WELCOME TO THE OFFICIAL RICHARD E GERSTEIN JUSTICE BUILDING BLOG. THIS BLOG IS DEDICATED TO JUSTICE BUILDING RUMOR, HUMOR, AND A DISCUSSION ABOUT AND BETWEEN THE JUDGES, LAWYERS AND THE DEDICATED SUPPORT STAFF, CLERKS, COURT REPORTERS, AND CORRECTIONAL OFFICERS WHO LABOR IN THE WORLD OF MIAMI'S CRIMINAL JUSTICE. POST YOUR COMMENTS, OR SEND RUMPOLE A PRIVATE EMAIL AT HOWARDROARK21@GMAIL.COM

Thursday, January 26, 2006

PORTIA, PD'S , CHUNKY LAWYERS AND BOTH JUDGES SCHWARTZ

The Portia of Our Chambers purrs:

Rumpooole: I have my own poll! You do flatter me. But no one has answered my ad. And I get awfuly lonely in my apartment at night, reading FLW's naked and wondering who will tutor me. I need some big strong defense attorney to cross examine me and spank me when I answer the wrong way. I'm sort of sad no one wants to see my long legs. Oh well. it would be nice if you guys could raise your eyes just a bit when talking to me. I do have a face you know.
Portia.


Portia’s suitor replies:

Ok, Portia, I'll raise my eyes and answer your ad. Leave your messages at
portia_pd@yahoo.com


Rumpole notes: We thought we were the only ones who read the FLW au natural. Portia my darling, you know its your legal mind that we lust for.


STATE VS FEDERAL PDS

Don King writes:

To settle this state PD versus federal PD argument, let's have Jason organize a boxing match in the Mahi parking lot between both teams and take bets. The winning team then donates the prize money to their favorite judges' campaigns. What do you think?

And another reader likes this match-up:

you would rue the day the top comes off bill barzee and all the rage bottled under that cheerful red mop comes spilling out. barzee v. stein? barzee in 3.

A “friend of Bill” writes:
Stop writing about barzee. He doesn't care about this.

And another reader writes:
Barzee and Stein on the cover of mad magazine


A blog first: a reader admits they were wrong!!

OK OK I admit I was just was wrong about Ms. Williams (see recent poll numbers) but I'm sure proud of all rage it caused.



Judge Larry Schwartz on the blog drew some comments.

An angry voter yells:

Does anyone else think it's pathetic that Larry Schwartz keeps trying to defend himself on this stupid blog? He must have something better to do with his time. Come on Larry, go read some case law or something. Prepare yourself for what's coming.

But a wise passer by responds:

Does anyone else think it's pathetic that Larry Schwartz keeps trying to defend himself on this stupid blog? No. But it is amusing someone would insult the very blog they were using as their anonymous soap box.


Rumpole worries: Lets not get into the habit of calling this the "stupid blog."

A judge Larry Schwartz fan writes:

Judge Lawrence is not at all trying to defend himself. He states that he believes in a fair trial and that soundings are the appropriate time to seek continuances. No one ever accused him of not giving a fair trial, or being procedurally unfair. If he was defending himself, he'd address why it is he is so rude to each and every person who appears before him, both lawyers and defendants.

Rumpole replies: We came out in support of Judge Larry Schwartz and several readers left comments that could kindly be called “bracing” at best. It was nice to see Judge Schwartz participate and respond. He wasn’t so much as defending himself as adding to the discussion. Plus, you think its case law Judges are reading on the computers when they are on the bench?


ON THE HEFTY DUI PRIVATE LAWYER POSTS:

A chunky DUI lawyer “weighs” in:

don't call me fat.
/s/ fat jim.

And another reader writes:

fat Ed is a surprisingly crafty individual who can be seen walking the halls of the REG building from time to time. Sometimes, he appears relatively young and spry, other times, he dons a disguise, gains 60 pounds and begins to use words that he does not appear to fully understand. Warning, to his credit, in disguise, he is an extremely impressive and accomplished defense attorney capable of causing riots in a single bound. He also possesses the uncanny ability to appear in both disguise and in person in the same location at the same time! This character trait is known to be endearing to jurors, women and young children. Any prosecutor attempting to confront this individual should use extreme caution, especially when he is in disguise.



SHELDON SCHWARTZ MELT DOWN

WE HAD SEVERAL EMAILS AND COMMENTS ABOUT TODAY’S (THURSDAY January 26, 2006) MIAMI BEACH CALENDAR HANDLED BY SHELDON SCHWARTZ.

An angry reader writes:

Some musings re: Sheldon Schwartz

I had the distinct displeasure of wasting the entire morning before this blowhard who was covering for Judge Pozo this morning on the beach. My heart goes out to anybody and everybody (and there were many) who had to suffer through his calendar, listening to his nuggets of wisdom which fell to the earth like elephant turds at the circus. For better or worse, the Haitian Gestapo made sure there were no weapons in the courtroom. If I had only known ahead of time, I would have brought a jug of Kool Aid and some Dixie cups. I'm convinced the only reason that the cops sitting in the jury box didn't suck on their semiautomatics was because they were too busy sleeping off the midnight shift.
No, really, IT WAS THAT BAD.
Somebody please tell me who is running against this schmuck so I can sign over my IRA.


Rumpole replies: several lawyers were buzzing angrily today about the Miami Beach calendar. We have said before that we support Shelly Schwartz, but we will post the truth. And the truth is that Judge Schwartz does not always accommodate attorneys by taking them out of turn, and he runs calendars that can sometimes go on and on and on like former Judge Ferrer touting his modesty or the line Herald scribe Nesmith waits in every morning. Time is money Judge Schwartz. You know that. You were in private practice long enough to know the pressures we are all under. Take some attorneys out of turn. Put a smile on their face. Its such a small gesture, and yet it can mean so much.


KUDOS TO RICHARD SHARPSTEIN AND DOUG HARTMAN. You guys turned a losing case into a winner. We worry about those guys back on the street arresting our clients, but you guys did your job superbly, and that's what counts. We saw a bit of the trial and heard the comments. It was over by opening.

SEE YOU IN COURT. NOT MIAMI BEACH BRANCH COURT. WE CAN'T STAND THE LINES.



30 comments:

Anonymous said...

Say what you want about Ferrer, but he was one of the best judges we'll ever have and a hell of a nice guy.

Anonymous said...

Oh my God! Ferrer was one of the most pompous, arrogant, and nastiest judges in the building. Whoever said he was the best and nicest must be one of the prosecutors that was sleeping with him!

Anonymous said...

Amen to that last post. That former jumped-up security guard, cop wanna be was a tool.

Anonymous said...

I tried a murder case bf Ferrer when I was a APD. No question he is a law and order type but he let us try our case and the man knows the law.

Anonymous said...

Rumpole it is obvious that Bennett H. Brummer hates unpopular high profile cases . Ceasar Chavez-delay then conflict.The Orlando five case. Keep the juvinile then conflict. Rapalo- delay then conflict a week before jury selection. On Rapalo, why not just try the rapes first- then conflict off of the escape if no other way out? Was the State gonna call that witness in the rape case? No. What's the real conflict?

Anonymous said...

Totally OT, but I wish I'd been a fly on the wall at the 2004 breakfast meeting between Hank Adorno, Manny Diaz and Joe Areola.

The city manager's claim he didn't understand the settlement seems to rest on his ability to convincingly argue he's an idiot.

Anonymous said...

Well... the JNC is accepting applications to fill the shoes of the departed.

Query: will qualified applicants subject themselves to the JNC's political interrogations...or will we see the same slate re-apply for the 12th time in a row?

Damn. Answered my own question.

Anonymous said...

Every media case is a conflict for B.H.B. Thats how he earned the nickname stealth brummer.

Anonymous said...

LOL. Ferrer was only nasty to folks who deserved it. If you made a stupid argument, didn't bother to do your research, misrepresented your case and wasted everyone's time (which many of our colleagues do), he gave you what you deserved.

Anonymous said...

About the JNC accepting applications...It doesn't seem like it's always been the same slate for Circuit. Some of the appointments from the past year seem to be brand new applicants who got out of committee and then appointed. But it's true that a lot of people have been applying for a long time.

SHELDON SCHWARTZ said...

I APOLOGIZE FOR MY DEMEANOR THIS PAST THURSDAY AT THE MIAMI BEACH COURT.
IT WAS A ABBERATION.THOSE WHO APPEAR BEFORE ME REGUARLY KNOW I START DOCKETS PUNCTUALLY AND MY DOCKETS RUN SMOOTHLY.I AM ALWAYS IN COURT EARLY AND HANDLE MANY THINGS PRIOR TO THE ARRIVAL OF THE PUBLUIC AND COUNSEL.THAT GOES FOR MITIGATION DOCKETS WHICH AT COUNSELS REQUEST I VOLUNTEERED AND CONTINUE TO HANDLE.THEY ARE USUALLY AT REG EVERY THURSDAY (BUT LAST THRUSDAY OF MONTH WHEN I GO TO MIAMI BEACH).THEY ARE SCHDULED FOR 8:15 BUT I ARRIVE AT 7:30 AND REVIEW AND RENDER MY DECISION ON THE COMPUTOR.ATTORNEY THEN REVIEW THEIR CASES AND IF THEY WISH THEM TO BE REVIEWED AGAIN I DO SO.THIS WAY ATTORNEYS DO NOT HAVE TO WAIT.CHECK WITH ANY ATTORNEY WHO HANDLE THESE MATTERS AND YOU WILL SEE THIS IS THE TRUTH.BUT THIS PAST WEDNESDAY MY STAFF WAS ADVISED WE HAD NO 8:15 MITIGATION DOCKET AND THEY CALLED ME TO SO ADVISE.I ARRIVED AT COURT 8:10 TO FIND NO FEWER THAN 3 ATTORNEYS WAITING WITH NOTICES FOR 8:15.I HANDLED THEIR MATTERS(ONE WAS FOR 10:30)AND CONTINUED ON WITH THE MITIAGTION DOCKET WITHA TTORNEYS COMING AND THEIR CASES BEING CALLED.
WE THEN STARTED A CRIMINAL TRAFFIC TRIAL DOCKET WITH ATTORNEYS AND OFFICERS BEING CALLED FIRST,PROVIDING THEY WERE PRESENT WHEN THAT DOCKET STARTED.CASES WERE RESOLVED BY TRIAL,PLEA OR DISMISSAL.THE SAME HELD TRUE ON THE MISDEMEANOR DOCKET.
I BELIEVE THAT THE UNREPRESENTED DEFENDANT SHOULOD HAVE EQUAL JUSTICE IN THE COURTS AS AN REPRESENTED DEFENDANT.I BELIEVE THE DEFENDANTS AND WITNESSES AND THE PUBLIC HAVE A RIGHT TO BE INFORMED OF THE LAW AND UNDERSTAND PERHAPS WHY CERTAIN ACTION WAS TAKEN.PERHAPS BY EXPLAINING IN LAY TERMS WE WILL HAVE LESS CRIME IN OUR COMMUNITY.PERHAPS WE SHOULD TRY TO MAKE THE MOMENT IN COURT AN EDUCATIONAL AND OR LEARNING EXPERIENCE.MAYBE PEOPLE SHOULOD KNOW THEY MAY LOOSE THEIR DRIVERS LICENSE FOR CERTAIN VIOLATIONS OF THE LAW ETC.BY INFORMING PERHAPS WE WILL FIND OURSELVES HAVING LESS CRIME IN THE COMMUNITY.
PERHAPS YOU WOULD HAVE PREFERRED FOR EXPEDIENCY I ISSUE A WARRANT WHEN THE COURT LACKED JURISDICION ON A UNREPRESENTED DEFENDANT WHO HAD BEEN PLACED ON PROBATION BY ANOTHER JUDGE IN MAY,WITH ME COVERING IN AUGUST AND ADVISING THE STATE THEY HAD NO WARRANT ISSUED AND MUST HAVE ONE PRIOR TO PROBATION TERM EXPIRING;OR PERHAPS I SHOULD HAVE PERMIITED THE STATE TO USE A POLICE OFFICER HAVING NOTHING TO DO WITH THE CASE TO INTRODUCE EVIDENCE IN A TRIAL BECAUSE HIS WITNESSES HAD NOT APPEARED.WELL,THAT IS NOT ME SO IF IT TOOK A FEW ADDITIONAL MOMENTS I COULD NOT HELP IT.
YESTERDAY WAS A DAY I DO NOT WISH TO REMEMBER AND ONE I WILL NOT FORGET.IF YOU WERE ON TIME AND I DID NOT CALL YOU OUT OF TURN I APOLOGIZE.I FURTHER APOLOGIZE FOR MMY DEMEANOR BECAUSE OF THE TOTAL FRUSTRATION I WAS FEELIN.
SHELLY SCHWARTZ

SHELDON SCHWARTZ said...

YES,I FURTHER MUST SAY I NAM SORRY FOR THE SPELLING AND GRAMMAR ETC.BUT THIS WAS POSTED IN HASTE

Anonymous said...

MIDNIGHTMELTDOWN!!

Anonymous said...

Re: JNC applications. When I wrote "will we see the same slate re-apply for the 12th time in a row..." I didn't mean to disparge the ultimate choices. Rather... I meant to highlight the sad/amusing situation which leads particular people to apply over and over and over.

Anonymous said...

shelly schwartz says SO SO SO SO SO SO SORRY

Will the other robed ones follow?........

Anonymous said...

About the 'other robed ones', who do you think should follow with apologies? Has anything else like this happened anywhere else lately?

Anonymous said...

At least Judge shelly Schwartz had the courage to say sorry.That is more than others in the legal profession who make errors do

Anonymous said...

Kind of sad that this blog allows people to anonymously attack nice guys like Shelly Schwartz. I only had a couple of problems with him. Each time, I went and spoke to him. He was more than fair and accomodating. Perhaps if some of you guys who had problems with people actually spoke to them outside of court, you'd see that things could be worked out pretty easily. Just a thought.

Anonymous said...

Linking back to the poll about judges punishing defendants who elect to go to trial, we can say in defense of Shelly Schwartz that he is a judge who doesn't put up with that concept. He has resisted the current trend in traffic and misdemeanor courts to punish those defendants who elect trial at soundings and pretrial conferences, and he's quite vocal about it.

Anonymous said...

Sheldon Schwartz is a bit loud and sometimes talks too much in court, but he's otherwise a much better judge than some of the nice and polite judges that we have in the building.

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Anonymous said...

for those who review this blog,it is suggested we all look at ourselves.yes,judge schwartz was curt with me on more than one occasion.why?i snet a client by himself to court to request a continuance the day of trial;and a second time when i filoed a motion but did not seek a ruling from the court but presumed it would be granted.i will not do such things again although i had managed to do it before.
he wishes and wants the best for allpeople abd thats why he takes the time to explain many things.the public seems to understand his word as do police officer and i have seen this thru my own jaundiced eyes as a fellow attorney.

Anonymous said...

Be on time!Have common courtesy!Be professional!
If you follow these simple rules,the Judge Schwartz is with you.Yes,he talks a lot,but that is because he truly cares about all yhose who come before the Court.Perhaps that area he can work on.But others should also care,be they attorneys or judges.

Anonymous said...

Thursday on the Beach was not a good experience.But it was not because of the judge;but the prosecutors who had no idea what they were doing.Those who were present saw "baby"prosecutors who had no knowledge of what they were doing.One did not even know what jurisdiction is.I sat thru some of this,until my case was called,and yes it was called out of
turn by the judge.
p.h.

Anonymous said...

If Shelly's robes were black, his ties conservative, and his comments short, no one would complain about him.

Anonymous said...

no more about this guy. please!

Anonymous said...

Judge Schwartz(Sheldon)not my favorite judge but gives unrepresented defendants most justice of any judge;victoms learn the system and restitution is made,not merely promised as is often the case.
I was present Thursday.It was not a good day.But we all have bad days.We were laughing when the A.S.A.tried to use an officer from MiamiBeach who had nothing to do with the case to introduce evidence in a trial where a defendant went pro se!Is a judge to laugh or cry for having such prosecutors before him or any other
judge?I for one believe the judge did correctly in explaining to the prosecutor the way he did.Most of us would have made some comments which would have placed us in contempt!
Judge schwartz cool down.Continue to be fair to all even if it take an extra ten minutes for such to be done.

Anonymous said...

We should thank Judge Sheldon Schwartz:he does not just appoint the office of the Public Defender and tells all to get an attorney.

Anonymous said...

What is funny is that Judge Shelly Schwartz gets into trouble for making sure everyone in court understands the law and the reason for the ruling!everyone should understand what is taking place in court.To many people do not understand the law.I would prefer my clients understand the law and the reasoning for th courts ruling,

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