WELCOME TO THE OFFICIAL RICHARD E GERSTEIN JUSTICE BUILDING BLOG. THIS BLOG IS DEDICATED TO JUSTICE BUILDING RUMOR, HUMOR, AND A DISCUSSION ABOUT AND BETWEEN THE JUDGES, LAWYERS AND THE DEDICATED SUPPORT STAFF, CLERKS, COURT REPORTERS, AND CORRECTIONAL OFFICERS WHO LABOR IN THE WORLD OF MIAMI'S CRIMINAL JUSTICE. THIS BLOG HAS BEEN CALLED "THE DEFINITIVE BLOG ON MIAMI CRIMINAL LAW" BY THE NY TIMES, THE WASHINGTON POST, THE POPE, AND DONALD TRUMP WHO ALSO ONCE SAID IT WAS "REALLY GREAT". POST YOUR COMMENTS, OR SEND RUMPOLE A PRIVATE EMAIL AT HOWARDROARK21@GMAIL.COM

Saturday, March 18, 2017

TRUMP & MERKEL

We've obtained the transcript of the private meeting between Chancellor Merkel and President Trump. Conversations in italics are in German, between Merkel and her translator. 

DJT: Welcome Madame Chancellor. 
AM: Thank you. 
DJT: I know you have an election coming up, may I give you some advice?
AM: Certainly. 

DJT: Hire your own crowd counters at the inauguration.  Have them all carry those clicker things. Get your own count. Your opponents will use the crowd size against you. I had the biggest crowd in the history of the world, and yet...
AM-Int: He's mad. 
Int: Steady Madam.
DJT: You owe us money for NATO. You can pay in those German Marks.
AM: Mr. President, we use the Euro now. 
DJT: I've been thinking about using nuclear weapons. We've paid for them. Why not use them? When President Eisenhower ordered General Patton to nuke those German cities, it was tough at the time, but you made it back. I'm told you have the biggest economy in Europe. 
Aide: Mr. President, the Vice President is on the phone. 
DJT: Tell him to call back later. As I was saying, we don't win anymore. And nukes will win for us.
AM-Int: How could the Americans have done this? This man is crazy, and stupid. Nobody can take him seriously. 
DJT: Speaking of winning, We're going to ban all BMWs made in Mexico. I'm sorry about this, but it has to be done. 
AM: We don't make BMWs in Mexico.
DJT: Of course you do. I saw it on Fox News last night. Plus, the tapes show you are. The tapes of you on the phone....hahaha that's just a joke. Obama stopped taping you when he started taping me. 
Aide: Speaker Ryan is on the phone with a health care issue. It's urgent. 
DJT: NOT NOW! Listen, I'm thinking that the way to solve this NATO thing is to have us move our armies to the south and east. Face off against the French. You know how they are. Not trustworthy. 
AM: But to our west?
DJT: Putin has you covered. He's thinking of setting up a buffer zone in Poland. Protect you from the west and Russia from the east, and it will cost a whole lot less. Problem solved. My guy Jared actually thought of it. After he met with Putin last week. 

AM-Int: It's the Hitler-Stalin pact all over again. This nut wants us to divide the Poles...again! I won't be a part of this. Tell him I'm not feeling well. I have to get away from this madman. 
DJT: Here's the people you need to worry about. The British. And the English too.  That James Bond stuff is real. Fox News says Obama can leave a small pen in the room and whamo! they can record everything. It gets sent by telegraph and satellite to the Australians.. by the way didn't you invade Australia in world war two? Big mistake leaving. Tremendous mistake...
AM-Int: He doesn't know the difference between Austria and Australia, I don't know what to do here.
Aide: Mr. Putin on the phone for you Mr. President.
DJT (jumping up) I need to take this. Be right back. ..Mr. Putin....yes...she's here...told her about Poland...loved it...thought it was a tremendous idea....yes....and yes sir....and yes, right away....yup...he did tape me....fake news...yes...I saw it ....yes....yes....anything you say big guy....







9 comments:

Anonymous said...

Rump, I'm renaming your brain Trump Tower Miami because the President is living rent free in your head.

Circle K

Anonymous said...

10:19 - Do you imagine that Rumpole has some bizarre obsession with a relative nobody? Trump is a dangerously-narcissistic childishly-impulsive and studiously-ignorant president of the most powerful country in the world. Is there something more pressing that Rumpole should address? A judge who is late to calendar? A new speedy trial case? Turnover at the PDO or SAO?

I like reading satire about the most heartless and incompetent president we have ever had. Thanks, Rumpole.

Anonymous said...

10:19 now that's funny!

Anonymous said...

10:01 - You are Trump Tower South.

Circle K

Anonymous said...

Your other Diary entries for Trump have been much better. Enjoyed those very much - this one not so much.

Anonymous said...

Fight the libtards We did, and continue to win. When will you ever get over the fact that trump won an election. Hillary lost. The country spoke. You're satire was mildly amusing at first but is becoming sad. Clearly your obsessed that a criminal lost the election. Trump 2020

Anonymous said...

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Anonymous said...

Thanks 10:01. Well said!
Viva la resistance!

Anonymous said...

Trump will be in jail before the end of his first year. Stupid and immoral is a bad combo for a major political figure. Too many eyes on you! You can survive being stupid and honest or smart and dishonest but stupid and dishonest reproduces disasters. On top of that, the Republican legislative community hates him and are dying to replace him with Pence. There is no doubt that it is high ranking Republicans who are leaking the information of his crimes and sedition.