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Saturday, November 07, 2020

ELECTION WEEK DAY FIVE

UPDATE BIDEN BEATS TRUMP Win in Pennsylvania puts Biden over 270. 

 OUR LONG NATIONAL NIGHTMARE IS                                         OVER  


2020 is the year that the US recognized that in the future we will have election weeks, not election days. From 1788 through 1964, presidential votes were hand counted and the results were usually available within the day. As electronic voting and optical scanning systems have come on line, the final votes are taking longer and longer to count. By the 2036 it will take the month of November to determine a winner in the presidential race and by 2052 it will take a year. Technology marches on. 

Here is your election round-up: 

In Nevada, they have scheduled next Thursday between two and four as a good time to resume the count. In Pennsylvania, Allegheny County Officials announced they have found over twenty-two thousand provisional ballots that may swing the election for President Ford over challenger Jimmy Carter.

United States Supreme Court Justice Samuel Alito referred a republican challenge filed early Friday morning to including the votes of California and New York in the electoral college to the entire court for consideration. "We all know how New York and California will vote, so there is no need to count them in the electoral college" the lawsuit maintained. "Without these votes, Joe Biden could not win the presidency, so the vote count in Pennsylvania and Georgia should stop immediately."  Justice Kavanaugh signaled that the reasoning resonated with him "Votes in a Democracy could undermine the principles of federalism and should be treated with a wary eye" the new Justice wrote. 

In the White House,  President Trump tweeted murky pictures of Bigfoot voting in Clark County, Nevada,

Note the Biden Ballot in his left paw/hand
  and the Loch Ness Monster tossing his ballot on the shores of Lake Erie for counting in Michigan. 

The Biden ballot is seen to the very right of the neck of Lochie just at the water line. Other editions of the photo show a joyous Hillary Clinton on the shoreline ready to catch the ballot. 

"More voter fraud!" POTUS tweeted. 

QAnon opened Facebook pages alleging that children in  forced labor in Georgia Pizza restaurants were being forced to fill out thousands of ballots for Biden. Members of the New York Times would then sneak the ballots into voting centers in Atlanta. Vice President Pence urged all Republicans in Georgia to order pizzas "so those poor children will be forced to make pies and cannot vote for Biden." The  Papa Johns servers in Atlanta have since crashed. 

And finally these two nuggets: 1)Florida Governor Ron DeSantis offered to send Florida Poll workers to states still counting ballots: "Florida has a long history in affecting Presidential elections, and we would like to lend our expertise to those states who need a helping hand."   

2) In a programming change, Fox News announced that beginning January 21, 2021, the news channel would air reruns of the General Hospital Soap Opera from 6 am to 11pm, and would break in for news updates if needed. "We are not expecting any news for the next four years" said Tiffany Trump, new head of Fox programming. 


4 comments:

CAPTAIN JUSTICE said...

You’re no better than Joe Biden. Quoting another politician (Gerald Ford in this case). without attribution.

The fat lady has sung. 😂👍👌💪👊

Early prediction for 2024. Harris v Haley.

Phil R said...

I would like to note that out of the darkness the greatest city in America - Pittsburgh, PA gave Biden the votes to give him Pennsylvania and PA gave him the presidency. Pittsburgh, the city where Dr Jonas Salk developed the Polio vaccine, once again saved the country and the world. And this is why the Steelers will also win yet another Super Bowl this year.
Forget red and blue. This country is BLACK AND GOLD!

Anonymous said...


New Bumper Sticker:


PROBLEM SOLVED !!!

Anonymous said...

Okay, Rump.

Please give opening lines for the new U.S. Attorney for the Southern District, since Ariana Fajardo will be fired in seven weeks.

How long until DeSantis appoints her to a circuit judge spot?