Saturday, February 01, 2020

DON'T WATCH THE SUPER BOWL

UPDATE: OF COURSE WE GOT THE COIN FLIP CORRECT. WE ALWAYS DO. There is a reason we call it a lock solid bet. 

UPDATE: Not sure how we missed this. Today- 02 02 2020 is the FIRST real palindrome date in 909 years.  Prior date, in case you were wondering was 11 11 1111. (Notable for the last time Miami Dade parking had spots available in lot 26).  
And even more fun, today is the 33rd day of the year with 333 days remaining. 
Next up 12 12 2121 in 101 years. See you then. 

Don't watch the super bowl, See below.
Here it is, our world famous, much anticipated, lock solid Super Bowl bets. The hardest bet is the big one-who will win the game? San Fran is a one point dog. 
The 49ers appeal to us. They are a throw back to the teams of the 60's and 70's- a ferocious defense combined with a tough running game. "Defense wins championships" is the old adage. 

And then we get to the Chiefs and their game changing QB P Mahomes. Unlike other recent Super Bowl QB's, Mahomes and his coach Andy Reid are the real deal. They win games without cheating. 
We want to pick the 49ers. We are rooting for the 49'ers. There is nothing more than we would like to see than a 16-7 game, punctuated by some hard sacks, a few key turnovers, and one game changing play. 

But speed kills, and KC has speed. Boy do they have speed. Knowing we have placed a sizable money line bet on the 49ers plus 120 (betting a 100 on San Fran to win the game outright yields a return of 220- 120 for winning and a return of the 100 bet), our blog pick is KC -1.  

Our big prop bet is 49er OB Garoppolo throwing more than 1.5 TDs, even money. 
Take Tyreek Hill's first catch to be for more than 13.5 yards, -110 for $25 bucks.  
Lets put 10 bucks on the SF Defense to make the first score of the game +2100. That hit would fund more than a few dinners at Per Se and 11 Madison. 
Winner of the 15th Puppy Bowl 🐶: team Fluff- -300.  We have it on good authority Team Ruff's practices have not gone well. The puppies aren't listening and they tend to chase their tails and bark and jump a lot. 

Total Interceptions in the game- over 1.5  +150. We will take that for $50. 
There will be a flea flicker in the game- +260 for $50.00. 
Over/Under 55- Under. 

Just for fun- ten bucks on each
49ers win by 
13-18 points- +1000
19-24 points +1600
25-30 points + 3000
31-36 points +6000

And now for the lock solid, never fail exclusive Rumpole pick of the coin flip. This weather is causing complete havoc with our simulations. The humidity is way off and the barometric pressure keeps fluctuating. It was worse when the game was at the Orange Bowl, with the open end of the stadium receiving an ocean breeze, and Jets flying overhead. 
After careful consideration, we confidently predict that the coin flip will be...…..
TAILS. 

Don't Watch The Super Bowl

It has invaded our national psyche like a tape worm. Yahoos believe we are great because of it; we are good despite of it.  We worship the Super Bowl like a religious idol, bowing down to the former gods who now limp crippled well before they are old by the ferocity of hits they absorbed

So don't watch the super bowl.

There are books to be read; sonnets to be said. Art museums to peruse; bike paths to use. 
Small movie theaters showing black and white art films fifty years old can be found. Go brush a hound.  
Wander down a side street and discover a small café. 
Listen to Bach.  Do some yoga. Bake a cake. Find a yard to rake. 

There is so much more to life than spending hours before a television watching a game that is rarely great. We had the pleasure of seeing the first great and competitive Super Bowl- X, right here in Miami- the second to last time the SB was played in the Orange Bowl. But since that time we have- to use coach Hank Stram's word he made famous in SB IV in 1970(the last time the Chiefs won a SB) -matriculated to more important things. 

We will not be watching the SB tomorrow. We urge you to do the same. Break free. Be a contrarian. Live life. 



30 comments:

  1. Rumpole if you think the Chiefs will win why bet the 49ers?

    ReplyDelete
  2. It's a gambler's decision. The game is essentially a toss up. I am getting more value with the 49ers +120 then the -1. In betting terms we call the +120 "an overlay" because its a better payout then the -1 indicates. The only real way to make money by betting is to find overlays and exploit them.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Welcome to ShumieBowl 2020!!

    ReplyDelete
  4. You got it all wrong mi amigo. Today around 1 pm, after my Peleton class and a brunch with my hot GF I will get in my 911 Targa and head south on Bird Road until I see the Everglades and there, on the side of the road will be a large gator holding a Romeo y Julieta. Ye Olde Cigar Shoppe!! I will walk in, great friends, play several rounds of dominos, sip some very nice old Cuban rum or maybe a 20 year old Scotch I keep in my own locker while enjoying a wonderful cigar. The game will come on. The large paella that has been cooking out back along with a brisket being finished on a Green Egg will be done and I'll have another Cigar and scotch after dinner and enjoy the game with friends. Then I will be off to my condo at South Pointe, another wonderful day in paradise- the super bowl playing a strong supporting role- not a leading role- to my day.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Watch the English Premier League instead. watching games doesn't take all day, no CTE for the players, no endless commercial breaks.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Lets skip the super or shumie bowl and talk about a fav blog off topic -topic- first names you don't see or hear any more!

    Phineas, Rutherford, Mildred, Jane, Quincy, Millard, Chester, Grover,
    Woodrow, Abner, Homer, Mini, Maxine, Myrtle, Floyd, Wilbur, Josiah, Schlomo, Beck,
    Blanche, Hazel, Gretta, Horace (sorry old chap), Wilma, Winifred, Forsyth, Cookie, Romeo, Zeus, Achilles, Socrates, Agatha, Irwin, Erivn, Elderberry, Aloysius, Brophy, Stanislaw,
    Earl.

    Next up?

    ReplyDelete
  7. Rumpy,

    Do you have to use so many colors in your print?

    Why not use appellate font and size rules?

    ReplyDelete
  8. Update on the Easy E- I happened to be in NYC and went to Miami Slice in Manhattan. The slices are muy expensive. 9 Bucks for a spicy sausage crumble with fried tostones and tomatillo sauce with queso fresca. But it was good and in fairness its a double slice like at Casolas in Miami. No sign of Easy E anywhere. The Pizzeria is owned by a corporation- Roadsides, LLC.

    Also on the menu- Medianoche and fried eggplant sandwich; Pan con lechon and pepperoni sub,
    Vegan fried chick'n panini, serrano ham chef salad, and the very popular zuchinni florets rollatini slice (14.95 with a dollop of Ossetra caviar- but again a double slice).

    ReplyDelete
  9. 16-7? If so, I think it would be the first time in SB history that a game was decided by the same score as a previous game.

    ReplyDelete
  10. On the Klobuchar website the easy E is listed as a precinct captain in Sioux City, Iowa, working the caucuses.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Over/ Under in Super Bowl 54 is 54. When has that happened before?

    ReplyDelete
  12. Real Fake Surgeon GeneralSunday, February 02, 2020 12:54:00 PM

    Let me see if I understand this correctly. We have a world wide outbreak of a highly contagious and somewhat deadly virus. Miami has visitors from all over the world. Therefore we have spent a week in Miami co-mingling with people from all over the country and all over the world culminating in close to 80,000 of them congregating in a small stadium.

    Does anybody else see a problem with this?

    ReplyDelete
  13. Superbowls 44, 48, and 52 for starters.

    ReplyDelete
  14. From the 2044 archives on the Great Virus Reset as history calls it:

    The real problem, which nobody knew at the time, but it seems obvious in retrospect was the 2020 super bowl in Miami. Over 300,000 people swarmed into a city that already was populated by people from all over the world. In a small restaurant on south beach serving Asian take out was a cook who had recently illegally immigrated from Venezuela. Just before leaving Venezuela for Miami Lorenzo as he is known, shared a room in Caracas with 32 illegal Chinese immigrants. It was from them he got the virus. During super bowl week Lorenzo worked six days on double shifts, preparing over 4300 meals. Individuals who ate infected meals were from all 48 contiguous states in the US, Portugal, Japan, Russia, Germany, South Africa, and Australia. Eleven people who ate at the restaurant boarded a cruise ship after the super bowl for a 60 days cruise and visited most of the countries in Scandinavia, Europe, and Africa. Within 45 days after the Super Bowl in Miami, over thirteen million people were infected. Two months later most of the world's economy collapsed. Farming and transportation stopped. Most health care providers died in the second and then third more virulent strain that emerged. it took over nine years for the virus to burn itself out. By that time 45% of the earth's population had died. People in Alaska, New Zealand, the Philippines, and Switzerland formed the most organized remnants of society that formed the basis of the rebuilding of the earth's population and society. Alaska became the capital of the New Earth and most nations sent representatives to the Parliament that was formed in Vancouver. Alaska still kept strict travel bans in place for another six years.

    ReplyDelete
  15. 52 Street. You’re drunk. SB 44 Saints Colts the number was 56.5. The other two were also not on the number of the game. Take Rumpole’s advice and go read a book today.

    ReplyDelete
  16. EVER FREAKING YEAR RUMPOLE GETS THE COIN FLIP RIGHT.
    Every year!!

    How does he do it?

    ReplyDelete
  17. Well if you look at a prior post you would see that we use a sophisticated computer model we designed that takes into account a variety of factors including the design of the coin, the health, age and arm used of the individual flipping the coin; the barometric pressure, the dew point and drag coefficient, temperature, and several other proprietary factors. In this case our model was a bit wonky with the first 100,000 sims coming in tails at 84% and we need a plus 95% to make an accurate call. The problem we had was the rain and temperature and some indecision as to who was flipping the coin. Left handed versus right handed makes all the difference in the world. Eventually by Friday night every 100,000 sims which takes about 22 minutes was coming up tails in the mid 90 percentile. And we went with it.

    ReplyDelete
  18. Garappolo just threw a TD pass. Earlier in the week Rumpole said to lock in the prop bet he throws more than 1.5 TD passes. He threw one. I put down 3500 even money. Next TD and I am a winner winner chicken dinner.

    ReplyDelete
  19. The coin flipped is taped DUH and Rumpe gets a peak at the tape which is why he can predict it every year.
    And now you know the rest of the story.
    Paul Harvey……..GOOD DAY!

    ReplyDelete
  20. This game is playing right into San Fran and Shanahan's hands. Relatively low scoring defensive battle with San Fran running it hard.

    ReplyDelete
  21. Very weak offensive PI on that deep san fran pass.
    Just sayin the refs are eatin KC BBQ

    ReplyDelete
  22. OMG this halftime show. Vince Lombardi and Tom Landry are rolling over in their graves. How low has American culture sank? Who is this this...space alien in some gray outfit looking like he stepped off the set of The Day The Earth Stood Still? Klatu, Gort Barrata Nictu the super bowl show!!!

    What ever happened to good safe American entertainment like Up With People??

    ReplyDelete
  23. Post Malone announced as surprise performer for the REN a Post Superbowl Venue after party. Marketing genius.

    ReplyDelete
  24. Halftime rocked....Shakira gets the win by a touchdown, but jlo was not bad. Miami is also a clear winner with the sweet weather that the fans and games were graced with. Proud of my city.

    ReplyDelete
  25. Worst half time show ever.
    San Fran files protest of game based on disputed Chiefs TD- new angles definitively show he was OUT Of BOUNDS before ball crossed goal line And the incredible fake offensive pass interference call on San Fran at end of first half. NFL should do quick review and bring them back to play it again next week.

    ReplyDelete
  26. Game- 4 out of ten
    Half time show- 1 out of ten.

    and if I never hear Troy Aikman's voice again it will be too soon. Can he be any worse.
    "This is a big third down for KC... This is a big series for the 49ers..." He freaking opened a can of woop-ass old slogans and couldn't stop saying the same old tripe. Get Chris Mad Dog Russo in the booth or Mike Babcheck.

    ReplyDelete
  27. Commercials were awful this year. Right after halftime, I hit the DVR, ran some errands for 30 minutes, came back and watched the rest of the game commercial free.

    Man, network TV has given up.

    ReplyDelete
  28. Trump, were you not around for the Palindrome Celebration on January 31, 1310 (01311310)?

    ReplyDelete