonymous said...

Don't play ignorant about county court, Rumpole. You practice there a lot more than you care to acknowledge.

Anonymous said...

What's confusing to me about this 'blitz' is why county court seems to need one of these every year. "Due to a backlog of criminal traffic cases (that are not DUI cases)" says Judge Slom (quoting his memo.)

But why does this backlog occur?

Are judges not handling calendars fast enough? Are there just way too many cases? Not enough judges? How is it possible to clear up the 'backlog' every Oct-Nov, only to have it clogged up again a year later?

And why, during the rest of the year are most of my DWLS cases set for arraignment within 3 weeks, sounding 3-4 weeks later and trial two weeks later.
How is it that the 'blitz' always drags up the cases that we took a defense continuance on last November and for some reason just never got reset? Why have so many cases gotten 'lost' in the sytem, only to be brought up during the blitz? Seems to me this is a software problem. With the millions the county spent on their fancy system, they should have someone figure out the flaws.

And wasn't it only a few months ago that a new 'report' system was instituted for DWLS cases. Within the 2nd month or so I had judges look at me like I was crazy because I asked for cases to be put on this calendar. I was told 'my division doesn't need those - I'm all caught up.'
So why is this judge involved in the blitz?

Perhaps the people in charge need to re-evaluate their procedures, and computer operating systems, to make sure that next October we don't have to do another week of this. Perhaps one extra calendar per judge every month or so? Perhaps those 'administrative' judges could take one calendar a week? Maybe an IT guy can fix the scheduling system to make it more effective for reset cases? There has to be a better solution.

Oh, and you think the lines are long at the doors the rest of the year? With these being trials, almost all of our defendants will be appearing (some are waived.) But did the powers that be reduce the caseload on infractions? Hail no. Tell your clients to camp out Sunday night.

EYEONQ said...

WELCOME NEW SAO AND PD LAWYERS!!!

You've gone through your orientation and if you're in the SAO you've been told you will be fired for reading the blog. But you're here anyway. Good for you!

At some point you will learn of the legend of the REGJB. And when you do, ignore everything else you hear and just remember these simple words which at your time of need, will help you most:

FEAR THE Q
RESPECT THE Q
ADMIRE THE Q

CLOSE YOUR EYES.....BECOME THE Q.

Anonymous said...

I've always been amazed that the powers that be are proud to call the annual county court cleanup ritual a "Blitz." Even though we are used to using the term "blitz" in the context of football games now, the origin is much more sinister, deriving, of course, from the German word "blitzkrieg" (lightning war) that first came into common use in 1939, when the Nazis (and the Soviets) invaded Poland. Exactly who is delaring war on who in this DUI Blitz?

fake sunny and fake hashim said...

HEY RUMPOLE- we're not nameless- we're not faceless= and we're lawyers who work real real hard. Get off our backs.

Rumpole said...

7:43 AM. I last tried a county court case (3r DUI) in Broward in 1998. Not guilty. I last appeared in county court by my memory last year to get PTI for a client's daughter on a theft case. Twice in 9 years really isn't a lot. I'm not sure who you think I am. But if you want to confirm my identity just head out west. I am decamping to my home high in the Sierra Nevada Mountains next week to begin final preparations for the massive tax evasion trial I have beginning in several weeks. Just check the trial courtrooms in the 9th or 10th circuits (sorry no bigger hint than that) and you're bound to find me.

Anonymous said...

the backlog is due to the clerk's office.. a case is on the cal. there's a continuance and for some reason it gets lost in the system for MONTHS.. the clerks have no way of realizing it was never set. so once or twice a year they do and audit and see how many cases are in backlog status and have a blitz to get rid of them

Fake Blecher said...

Its NOT a DUI blitz. NO DUIs will be on calendar. Its a DWLS/NVDL Blitz.

No Rumpole- the ticket attorneys are not a part of this. They skulk around on the first floor before traffic magistrates. This is a County Court-Sam SLom production. It's Non-DUI traffic related cases.

Real fake blecher said...

yeah, like you really know. Putz.

County Court Maven said...

Wrong wrong wrong. As per Judge Slom, the blitz will be confined to non-moving infractions, (like improper equipment) drivers license cases, and leaving the scene of accident cases.

There is a semi-secret DUI component. If you fax your case number to the SAO by this Friday you will be put on a non-jury DUI calendar to be run by Judge Newman. You are on two hour standby and when called YOU MUST try your case before a judge, no pleas allowed, and only for first DUI defenses. Judge Newman will assign the Judges and courtrooms as they become available. If the officers don't show the client MUST accept a reckless breakdown. Newman and Bloom have the acceptance forms in their courtrooms that you MUST sign and fax along with your case number to the SAO. Your client MUST sign the form as well.

That is the blitz as per Slom.

Rumpole said...

Well of course I don't print comments that curse at me, even if you are 100 per cent wrong. But again I offer you this choice- you put up 50,000 and I'll put up 100,000 and when the check clears in the lawyer's trust account, I will show up and log into the blog which has my true information and then cash your check because you have no idea who I am. But put your money where your mouth is coward.

Anonymous said...

Rump do you read the Bible?

Rumpole said...

I am that I am.

Stop Milt Now dot com said...

Ted mastos for judge the movie.com is casting -

Judd Hersch for Milt Hirsch;

James Earl Jones as Sam Slom;

Wesley Snipes as Peter Adrien

Professor Irwin Corey as Stanford Blake

and in his last recorded performance- The Captain Lou Albano, as himself.

Anonymous said...

Speaking of Peter Adrien - only 444 more days until he is unemployed.

Anonymous said...

Meryl Streep as Yvonne Colodny and special guest start PINK as Jacqueline Hogan Scola!!!!

Anonymous said...

Jude Law as Jon Schlessinger

Anonymous said...

who will play judge william johnson??????

Anonymous said...

harry reems as stan blake

Anonymous said...

Also starring:

Larry David as Larry Schwartz

Louis Black as Spencier Eig

Marc Anthony as Peter Lopez

and introducing:

Jennifer Lopez as Migna Sanchez-Llorens

Anonymous said...

so if this blitz is for backlog cases, why do I have a case issued in September of this year already set for trial next week?
i didn't know 5 weeks old counted as a backlog.

Anonymous said...

Urgent!

Facebook is under some sort of virious attack. Becareful following links in emails from friends as they might be from a hacker!

Anonymous said...

harry reems as stan blake

jenna jameson as bronwyn miller

Anonymous said...

HOW come no one has reported Judge Flora Seff has opposition?

Anonymous said...

Flora needs to move faster and try being friendly or she will be back at the SAO next year.

Casting Couch said...

Sally Field as Beth Bloom

Ben Affleck as John Schlessinger

Nathan Lane as Mark King Leban

Penny Marshall as Jeri Beth Cohen

Dave Chappell as Wendell Graham

Rosie O'Donnell as Ellen Venzer

John Lithgow as David Miller

Martin Short as Joe Farina

Jason Bateman as Kevin Emas

and finally,

Michelle Pfeiffer as Mary Barzee.

Anonymous said...

george clooney as schlesinger

joy behar as lando

susie green as tinkler mendez

kristin bell as miranda

raul julia as diaz

Anonymous said...

raul julia is dead dummy