UPDATE AND BREAKING NEWS:
FEDERAL FRACAS!!!
FDC FIST-A-CUFFS!
BILL "The Brawler" BARZEE
vs.
BENSON "First Punch" WEINTRAUB.
Punches; headlocks. Read all about it on David Markus's Federal Fight Blog.
Rumpole says: You know, we've often thought that there needed to be little more civility and professionalism in Federal Court. Like we have here in the REGJB. And this just proves our point. Perhaps like the Judges North of The Border, it's time for the Federal Lawyers to take a course in sensitivity training.
And now....on with the show.
And now Rumpole knows why.
In a Justice Building Blog Exclusive, we (at great personal expense and some personal risk) bring you the daily work schedule of the Otis Escalator repair crews:
9:45 Arrive at REGJB and look for parking
10:15 Park.
10:20 Arrive at REGJB security line.
10:40 Clear security and enter building.
10:45 Begin work.
11:15 mid morning coffee break.
11: 30 Resume work.
12:15 Lunch Break
1:30 Return to REGJB.
1:40 Clear security and begin work.
2:00 Crew meeting to discuss daily progress.
2:15 Resume work.
2:45 Mid afternoon coffee break.
3:15 Resume work.
3:30 Fill out written reports on work progress.
3:45 Resume work.
4:00 10 minute personal break ( 1 per day. Union Rules).
4:10 Resume work.
4:30 End work for the day.
There you have it folks. Our government contractors in action.
This is 100% true: Alert readers will have noticed that the escalator work crews have put up construction siding that contain this bit of information:
"United Technologies of Otis. First in Safety First in Service..."
(and Rumpole adds)
"Last in speed and efficiency."
Running up and down the stairs is fun. What we can't understand is how the chief judges have missed a golden opportunity: knowing that the escalators will be down, how have they managed not to schedule extra cases? Maybe a combined traffic and felony blitz is just what we need in the heat of the summer to really have some fun.
In any event we have it on good authority that the escalators will be repaired and fully functional by July 7.
July 7, 2009 that is.
See You In Court.
16 comments:
beware the second floor up escalators are now permanently affixed in the third floor hallway. A nice summer suit can easily be ruined by an incidental brush with what used to be the stairs.
And is it me or is that worker who seems to be cleaning the stairs with a toothbrush do a lot of talking to him/her self
WORD OF THE DAY IS FRACAS.
Rumpole's post says is all.
There was a Federal Fracas at FDC.
Wow.
Rumor has it the Gaviria crew and the Moldovan Family are going to join forces on this and pay little Benny Weintraub a visit.
"THE BELLY OF THE BEAST"
Part 1 of a comprehensive look at your SAO Felony Screening Unit. (Inspired by Scott Saul's Editorial post)
The Scene: The lobby of the SAO. Working with the efficiency of a waiting room in a NYC Public hospital. Dirty chairs, pissed off court reporters, small toddlers running for the door, confused support staff and random law enforcement officers checking out confused support staff. All civilians wear those stickers with the name of the ASA they are there to see. There is a portable ATM there. If you dare to use it, you will be charged a $4.50 service and convenience fee. Who gets that fee? I was told some of it goes to Stacey Glick's campaign. However, that has not been confirmed. Another source has told me the fees go to the maintenance and gas for "The Justice in Motion" mini van.
The Players: Felony Screening Unit SAO's. Highly trained attorneys well schooled in the 4th Amendment, deception, and of course, mixed martial arts. Some will tell you that these are the attorney's that have been banished to the bowels of the SAO much like the Land of Broken Toys because they do not favor the litigation and courtroom aspect of the job. Ignore them.
A uniformed City of Miami Ofc. walks into a small office. A FSU attorney swears him in. Lets take a look:
Atty: "Ofc. do swear to tell the truth and nothing but the truth?"
Ofc. "I do"
Atty: "please tell me what happened"
Ofc. "Do you have my A-Form?"
Atty: "Of course... here it is for your review"
Ofc: "O.K.... I was in a marked vehicle and the Defendant, upon seeing me, approached my vehicle and threw what appeared to be a crack pipe to the ground. The Defendant spontaneously stated, ""you got me"". Without losing site of the pipe I retrieved it. It was glass. It broke and it was still hot to the touch. It appeared to be cocaine residue."
Atty: "Anything else"?
Ofc: "during transport the defendant spontaneously stated, ""why you doing me like that? It was just a stem and I smoked it already?"".
Atty: "Great. Thanks for coming in."
Resulting charges: Count 1 - Poss. of Cocaine
Count 2 - Poss. of Drug Paraphernalia.
Count 3 - Tampering with Physical Evidence
Count 4 - Resisting an Ofc. W/O Violence
State Offer: 364 TASC (no ET) or 366.
Stay tuned for part two of this groundbreaking series.
Riddler
Why you censor my comment on the clerk? Word of the day should be censor.
I saw benson yesterday. He had scooby doo monster eyes. Stay away!!!
Don Markus: " So tell me, Rumpoli, who was it. Was it Bensoni or Barzeeni who started the fight? Just dont insult my intelligence."
Rumpoli: " I cannot be sure, Don Markus. They are both small of stature, but my money is on the "mick" Barzeeni, not the jew Bensoni, who is in the drug trade. Let them use the dope, they have no souls".
7:59, it isn't just you.
-Attorney Rejected By The Princess, proud member since 2008
As July 4 approaches, isn't appropriate that or Bill Barzee, just like that small rag-tag group of patriots, faced down a bigger bully and stood up for freedom and justice.
Former judge sues for spot on the bench
Broward County's chief judge is being sued by a former colleague, who wants to return to his post.
http://www.miamiherald.com/467/story/592118.html
Seems as if UTC/OTIS has copied the work schedule of the NYC Subway repair crews!
Rump- remember to invite everyone to the annual REGJB FOAM 4TH OF JULY PARTY- this year to be held at SOBE SUPER CLUB SET.
Hosted, as always by Kenny Weisman and David Peckins, the Foam on the fourth party promises to be loads of fun.
Roy Black and Bennett Brummer will of course sing their famous duet of Billy Joel's song "I am an Innocent Man", while Judges Ed Newman and Amy Dean will assist DJ Esq in spinning the latest hits from Amy Winehouse and 50Cent.
Be there and be foamed. This Fourth Of July, starting around 11PM at SET on South Beach, admission to the private party with your Florida Bar Card.
dude- Last years party was outrageous. I will be there.
THE WORD OF THE DAY IS BROUGHT TO YOU BY SET.
THE HOTEST CLUB ON THE BEACH: SET,
PEREGRINE
Def:Having a tendency to wander.
From Medieval latin, describing the famous bird a "peregrine falcon" or at the time "falco peregrinus" - meaning "pilgrim falcon" the word describes the birds' tendencies to wander and make nests on high inaccessible places.
Use: In his later years while on the bench, the Judge's mind was a bit peregrine.
I saw the OTIS guy asleep at the top of the 4th floor escalator a couple of days ago. He was completely out of it.
Peregrine:
My wife and I went to the Wal-Mart in Tuscaloosa last Friday night, and bought us some of them fancy overalls. She got a pair of blue ones, and I got a peregrine.
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