WELCOME TO THE OFFICIAL RICHARD E GERSTEIN JUSTICE BUILDING BLOG. THIS BLOG IS DEDICATED TO JUSTICE BUILDING RUMOR, HUMOR, AND A DISCUSSION ABOUT AND BETWEEN THE JUDGES, LAWYERS AND THE DEDICATED SUPPORT STAFF, CLERKS, COURT REPORTERS, AND CORRECTIONAL OFFICERS WHO LABOR IN THE WORLD OF MIAMI'S CRIMINAL JUSTICE. THIS BLOG HAS BEEN CALLED "THE DEFINITIVE BLOG ON MIAMI CRIMINAL LAW" BY THE NY TIMES, THE WASHINGTON POST, THE POPE, AND DONALD TRUMP WHO ALSO ONCE SAID IT WAS "REALLY GREAT". POST YOUR COMMENTS, OR SEND RUMPOLE A PRIVATE EMAIL AT HOWARDROARK21@GMAIL.COM

Monday, January 06, 2014

REGJB 2014

Welcome Back! You've had your holidays, drank too much egg nog, eaten too many cookies and slices of candied nut cake, dealt with client emergencies when no Judge's chambers was answering their phone, and if they did, they didn't want to schedule a hearing until today. 

But if you're in the REGJB with a case set for trial, then you ignored our second rule of jury trials ((c) Rumpole 2014, all rights reserved) Do not EVER let a case be set for trial the first week of the new year. EVER. 

Lets examine this closely. There are multiple problems with scheduling a trial for the first week of the new year. 

First: You spend your holiday working and  preparing for trial while your phone and email is flooded with pictures of friends on the top of the mountain in Aspen or at the top of the water-slide on a cruise ship. It stinks. 

Second: The prosecutor has spent the holidays thinking about their new years resolutions, one of which more likely than not was to try more cases and ask for tougher sentences. They want that promotion in the new year that their spouse/significant other spent the holidays haranguing them about.

Third: The Judge has also spent the holidays thinking about new years resolutions, but most likely their resolution is the opposite of the prosecutor's. "I worked too hard last year. I didn't spend 100K to become a judge just to let some snot-nosed defense attorney keep me in trial until 5pm every day. Why that Judge in Lee country bragged to me at the judicial reception in November that after he gave a defendant thirty years on a third degree felony that he only had to try one more case the whole rest of the year."
The Judge, with their addled capacity for logic, decides that by trying a few cases in the first few weeks of the new year, and handing out stiff sentences, that the word will go forth and they will soon be sipping margaritas poolside by 3pm every day, or squeezing in a quick back nine after a long lunch. 

Whereas the last few weeks of the year are a great time for a defendant to be sentenced, the first few weeks of the new year are a minefield for defendants. The time is best spent preparing for trials in February and March. We speak from experience on this. If you are unlucky enough to be walking the hallways of the REGJB the next few days, listen to what your colleagues are saying about judges and prosecutors and see if we aren't correct. 

As a practical and beneficial side effect, if you've scheduled a vacation for these next few weeks, the hotel rates are lower, the ski slopes are less crowded, and you can turn the tables on your miserable colleagues and send them selfies of you on an empty ski slope or strolling an empty beach at Cabo. 

Happy New Year. 

See You In Court, just not this week. 

8 comments:

old guy said...

And even worse, your jurors are thinking about how they can pay for their purchases on credit. They are pissed at someone, and will take it out on your client!

REAL FORMER JUDGE said...

Rump...how is the snow base in the Sierra Mountains this time of year? Are you skiing with the family or are you hiking? Truckee has some great restaurants right now. Try Pianeta Ristorante and also Manzanita...tell us what you think? Enjoy your time off.

Anonymous said...

Just sayin that if Rump is in Lake Tahoe and Phil is in miami - saw him in ct today..... What does that mean? And where is Lurvey or Alschuler?

Anonymous said...

Rump is lurvey. We all know it.

Anonymous said...

Nobody did it so I will:
Officially calling the Shumie for 2013.

And BTW- if you're not following the fake Alex Michaels account at @draculawyer you are missing genius.
Funniest f'ing account on Twitter.

Sierra Nevadas regular said...


Thank you Phil for your post at 10:23 AM.

If you do not have a real life, and your highlight of the day is reading Twitter, then you really should follow the advice of 1:15 PM. What a true waste of time.

Real Former Judge. Avid Sierra Nevadas skier here. Very disappointing snow season so far. We get very spoiled out here. Last year at this time, we had over 200 inches of snow fall from October - December. This year it's 4-5 feet to date.

Nice temps this past weekend and mild winds made for a great ending to our ski vacation. Back to school and back to work means we are hoping for lots of "Dump Alerts" between now and Spring Break.

Anonymous said...

This blog has gotten so boring. Rump you need to spice this up.zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

How about some election talk? Jackie Schwartz has an opponent and you don't even comment on it?

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