NFL WEEK 4 2024 BIG BEND EDITION

 Before we begin our football picks, let's just have a moment to reflect on our fellow citizens in the big-bend area of Florida- the ones who reliably vote MAGA, who chant "drill baby drill" and "lock her up" at rallies, and most importantly, do not believe in that liberal cancel culture "global warming" nonsense. They got wacked by a gigantic storm- maybe because they didn't pray hard enough. It certainly wasn't because the Gulf Of Mexico waters are warmer than they ever have been. 

Back to football. 

Talking about disasters, our picks for 2024 have been anything but good. Consider we had Georgia -1 last night, and they come back from 28-0, only to lose to Bama. This is what is called a losing streak. The best touts have them and we are in the middle of one now.  (But we did have Skene and the Pirates over the Yankees yesterday- Skenes has been the best bet in Baseball since June). 

So what aren't we doing anymore?

1) We aren't betting on the Titans and Will "fumble" Levis. 

2) We aren't picking the Fins or the Cowboys anymore. 

Personally, we are still able to afford the Opus One we had last night here in Chicago, because of (well Nivida but that's on a different blog) our picks on individual performances- hitting on passing yards and TDs last week for Aaron Rodgers and the Jets. 

Ok, let's reset. 

Best Bet of the day- risk your Opus One Wine money and a little of the mortgage to get back some losses:

Bengals (who are less than 10 points from being 3-0) over the Panthers -5 in Carolina. We initially like the over, but the weather may affect that, so just take the Bengals, who are an angry bunch today. 

Broncos at Jets. Let's play a weather under 39.5 as it has been raining in NYC and NJ all week. 

Give the -5.5 and take the Texans at home, angry like the Bengals for getting their ass whopped last week, over a struggling Jaguars who suddenly have big QB questions. Trevor Lawrence has basically disappeared. 

For passing Props we like Stroud  +250 yards -170 (lay 170 to win 100) or +275 yards +115. 

Survivor Pool: It has been very rough year for Survivor players- not just on the blog, but everywhere, with favorites like the Bengals going down week one, and the Bucs tanking at home last week. But we have a few crafty players left, and lets see this week if the 49ers continue the survivor curse of losing as a big home favourite. If you haven't played the Texans yet, that would be our pick, along with an angry Bengals team on the road- and yet we picked  San Fran at home to right the ship. 

Survivor Pool 2024 Week 4 by Anonymous PbHV4H on Scribd

THE H WORD

 Florida's Governor has banned the use of a word, starting with H, that is used to describe a weather phenomenon with cyclonic action that rhymes with...well, we cannot think of anything it rhymes with,  but it is the name of the U of Miami sports teams. 

The tragic news is that the system, which will be named Helene if the winds exceed 74 mph, is bearing down on the west coast of Florida right where ....wait for it....most of Florida's judiciary is now located at their judicial college (Motto: "Sometimes wrong, never in doubt."). This means that their vacation   seminars on Thursday and Friday will be canceled and  your favourite Judges will be scurrying (adjective intentionally used to make reference to something else which scurries) home ahead of the storm. 

Here are the seminars being canceled which will be reset. 

Thursday 9-11 am: Gavel Selection: "The gavel chooses the Judge Mr. Potter."

Thursday 1-4 pm: Calendar scheduling. Or "How I show up at 11 for my 9 am calendars and you can too!" (Requires subscription to Instagram Account "@Just_ Judgin" ).

Thursday 5:30-8 pm: Vodka Martini Mixology. Those cutups from the new 6th DCA show off their bartending skills whipping up the best vodka martinis.  Highly recommended for the lawyer who is told she cannot use fear in a self-defense case and loses the appeal PCA. 

Friday 9-11 am.  Voir Dire- who needs it? Strategies to shut lawyers down in jury selection and move the trial along- tee times at 5pm don't open up very often- neither do mani-pedi appointments at your fav salon. 

Friday 1-4 pm.  Second Continuances? Surely you jest.  You tried every case within a month of getting it when in private practice. There's no reason every lawyer cannot be as successful and efficient as you were. 

Friday 530-8 pm. Elevator Pitches made simple over wine. The doors close and you find yourself alone with the Governor's chief of staff in an elevator. You have 15 seconds to explain why you should be elevated to circuit court/district court of appeal/ Florida Supreme Court. Choose a wine flight (California Cabs; Interesting Pinot Noirs; Racy Rose's) and sip and learn. 

When you see your favourite judge make sure to tell them how sad you were to learn that a pesky storm had the temerity to interfere with their important judicial studies. 

NFL WEEK THREE 2024 BTO EDITION

Update RIP Mercury Morris Dolphin's great, who is part of the REGJB history. 

Trivia: Name the Judge, prosecutor, defense attorney, charge, and what did the Judge say to Morris after sentencing him (case later reversed on appeal). 

 

 Update - survivor pool below.  

Let's keep the music theme rolling. On this date in 1974 Bachman-Turner Overdrive releases "You Ain't Seen Nothin Yet" which was their only #1 hit. Lead singer Randy Bachman never planned the famous stutter commenting on the song "We thought for fun I'd stutter and we would send it to my brother Gary..." But the stutter remained and the rest is history. 

 

It's BTO baby so turn this one UP!

 In case you need to know- Packers QB Love INACTIVE for today and Malik Willis gets his second start and Justin Herbert is starting for Chargers at QB in Pittsburgh. 

We are cleaning up the survivor pool and will have it up shortly. Sorry we missed last week- a trial intruded (hung jury late Friday- yuck...have to do it all again). 

Not a lot of games we love. 

We like the over 46.5 KC and Atlanta and if you want to have fun, take Atlanta for the money line upset +135- should be 150 but a lot of sharpies like this upset. 

Miami at Seattle. Sorry Fins fans- they should have kept Mike White as backup QB. Seahawks -4. 

Giants at Cleveland. No one wins. Both teams are awful. 

Pack at Tennessee. We are still riding the Titans. Wil Levis fixes the stupid and wins today against a Pack team that will be running the ball. Tennesse -3 and under 37. 

Survivor Pool Week3 2024 by Anonymous PbHV4H on Scribd

HAPPY EARTH WIND AND FIRE DAY

 It is Earth Wind And Fire Day! 

September 21. 

Enjoy while we work on catching up on the survivor pool. 

We are liking Tennessee -7 and will update the late games later. Go Vols!

FRIDAY FUN

This may be the greatest video in the history of the internet. The laughing is by the person recording it, not us. 

Enjoy. 

 

 We will update survivor pool as soon as this jury comes back (no we didn't violate our avoid Friday verdict rule- they went out Wednesday night...ughh.) 

HELD

 Sean Combs indicted...

Sean Combs held without bond. 

Pre-trial detained. 

Thoughts? 

NFL WEEK TWO

 Bad start  week one for 2024 and it only got worse when we took a massive beat down on the Fins Thursday night game. Only bet we won was that no Dolphin would be cuffed by a cop before the game. And we had to lay 250 to win 100 on that on Draftkings. 

We recouped our losses yesterday, but that was only because we were with College sharpies who guided up. Bama- check. Plus the over. Tennessee giving 49? No prob- the score was 71-0. Plus some parlays with Texas and Nebraska. 

Today is tough pickings. 

Only game we have put down money on is Texans at home -6.5 over the Bears. 

If you must- Steelers/Broncos under 32. Another Mike Tomlin 17-7 type of game shaping up, but we'd feel better teasing that to under 38...which actually isn't a bad idea!

Jets- Titans- two 0-1 teams facing off. We like the Titans. The Jets are shaping up for another Jets season, so take another home dog +3.5 - we like the Titans and over 41 doesn't seem bad. 

Falcons at Eagles. Falcons aren't good.  a mediocre Steeler team beat them at home. Eagles are looking good. Lay the 6 and take the over 46.5. 

Our "you're on the clock for the first pick in the 2025 draft" pick- Your NY Giants are just awful. The wheels are off the bus and it's only week one. They draft a top WR and have no one who can throw him the ball.  Giants losing to rookie QB in DC +1.5 just feels right. Commanders -1.5 for their first win of the season and their rookie QB's first win.  And that makes the NY Giants our first candidate for the #1 draft pick in the 2025 draft- which works because there are several good QBs coming out. 

Again- we are only risking Rumpole money on the Texans (maybe under Steelers/ Broncos teased to under 38.5)- the other picks are only if you must.

Rumpole Rant: 

Number of women who have accused Browns QB os sexual assault: 27.

Number of games Brown QB has started for team since they guaranteed him 230 million: 13. 

Karma. 

This isn't cancel culture. The Browns are free to employ a man who is most likely a rapist and settled dozens of lawsuits with women who accused him of sexual assault. We just would never root for such a team and would advocate boycotting them- much like when the Vikings overlooked that their star running back Adrian Peterson beat his children with sticks.  

Now here's what happens when we do this.  Trolls come out and say "what about player X who is on ___ team- why don't you boycott them?" And our response is failure to act on every wrong at every moment doesn't make the current wrong excusable. We might well want to boycott a team that employs another player who is a rapist. What we do know now is the Browns willingly traded for their Qb and willingly gave him 230 million dollars fully knowing the man they were employing had been accused of rape over and over.  The current accusation that arose this week is heinous and vile,

You get what you pay for. 

Shame on them. Don't watch the Browns until they cut him. That's what we say. We won't - and we won't bet on them or discuss them in the future. As Shark Tank Star Kevin O'leary likes to say: They are dead to us. 

JAMES EARL JONES

 He was simply the greatest actor of his generation. He was born to play Othello, which he did on Broadway. And then decades later he gave what we consider to be THE GREATEST speech in the history of the movies. We cannot watch this without feeling goosebumps every time. 

He died on Monday at age 93. But we will have this forever and forever. 

And with this speech he forever placed his imprimatur on the game of baseball- for this is baseball and this love of the game is something he communicated as only he could. Man meeting the moment? This man met this role and gave the performance and speech of his life and for the ages. 

JUDGE MORENO WAS RIGHT

UPDATE: As per MDPD he wasn't thrown to the ground, he was "redirected" to the ground. Oh. That makes a difference. It's bullshit cop Orwellian speak for they grabbed this black guy from his expensive car and threw his ass to the ground because he had the temerity to speak up.  

A relevant portion of the body cam footage is below. 

Way back in 1987, star Dolphin wide receiver Mark Duper missed a county court criminal traffic case court hearing necessitating a relatively new county court judge to have to issue a bench warrant for one of the most popular Miami athletes of the day. 

Demonstrating his ability to both adhere to the law while recognizing the impact of his decision, Judge Federico Moreno, who would later be elevated to circuit court, the federal bench and nominated to the eleventh circuit by president George Herbert Walker Bush (the nomination stalling when Bush lost his reelection bid) wrote on the bench warrant (judges wrote on paper back then)

DO NOT ARREST ON SUNDAYS

 Wise words which the Miami Dade Police Department should have adhered to this past Sunday when they threw Dolphin star wide receiver Tyreek Hill to the ground and cuffed him over a traffic stop. 

ARE YOU READY FOR SOME FOOTBALL? NFL WEEK ONE 2024

UPDATE SURVIVOR POOL BELOW (Bengals lost- it's not pretty) 

This is our favourite time of the year. The baseball division races are heating up. The US Open's finals are being played. In the northeast there is a hint of fall in the air. And the NFL is back and we are ready for football. 

If you have followed our picks over the years (and if you have you can thank us for that new 911 Turbo you're driving) then you know we are big on identifying early season trends before the rest of the world catches up. 

Our trends- the team that starts the hottest until it cools off in January is our own Miami Dolphins. So we are on them big early, starting with Miami over Jax Sunday 3.5. Ride those Dolphins as they jump out to an 8-2 start and make Miamians think of a super bowl and Bourbon street this  year.....until mid-January rolls around. 

The Panthers will be bad, but if you can get +7 in a game, consider it. The Texans will be good, but the line will be too high and they won't cover much. Ditto Jets. The Bills took a step back, so avoid them in knock-out pools and take points against them (but probably not this weekend as we do not like the Cardinals at all but 8 seems too high for the Bills to cover so just leave the game alone.) 

Want a team to watch? The DC Commanders. Also the Raiders- bad defense but Gardner Minchew is a more than a decent QB and he has weapons. 

People are down on the Chargers. We are not. They got a beast rookie O lineman, a good rookie WR in Ladd McConkey and Herbert can sling it. They will give KC a run for their money in the division. 

It is going to be a great year. 

Todays picks: 

Best Bet: Fins at home - 3.5 over Jags;  we did a nice parlay over 49 and Fins -3.5 $75 pays 247.50 on DraftKings which you cannot use if you're not in the beautiful northeast today (but try the Hardrock app which allows bets in Fla). 

Home Dog? We love Home Dogs. We have a vacation home paid for by home dogs. Giants +1.5 over Vikes. 

Game of the Day: The 4pm Cowpokes at the Brownies. Cleveland has a real strong team on paper except for ....that small position called the QB. The Cowboys are one of the two summer soldiers that perform well in September and October before breaking their fans' hearts (the other being our Fins). So Ride Dak showing Jerry why he deserves that new contract and bet against the worst trade and signing in recent memory-the Browns trade for Deshaun Watson. Cowboys + 2.5 at the mistake by the lake. 

We l...o...v..e.. the over 41 here, and again you can parlay it with the Cowboys getting 3.5. 

Raiders at Chargers. Over 40 is a great bet. We parlayed it with the over 41 Cowboys game AND did a sweet three way parlay with the Fins over 49 for 25 bucks because that will keep us in Pizza and hard seltzer until the end of the season. 

Fantasy Football dig....Oh they laughed at us when we reached waayyyy down the draft board to nab Xavier Worthy, WR Chiefs. But our specialty is picking rookies who tear it up. We did it when Mahomes started after sitting a year; we drafted Saquon when he was a rookie and then never touched him, and now we did it with X. Fastest WR in the league and he has Mahomes throwing to him??? This isn't hard folks. Two TDs in his first game; a TD the first time he touched the ball. Laugh all you want. 

Survivor Pool 2024 by Anonymous PbHV4H on Scribd

DOMESTIC VIOLENCE AND SELF DEFENSE

One of the great legal tragedies over the last fifty years was the dark underside of domestic violence- women who kill their spouses in self-defense. Not surprisingly, the same legal system that for decades dismissed battery and aggravated battery charges when the defense attorney would simply tell the court the defendant and victim were married and the judge would dismiss the case(ask those of who were around in the 70s and 80s if this did not occur all the time in the REGJB), prosecuted women who fought back and killed their significant other in self-defense. 

It is just another short failing of a legal system we delude ourselves in being the best in the world (far from it IOHO).

This NY Times article about that issue is well worth a read, especially for those DeSantis drones who turn a blind eye to doing the right thing by just calling balls and strikes and telling lawyers that the legislature makes the laws and judges just interpret them. 

Check it out between NFL games this weekend. 

Not to diminish the seriousness of this post, we have some early betting advice. 

Chiefs/Ravens over 47 (but the rain has us a bit hesitant although we have placed the bet) parlayed with under 49.5 in the Eagles/ Packers game in San Paolo Brazil where crime is so rampant that the NFL basically told the teams to not let the players leave the hotels lest they be robbed and shot. 

We kinda sorta like Ravens +3 in KC as a revenge game, but not enough to put more than a fin on it. 

(UN) HAPPY HOUR

 

UPDATE WE HAVE TWO SPOTS OPEN IN OUR REGJB FANTASY FOOTBALL LEAGUE 

SEND US AN EMAIL THAT YOU WANT IN- DRAFT IS TUESDAY NIGHT 8PM (pretty sure about that but we once missed one so we are double checking )  AND WE WILL FORWARD IT TO OUR SECRET LEAGUE COMMISONER WHO IS KNOWN IN HIS/HER REGULAR LIFE AS "THE HAMMER" SO DON'T MESS AROUND IN THIS LEAGUE

HARRY POTTER UPDATE 

Every year on September 1, crowds gather at the Kings Cross railway station for the 9 am announcement for the Hogwarts Express departing at track 9 3/4. Reason 1,234 why London is better than Miami. 

We are not sure this lineup would make anyone happy. Thank goodness they are serving alcohol. 

And remember to sign up for the world famous REGJB Survivor League. It is legendary. 

FBpool12@gmail.com send and email that you want to compete. Fake Alex Michaels has some choice words for you if you're in the league. 

Enjoy your holiday weekend.