WELCOME TO THE OFFICIAL RICHARD E GERSTEIN JUSTICE BUILDING BLOG. THIS BLOG IS DEDICATED TO JUSTICE BUILDING RUMOR, HUMOR, AND A DISCUSSION ABOUT AND BETWEEN THE JUDGES, LAWYERS AND THE DEDICATED SUPPORT STAFF, CLERKS, COURT REPORTERS, AND CORRECTIONAL OFFICERS WHO LABOR IN THE WORLD OF MIAMI'S CRIMINAL JUSTICE. POST YOUR COMMENTS, OR SEND RUMPOLE A PRIVATE EMAIL AT HOWARDROARK21@GMAIL.COM

Saturday, July 21, 2007

PRESIDENT CHENEY


ITEM: The President will invoke the 25th amendment today and hand off the powers of the Presidency to VP Cheney as the President under goes a colonoscopy today.


As we said in the comment section yesterday, to borrow a line from Woody Allen:


The doctor will do to Bush what he has been doing to the country for the last six years.



VP Cheney's staff has said the VP will be spending a quiet weekend at his Maryland Shores home. They have released the VP's schedule for Saturday.


10:00 am: Become acting president.


10:30 am: Orders marshall law. Suspend Habeus Corpus, sign arrest warrant for Speaker Nancy Pelosi.


11:00 am. Interview with Rush Limbaugh,


11:30 am. Orders the summary execution of all detainees at Guantanamo Bay.


12:00 pm. Light lunch with Donald Rumsfeld.


1:00 pm. Address to the Nation: "We face dangerous times which require strong leadership."

Make the following announcements: Presidential elections suspended until Bin Laden converts to Judaism; accepts "resignations" of Justices Stevens and Ginsberg; accepts Haliburton's "generous offer" to buy the Gulf of Mexico for 100 million dollars and some "really neat" beads;



2:00 pm. Orders summary and immediate execution of all inmates on death row.


3:00 pm. Orders bombing of Iran.


4:00 pm. Signs arrest warrant for Collin Powell.


5:00 pm. Cocktails with Scooter Libby.


6:00 pm. Phone call to President Bush. "All is well, nothing much to report."




12 comments:

IonQ said...

7pm Dinner with the Q

Anonymous said...

Other than the 7:00 pm dinner with the Q, the rest of the day sounds like fun!!

E. Garcia

fake Q said...

Speaking of DUI's, I heard my friend and protoge Jonny No Slope kicked some DUI butt in front of Cristina Miranda this week. Anyone have the scoop?

Anonymous said...

Scott Olsen needs a lawyer

Anonymous said...

University of Marshall law? Is that what you meant? Sounds like Cheney pulled an FDR in your scene.

Anonymous said...

real mature, rump.

Rumpole said...

I plead guilty to the speling eror.

I plead guilty to not being mature with an explanation: when did I ever say this place was about being mature? I like to write and have fun. if you don't like it, log on the Wall Street Journal web site. I'm sure there is nothing funny going on there.

Anonymous said...

Spelling error? Spelling? Marshall v. martial--a spelling error?

Anonymous said...

RumP: Is there ever any middle-of-the-road or balanced humor, or do we have to wait for the Halcyon Days when the Dems are back in office and everything is wonderful, moral, righteous, God-like (excuse the PC blunder), and just plain peachy? This is a great column but sometimes the never-ending flow of pink ink starts to stain the soul. Having said that, it was pretty funny.
Shy Fascist

Anonymous said...

I rather enjoy the Journal during breakfast and later my morning constitutional. I use the NYT to wipe. There's ALWAYS something funny going on in the NYT especially the editorial page.

CK

Anonymous said...

Just wait a cotton pickin Larry Schwartz second....!!! Now that I know what a Golembe is...its over?

Anonymous said...

i heard johnny no slope's buttkicking in miranda's courtroom had nothing to do with slope at all.

something to do with a listermint strip package looking like a baggie of coke to cop. i heard he had the cop actually take a strip and eat it on the stand..brilliant!!