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Wednesday, July 18, 2018

AN UNHAPPY ENDING

Wednesday is National Hot Dog day. No word on whether El Chapo Café will have specials. 
In over thirty years we have never, ever, eaten anything from any of the carts that populate the streets outside of the REGJB.

Query: has any reader eaten a hot dog from a cart outside of the courthouse? Reviews? 

WHAT NOT TO DO:
Dateline- Ohio. 
The Columbus Dispatch reports that attorney Brian W Benbow was in court with a client for a child-visitation matter in December, 2014. In a conference room that had a live video feed that was monitored by courthouse deputies, Benbow put his files and coat on his lap. and then his client's hand underneath the coat. 

A sex act ensued involving the client's metacarpophalangeal joints and the lawyer's intromittent organ. The ending of this union was anything but happy.  Benbow has been suspended by the Ohio Supreme Court for two years. 

Helpful Rumpole practice tip of the day. DO NOT DO THIS. 





18 comments:

Anonymous said...

NOW you tell me not do this???

Anonymous said...

Suspended for two years?

Anonymous said...

Don't knock those hot dog vendors! Best to buy a big thick one after morning court hearings with tons of mustard, saurkraut, and onions. Add a Coke or Mountain Dew. Eat it in your car and try not to spill the mustard on your lap as you pay $4 to the electronic machine. If you put enough condiments on it, you will not be able to taste the charcoal on the outside of the dog. There is a 50/50 chance that the crunchy feeling in your mouth is the stale roll as opposed to the stale onions. Go to your office and lay down for an hour so your eyes don't pop out of your head. Around 1, head to lunch at some chic bistro and order a salad with dressing on the side and mineral water so as to impress your colleagues that you are a health conscious barrister who understands the importance of maintaining the proper image in the Miami legal world.

Anonymous said...

whenever I have a trial where the evidence is overwhelming against my client, dna-confession-video at the crime scene, I eat lunch at one of the hot dog venders outside the building. I then have a horrible case of the "runs" which requires many trips to the restroom. the delays in the trial due to this and the comcommitant dimunition in respect the jury has for me, and the fact that the judge thinks it creates competency issues (6th amendment) has led to 3 mistrials in 20 years. all clients received plea offers they could live with after the mistrial. this only works with cases where civilians are critical witnesses. harder to locate for a retrial. The onions are mandatory if you attempt this advanced trial tactic.

Anonymous said...

Only suspended?

Anonymous said...

LMFAO, the self-sacrifice for your clients is admirable. I can't review, but I can comment. I'd never eat ANYTHING off of a cart, let alone inherently suspicious meat that's been sitting out in the Miami heat all day long. Best of luck to anyone who does.

Anonymous said...

10:04 AM
Best comment of the year so far.

Anonymous said...

Boy I am so glad that our patriotic macho man of a president put Putin in his place. What a great deal he got for the American people. He sure wasn’t kidding when he said we were going to get tired of winning huh?

Anonymous said...

11:50–you are a horrible person. How do you respect yourself?

Anonymous said...

11:50 - now that's a stable genius

Anonymous said...

The best were the kobe beef hotdogs that the REN (A venue) served. Also their venison hotdogs were not bad at all. A cold so fla micro brew and we were all set sitting at the bar, chatting with Melody the hot bartender, and enjoying life.

Anonymous said...

9:40 pm. Let me guess- you are in your 20s, have very little experience as a trial lawyer, maybe not even a lawyer, and you are so devoid of intellect that you believed this actually happened. good luck in your career, I hope you aren't defending people in serious trouble because you have no ability to decifer fact from fiction.

Anonymous said...

I have employed similar tactics as 11:50 with similar results, 4 cases in 15 as a pd. I do use different food sources to achieve the result mentioned by the trial genius. The hot jamaican beef patties at 7/11 have a "je ne sais qua" about them. I think it is the unique combination of employees who do not wash their hands and handle the food, particularly after handling the mop or other cleaning equipment, it is someone the combination of sweat, dirt, chemicals, perhaps not washing well enough after a trip to the bathroom, which combines to put my intestinal tract through hell. drinking several cuban coffees on an empty stomach can have the same desired affect on irish americans of either gender. so when you have that impossible case not covered by the media, particularly in front of a judge who came over from civil, experiment with this tactic particularly for the teen or early 20s minority doing a violent crime who our society allowed to be abandoned or neglected by his biological parents and was allowed to drop out of school.

Anonymous said...

Cops, courts in Miami-Dade harsher on blacks. New study details stark racial disparities.

BY CHARLES RABIN AND TIANA HEADLEY

July 19, 2018 06:17 PM

No group in Miami-Dade County gets treated more harshly in the criminal justice system than blacks, according to a joint study released Thursday by the American Civil Liberties Union and University of Miami.

Researchers, who analyzed five years of data between 2010 and 2015, found stark differences across the board.

▪ Blacks were incarcerated at a rate about five times that of other ethnic groups.

▪ Though blacks make up less than 20 percent of Miami-Dade’s population, they accounted for almost 40 percent of the arrests.

▪ In the top 10 policing agencies in Miami-Dade, blacks and black Hispanics were arrested at a significantly higher rate than whites and white Hispanics. Arrest rates for blacks were higher in downtown Miami, on Miami Beach and in predominately black neighborhoods than they were in other parts of Miami-Dade.

▪ Blacks were less likely to be released by posting bond, were held longer during pretrial detention and were more likely to serve the most severe sentences when it comes to felonies.

▪ Blacks were disproportionately charged with crimes, convicted at a higher rate and more likely to be charged with drug offenses.

https://www.miamiherald.com/news/local/community/miami-dade/article215167840.html

Anonymous said...

What ever possessed you to update us on the Ohio pervert?

Anonymous said...

The failure to charge Carter page, by perhaps the most aggressive group of prosecutors ever assembled, continues to befuddle me. What the hell is going on?

Anonymous said...

8:01 - good question. Sometimes I think Page may be cooperating in the investigation. Sometimes I think Page may be the criminal who keeps on giving -- digging his grave deeper every time he opens his mouth, which he does all the time. Sometimes I think that the surveillance of Page didn't yield evidence sufficient for indictment. Doesn't mean the FISA warrant, issued and continued by 4 republican judges, was wrong, just that the standard for a warrant is far less rigorous than the standard for conviction.

Anonymous said...

If page is cooperating with no leaks, kudos to FBI that would be a miracle.