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Wednesday, September 06, 2017

IRMA HURRICANE LIST

Update: This is an irreverent post. Please review the preceding post for some sad news about the tragic passing of attorney J.C. Dugue and leave your remembrances there if you wish.  

Courts  remain scheduled (which we pronounce as the King's english dictates, shed/ul/eld )for closure Thursday and Friday(Fed and State, unless you have something scheduled before Judges Martinez or Huck: a little wind and rain never caused them to continue anything). 
August marked the beginning of the employment of new PDs and ASAs. Many of whom are from out of town. This is their first hurricane. Here is our famous storm prep list   ( (c) Justice Building Blog, 2008, all rights reserved) along with some common sense Dos and Don'ts:

DO: go swimming only with a buddy;
DON'T: try and serve subpoenas on Miami Beach Police without a mask, fin and snorkel. To our friends on the Beach: see ya, wouldn't want to be ya

DO: Announce ready for trial today for all cases set for next two weeks.
DON'T:  Take your files home. If the PDs or ASA offices are wacked, you have proof of why you need a continuance. 

DO: Go to Publix at least once and rip a bottle of water out of a kid's hand. Also go to a gas station, wait on line, and then act puzzled at the credit card swipe screen until everyone behind you beeps. These are classic Miami hurricane activities that are a right of passage for new-comers.  
DON'T: Return any gun fire. You may hit an FPL worker hiding in the gas station cafe avoiding work. 

DO: Follow all tips from our Governor, including his directive not to mention "Global Warming" in emails.
DON'T: Evacuate to the Bahamas, or Houston. 

Breaking: POTUS 45 tweets Irma "FAKE NEWS" and blames "Obama/Clinton/Comey/Dems" for path of storm.

Hurricane Supplies: (in order of importance)
1: One Bottle Don Julio 1942 Tequilla
2: Three bottles of any: 2010 Opus One Napa Propriety Blend (in an emergency, the 2008 will do); Lewis Cab 2013, Napa Valley, Sequoia Grove Cabium, 2009, Napa Valley.
3: One gallon of water per person, per day.
5. One bag of organic apples.
6. One box Annie's Organic Granola bars, mixed.
7. One copy of Les Miserables, or The Grapes of Wrath, or 100 Years of Solitude by Gabriel Garcia Marquez, or either of 11/23/63 or IT by Stephen King, both of which are vastly superior to The Stand.
8. Box of candles and matches.
9. Limes (see 1, above).
10. One week supply toilet paper.
11. Battery powered radio. Gen Y'ers and Millennials take note: you cannot listen to radio on your phone when the internet is out. You must watch a you-tube video on the basic principles of operating a radio. You also cannot stock up on ice cream. Just trust us on this one. And Uber Eats, et.al., will not be available for a few days. So get some dry staples in the house. Google cereal and buy some.*
12. Oranges, grapes, pretzels, chips. 

Above all else, unlike POTUS45, use common sense and stay safe. 

Because we know that long-time and careful readers turn here first for the real, non-fake news they need to survive the storm, practice law, and collect a few fees along the way, we will be on the blog all Friday evening and Saturday until (and IF) the storm knocks us off the internet. As we hinted at yesterday, and the reports are indicating today, Irma is s..l..o..w..l..y moving east by north east and that is good news. 

From occupied America and storm threatened Florida, fight the wind and the rain and the power. 



* This is a true fact. General Foods is experiencing a drastic decrease in cereal consumption by people between 10-20. Apparently market research shows that millennials don't like to spend time on cleaning the bowl after eating cereal. 


8 comments:

Anonymous said...

It's 11:42 a.m. Wednesday and there is no announcement from the 17th Judicial Circuit or the Third District Court of Appeal about closing. WTF.

Seth Sklarey said...

If you were here when Hurricane Andrew passed over, you will remember Brian Norcross. Despite being retired, he's still a beacon of hope when the tough times are around the corner. This is the message he posted about an hour ago.
Bryan Norcross added 3 new photos.
1 hr ·
The threat from spectacularly strong HURRICANE IRMA is increasing as the storm strengthens and grows in size. Hurricane Hunters have now measured 175 mph, Category 5 winds. There has so far been no deviation in the track to lessen the threat to the islands in the short run and the eventual threat to some part or perhaps much of Florida.
This does not mean that Irma will necessarily be a Cat 5 when it gets to the vicinity of Florida, but it could be. In any case, Irma is demanding our full attention.
We have confidence that a large powerful hurricane will move near or across the northern Leeward Islands, the Virgin Islands, Puerto Rico, just north of the D.R. and Haiti, through the Bahamas, and then into the waters southeast of the Florida Keys on Saturday. At some point over the weekend, the steering currents are expected to change rather abruptly, causing Irma to slow down and turn to the right in the direction of Florida. Exactly where and when that turn occurs is unknown at this time, but we have confidence that turn will happen.
The best scenario, of course, is that it will happen early in the weekend, and the core of Irma – with likely Cat 4 winds – will stay east of the state and go out to sea. There is also some chance that the mountainous islands in the Caribbean might disrupt the circulation, though no computer forecast shows that happening in a significant way at this time.
On the other hand, many possible tracks bring the worst of a large, powerful hurricane over or near the Keys and up the peninsula over the weekend. The circulation of strong winds is expected to be wide enough that both coasts of the state would be affected, unless that best-case scenario or a track offshore to the east transpires.
Winds too dangerous for putting up shutters or moving boats might start in South Florida as early as Friday evening.
Given the extremely large number of people that would be impacted by any track over the state, early preparation is essential. It will be impossible for everyone who will need supplies to get them at the end of the week.
Attached, once again, is a good shopping list from Brevard County – except that I recommend food and water for AT LEAST SEVEN days and an AM/FM portable radio with plenty of batteries. Also, I suggest only LED flashlights and lanterns with lots of batteries. Though LED lights will last a long time.

Seth Sklarey said...

Here are a few other tips, which I’ll repeat and add to as we get closer:
1. You can order supplies from Amazon today and have them delivered on Thursday at the latest. Local stores might be out of good LED flashlights and lanterns, for example. Have at least one flashlight for every person in your family, and ideally have a lantern or two for general lighting.
2. Take photos today or tomorrow of every room, every piece of electronics, and everything valuable. Upload the pictures to the cloud – Dropbox, Microsoft Cloud, iCloud, Google Drive, etc. – before the storm.
3. Also take photos of key documents and upload them as well. You can do that today.
4. Save your contacts in your phone to the cloud. If you don’t know how to do that, frame grab your screen or have someone take photos of your contacts with their phone and email or text the pictures back to you to a friend. Don’t take a chance on losing your contacts if something happens to your phone.
5. Secure your photographs and albums in double plastic bags.
6. Plastic bags and duct tape are your friends. You can’t buy to many of them. Put documents in gallons-size (or larger) Ziploc bags. Put larger items in double large trash bags cocooned so the opening of the first bag is in the bottom of the second bag. Put some clothes in plastic bags in case you get a roof leak. Duct tape bags closed. Put valuables on a high shelf in a closet.
7. Think now about where you are going to park your car. A parking garage is ideal. Outside in a low-lying area or under a tree is the worst. Think about all of the cars you’ve seen ruined in storms because people made bad choices about where they parked the car before the storm. When we know the storm track, we’ll have a better idea which side of a building will give the best protection. Next to a building on the downwind side gives you the best chance if you have to leave your car outside.
8. Do your laundry and wash your dishes before the storm.
9. You dishwasher is an excellent “safe” in your house if you need someplace to put valuables. Your washer and dryer can offer good protection as well. These could be good places to put your bagged-up photos, for example.

Rumpole said...

Seth I mistakenly removed your third set of tips. Sorry. Mistake old chap.

Anonymous said...

True story today. In gas line. Average time per car- 26 minutes. No reason why other than people felt under pressure, panicked and couldn't operate card swipe and open their gas containers in their car. I did mine in 7 minutes- full tank and 20 gallons of containers.

One old woman looked like the last time she got gas was just before andrew. She - and must be a blog reader- puzzled over the credit card swipe, walked inside- true story- came out with bathroom key, went to the head, came back, struggled with the card swipe again. I approached her and in my bad spanish I either assured her I wasn't going to rob her, or asked her daughter out on a date for cake and beer. In either event, I swiped her card, pumped her gas, and got her on her way. I see some stations have people helping at the pumps and directing lines, and others have that one bored hs dropout sitting inside and stealing lottery tickets. Only in Miami. I was in Oregon recently and they have a state rule that the station must pump your gas. It's like being transported to a time machine back to the 1960's. You can trust your car to the man who wears the star.
Anyway, good job with the post Rump. It made me laugh.

Anonymous said...

Second true story- Florida Orange Juice futures have shot up with the arrival of Irma. Hope the Duke Brothers, Mortimer and Randolph, are on the right side of this trade.

Anonymous said...

For everyone's information, all Miami-dade County circuit and county courts are closed on Monday.

How To Get Help For Hurricane Irma said...

When everything is out of place, why not don't seek help closest to you?