Thursday, January 23, 2020

INVENTION OF THE WHEEL

Unless you're a Republican teacher from Kansas, you know that at some point in our history Humans came down from the trees in Africa and became hunter-gathers. We began to work together, domesticated animals, planted seeds, made weapons from stones, invented the wheel, then Twinkies, and then landed on the Moon. Sometime after that we produced Baywatch and the Pet Rock. 

The oldest indirect evidence of wheeled movement was found in the form of miniature clay wheels north of the Black Sea before 4000 B.C.

But "Stable Genius's" disagree. 
Thus our Stable Genius, the President of the United States, said yesterday in Davalos, Switzerland (Motto: "Bringing billionaires together to brag for many years") the following:

'You know, we have to protect Thomas Edison and we have to protect all of these people that - came up with originally the light bulb and-- the wheel.' 

Now we know the President is all about America first and only America first.  He has no desire to protect foreigners. Inhabitants of the Black Sea be dammed. 

So the only conclusion we have is that...Americans invented the wheel! Hooray!

The light bulb. Tang. Nestle's Quick. The silicon chip. Tinder. Chewy.com. And....THE WHEEL. 

2 comments:

  1. Middle America conservatives perhaps still deserve ridicule for discomfort with evolution, but the day progressives are receptive to the obvious evolutionary truth that genetic populations evolved different traits, which explains social behaviors and outcomes alongside factors like "oppression", or the even more obvious scientific truth that humans, like all other mammals, gestate as two distinct and permanent sexes, is the day I'll find a Scopes-Monkey joke still relevant or biting.

    Liberals are in the fight of their lives to deny elementary science about humanity in the name of a religious idea even more nonsensical than biblical literalism.

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  2. Let's stir it up. When people say, “farce.” to whom or what are they referring?

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