WELCOME TO THE OFFICIAL RICHARD E GERSTEIN JUSTICE BUILDING BLOG. THIS BLOG IS DEDICATED TO JUSTICE BUILDING RUMOR, HUMOR, AND A DISCUSSION ABOUT AND BETWEEN THE JUDGES, LAWYERS AND THE DEDICATED SUPPORT STAFF, CLERKS, COURT REPORTERS, AND CORRECTIONAL OFFICERS WHO LABOR IN THE WORLD OF MIAMI'S CRIMINAL JUSTICE. THIS BLOG HAS BEEN CALLED "THE DEFINITIVE BLOG ON MIAMI CRIMINAL LAW" BY THE NY TIMES, THE WASHINGTON POST, THE POPE, AND DONALD TRUMP WHO ALSO ONCE SAID IT WAS "REALLY GREAT". POST YOUR COMMENTS, OR SEND RUMPOLE A PRIVATE EMAIL AT HOWARDROARK21@GMAIL.COM

Tuesday, May 20, 2014

A BUSINESS DEAL

Everyone has their price, and that includes your humble blogger. 

It is therefore with some regret that we write to inform you that we have entered into a business transaction, which if successfully concluded, (and the odds appear to be very high in that regard) that we will retire and cease our daily struggle of writing this blog. 

As faithful readers you are entitled to some details. 

It appears that in a small country in Western Africa that a woman who is now a widow is in need of assistance. She was at one time married to a high ranking government official. We cannot at this time identify either the country or the name of our client's husband for obvious reasons. 

It further appears that our client's husband placed a very significant sum of money in a bank account for the care and feeding of her and her family. Due to the very shaky political situation in this country our client does not feel secure in obtaining these funds, thus she needs our services. 

Lets us take a moment to reflect on why this woman, so desperate and in need of honest and reliable counsel,  reached out to us. 
As we constantly lecture young lawyers, reputation is everything. And clearly our sterling reputation reached this woman even on the distant shores of the dark continent. Thus she felt secure in requesting our help, and even though without ever meeting us, she is going to arrange for the transfer of well over thirty three million dollars into our account. Our reputation was such that she trusted us. See how that pays off in the end? 

In any event, after some negotiations we have agreed to retain 22.5% as our fee for assisting in this rather complicated and complex transaction, and that dear readers means the final piece of the Rumpole Financial Puzzle is in place and that will see us well into retirement and this life and the next. 

Of course all the details have not yet been finalized and the funds have not been transferred as of yet. But this deal  is something that we foresee concluding sooner rather than later. And once that occurs, it is  hasta la vista  baby. 

Everyone has their price. 

Until then, See You In Court. 

9 comments:

Jan said...

Thanks. I needed that...

DS said...

Sorry, Rumpole. But I have responded to my clients request already. I plan to buy a Bentley w a portion of my Attorneys fees.

Anonymous said...

That is f-ing hilarious

Anonymous said...

Congratulations! What an honor for you to be selected.

Anonymous said...

dark continent? that's racist.

Anonymous said...

I bet Knovack Jones isn't laughing.

Anonymous said...

Does the Florida Bar sell the email list to these scammers? I get those emails everyday too.

Anonymous said...

Who is the attorney going around shaking and slandering judges down? Hint: Judge Thomas and Judge Saenz know him well.

I smell a Florida Bar complaint!

Anonymous said...

Rumpole is it true that Judge T. Thomas had opposition on the last election of 2012 because she made a certain lawyer wait 15 minutes? Please tell me this is not accurate. I researched the comment above and cannot believe what I was told. Anyone? Details.