Sunday, December 13, 2015

NFL 2015 FURTHER EVIDENCE OF THE DECLINE OF CIVILIZATION EDITION

Our colleague Roy Black often starts his Facebook posts bemoaning further evidence of the decline of Western Civilization. Usually it is a new idea from Donald Trump: banning cabbage (causes flatulence),  registering people who download Timothy Leary books or Beowulf (weirdos) , outlawing Newark, New Jersey (have you been there? A wasteland).  Today it was something different.

Mr. Black was concerned that the obituary of a successful doctor, surgeon and medical researcher contained, at the end, a request that donations be made to a particular football scholarship at the University of Pittsburgh. Black found this troubling. 

We respond.

First, people from Pittsburgh are different. They talk funny, "youins" and eat weird things (french fries smashed into sandwiches) and they have a fierce civic pride that is expressed in their support for their sport teams.

Second, our admiration for sports figures knows neither bounds, nor is grounded in reason. Many sports heroes don't deserve our support. 

Joe Jackson betrayed his sport-baseball. Babe Ruth was a drunken glutton. Ty Cobb a racist. Pete Rose bet on the games he managed. 

OJ Simpson beat his wife, and then killed her. Rae Carruth killed his pregnant girlfriend. Adrian Peterson beat his young son with a weapon and stuffed leaves and dirt into his mouth to stop him from screaming. Ben Roethlisberger was accused of raping two different women on two different occasions. Both Peterson and Roethlisberger will play today, their fans cheering their athletic exploits. 

The fact is that beyond the citizens of United States, the citizens  Canada, Mexico, Central and South America, Europe, Africa and Asia worship their soccer (football) teams and athletes, although many of the athletes, in their personal life, are not worthy of worship. Many are ignorant thugs. 

Who is more important to the planet- a striker, a goalie, a quarterback, a home-run hitter, or the group of scientists that will invent the machine to remove carbon emissions from the atmosphere and cool the planet? Who gets more money and admiration?

Sports at their best remind us of our own accomplishments in youth. The day we hit one out. The coach who brought the best out in us and taught us we can do more than we ever imagined. The team of underdogs that came together and beat the favorite. The 69 Mets. The 1980 US Hockey Team. Persistence and perseverance when all seems lost- any Cubs team in the last 100 years. Perfection- the 1972 Dolphins. 

Sports has a place. Today's Washington Post has a story on the young Marco Rubio, and the solace he found in the Dolphins as a young boy and teenager when his world collapsed when his older's sister's husband was arrested in a notorious Miami drug trafficking case. Mr. Black will remember the case: he represented the ringleader Mario Tabraue in one of the first big federal cocaine cowboy prosecutions. 

Any teacher is worth more to society than any power forward or guard. But no teacher earns what Dwayne Wade makes. Any ER doctor saves more lives in a week than a starting pitcher does in a lifetime. Any assistant public defender struggling under a staggering caseload helps more people than Justin Beiber (another Black client), yet no PD will earn in a lifetime of public service what Bieber earns in a year. 

Mr. Black's concern is hardly startling new news. It has always been this way, and probably always will. The Bill Gates and the Steve Jobs of the world will get their due for changing the world and will become wealthy beyond all means. So will the wall street trader who decodes the scam of bundled mortgages and sells the market short. Jobs and Gates changed the world. The trader made billions for himself and his company. 

And so it goes. 

The Washington Post breathlessly reported today that North Korea's all girl band Moranbong left China in a hurried huff, hours before a concert was scheduled to begin a goodwill tour. 

The performers of Moranbong were personally chosen by Kim Jong Un himself. 

More evidence of the decline of Eastern Civilization. 
Mr. Black can rest comfortably, knowing it's not just Western Civilization in peril.

See You In Court tomorrow. 

Oh... our picks for today:

Cheaters -3 in Houston. Enough is enough. 

Green Bay - 5 over Cowpokes. Ditto. 

Tennessee +6 over J....E....T...S... Jets Jets Jets. 

Giants over Fins, pick em, Monday Night. 

Russia -29 over Turkey. A "Gulf Of Tonkin" just occurred between a Russian destroyer and a Turkish vessel. Putin is spoiling for a fight and knows Obama won't intercede. 




40 comments:

  1. This comment section just went apeshit over Scalia asking some questions about whether Affirmative Action policies actually do benefit their intended beneficiaries.

    Mr. Black, in his facebook post, suggests that we isolate the top 1% in IQ among small children and lavish benefits and scholarships on them (in place, presumably, of the athletic scholarships he bemoans). Does he have any idea of what IQ distribution looks like among self-identified racial groups and ethnicities? Can you imagine the OUTCRY if such a policy were taken seriously? And the legitimate injustice that would result?

    Those scholarships and benefits for the 1% would nearly *exclusively* go to young Jewish Americans and Asian Americans and to a lesser extent non-Jewish white Americans, with hardly any Hispanic or African American representation. It's a cartoonishly stupid idea that would result in enormous losses for minorities.

    Its results would be demonstrably more "Racist" than anything Trump or Scalia have ever proposed. But let me guess, there will be no outcry from lawyers in this comment section who idolize Black and demonize Scalia. There will be no cries for Black to "publicly apologize". On the contrary, everyone will try to buddy up to him at the next FACDL event at which he speaks.

    Or, they will just attack me for suggesting that IQ distribution is as the data says it is, sadly. Or they will say "IQ" is suspect itself, but that was Black's term, not mine.

    If Trump said we ought to use IQ as a determiner for immigration, I imagine there would be similar outcry. But Black gets a pass, it seems.

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  2. Kenny and Colby, the biggest fans of Moranbong, flew all the way to China for the concert. Now what? Bummer.

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  3. Where In the World Are Kenny and Colby?Sunday, December 13, 2015 11:14:00 AM

    I heard they were heading to Burundi but the State Department just issued a travel warning.

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  4. I don't think Black gets a pass. There was no specific policy put forward by anyone who has the ability to implement policy. It was just a riposte that people with a high IQ should be cultivated in the way we cultivate college sports. Billions of dollars go into college sports. Not nearly a tenth of that go into public education for exceptional children. Do we want a nation of lumbering lummoxes who excel in a forty yard dash, or a nation of smart people who can solve the unprecedented crises the world is facing?

    And I do not think there is any scientific proof to your assertions that high IQ is skewed among the population and under represent african americans and hipanics. There is no reason to believe that IQ among racial populations would not be distributed among a bell curve like almost every other distribution of natural assets (distribution of the intelligence of the judiciary notwithstanding).

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  5. Where In the World Are Kenny and Colby?Sunday, December 13, 2015 11:40:00 AM

    They're heading to eat at Arpege in Paris. Kenny represented Alain Passard on a DWLS and reckless in Miami, so he doesn't have to wait for a table.

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  6. That's because they don't have the sense or juice to eat at Renomme.
    Dopes.

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  7. Miami lawyer Andrew Gerson, who does a lot of criminal defense, has been arrested for bringing a loaded gun into the Magic Kingdom at Disney World. His concealed firearms permit expired ten years ago. Needs a good lawyer on this one.

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  8. They're heading to Corfu to re-examine the facts in the famous Corfu Channel case.

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  9. I invite Kenny San and Colby San to my humble restaurant in Koyoto: Kikunoi. I would be my distinct pleasure to serve them dinner. There are not many good establishments serving food in Corfu in my humble opinion. They would enjoy the food and service here.

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  10. Maybe their heading to Orlando to represent Gerson.

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  11. Kikunoi. Three Michelin stars. Not that you idiots would know that.

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  12. They jetted off to Cabo to spend the holidays with Bieber and the Khardashians. That's where all the cool people spend the holidays.

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  13. First a quick stopover for dinner at Chefs Table at Brooklyn Fare. The only Michelin three star joint in the 718.

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  14. Chefs Table way overrated. Only got a third star because no one else in Brooklyn had one. Yawn.

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  15. Yeah like you're eating at Per Se every week.

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  16. Sports just gives people a reason to over eat. "Buy me some peanuts and crackerjacks..."
    Watch NFL today. Loaded with Pizza and beer and fast food ads.

    I got up at five had three scrambled egg whites and ran a fiveK, came home, stretched, ate four ounces of grilled salmon and ran three miles to my yoga studio then did a 90 minute bikram yoga session and then ran home. Ate five almonds and a small plain yogurt container and half a banana. What did you do today?

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  17. I had Hokkaido sea urchin with black truffle and toasted brioche, and Ossetra caviar with crispy potato and dashi sabayon last time I ate at Chefs Table.

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  18. Man she turns me on, all hot and sweaty all the time. I envision long blonde hair in a pony tail and maybe a throwback 80's headband.

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  19. who the F is eating at Renomme? It's in Latvia for goodness sakes!

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  20. You know there is a really quality restaurant in town here, a venue as it were, that does fantastic coconut fried shrimp in healthy coconut oil. They also serve an amazing Keys Sea Urchin with yellow tail slices cured in truffle oil with toasted jalapeno bits. The food is really good and fresh and locally sourced.

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  21. I had Hammo (daggertooth Pike Conger) Sayori (halfbeak fish) and Funzaushi that's made with Nigorobuna fish that can only be found in Lake Biwa, Shiga Prefecture at Per Se two weeks ago. My girlfriend and I spent 2800 with tip for an amazing dinner. Granted the Sake was 500/bottle and we had two, but then I was on a 100K retainer for a new case in the southern district so what the heck?
    BTW I recommend the upgraded suite at the Millennium. 8 bills a night but comes with free champagne and caviar and breakfast and we got a lincoln town car every day for a 100 because the hotel gets you a discount and that helps. Also near SDNY. Nice getting out of a town car in front of the courthouse every day.

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  22. Both NobleDen and The Broome are better hotels, You're a mook tourist getting ripped to impress your GF.

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  23. Rump- the Bengals steeler game is for all purposes over- steelers up by 20 with a minute- and yet with the Eagles and Bills tied they won't break away from the Steeler Bengals game until it ends. Why? Why hang on with a game that is over?

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  24. Was AG the babe you took with you to NYC? Because I want pictures.

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  25. There once was a time when young attorneys, both men and women, were concerned with doing what they could to make things better in our society. Altruism was not a fad, but a way of life. That has all changed. Now the young ones think it is cool to boast about how much money they spent for imaginary meals at imaginary restaurants. Truly sad and an indictment of who law schools, these days, are admitting to their institutions. Most of the posters to this Blog are pathetic representatives of our once noble profession. As the Honorable Phillip Hubbart once said, "We work hard, we play hard". So having fun is noble and worthy of pursuit. But having and spending lots of money, just exposes the writer as being shallow and a douchebag. And to answer Angry Girl's question about what I did today, one of my many lady friends came over, whereupon she demonstrated some new contortionist exercises and then performed skillful fellatio on yours truly. We are soon to go out to a very reasonably priced Chinese restaurant where I will order shrimp and lobster sauce. Just an average but wonderful day in the life of 'Secret Judge'.

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  26. I love following the Fake Kenny W and Fake Judge Jon Colby restaurant reviews.

    I was disappointed in their meek rating of L'Bernardin. I loved it. They said their flounder was flaky and dry.

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  27. Thank you for your excellent annotation to my inconsiderate rant. I must confess you make an excellent point. How could finding a cure for AIDS come close to playing for a superb college football team like Pitt? And I bet men like him, as they slowly fade into alzheimers, incontinence and arthritis, fondly recall those glorious days leading future coal miners on to the frozen tundra (yes I stole that quote from NFL films). While this is not apparent today, I actually attended college on an athletic scholarship for swimming. I am sure those many hours monotonously lapping the pool increased my ability to listen to my tedious fellow professionals in court. We must be thankful that our revered universities have taken their rightful place as the minor leagues for the NFL. Go Dolphins.

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  28. I found the anonymous post critical of my suggestion of giving scholarships to the top students aged 4 and 5 as somehow being racist thought provoking. Perhaps it might be argued that just suggesting it is racist because minority student don’t have the intelligence of whites and would not be included is racist but lets put that aside. A similar question arose during oral argument in Fisher v. University of Texas II, by Chief Justice John Roberts:
    CHIEF JUSTICE ROBERTS: What unique perspective does a minority student bring to a physics class?
    The case involved using race as an admission requirement and Roberts was suggesting that diversity and race had nothing to add to grasping the science of physics. It seems to me selecting students on the basis of their ability in math, physics and chemistry is non-racist and perfectly fair (albeit at 4 and 5 perhaps the subjects are more elementary). Would your anonymous poster suggest that giving athletic scholarships to the tallest, fastest and most muscular students is racist?

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  29. Boo Secret Judge

    Yay Fake Judge Moreno

    Yay Fake Kenny W and Fake Judge Colby!

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  30. zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

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  31. Can I just say who really cares what Roy Black puts on Facebook? He's just a criminal defense lawyer not a philosopher.

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  32. Does Mr. Black really believe that "top students" can be identified at the age of 4? I'd like to see the science on that.

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  33. Andrew Gerson's LinkedIn profile implies he's some kind of judge. Is that true?

    "Active member of the Florida Judiciary. Mr. Gerson has practiced law in every forum within Florida including all Criminal Courts in Dade, Broward and Palm Beach Counties as well as the Southern District of Florida Courts, quasi judicial functions and past appearanes in Immigration Courts as it relates to Criminal law througout the State of Florida."

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  34. "Do we want a nation of lumbering lummoxes who excel in a forty yard dash, or a nation of smart people who can solve the unprecedented crises the world is facing?"

    No. But . . .

    The professionalism of sport means that we no longer play sports for the player, but, for the spectators. We should not have thousands of students watching 200 hundred play football, we should have thousands of students paying football, rugby, tennis, baseball, running track, swimming, ect., One should not be able to graduate from high school unless you are on a sports team. It is as important as math.

    K,

    P.S. Sprinters don't lumber.

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  35. Possibly the biggest waste of time since I began reading this Blog was reading your post, and reading these comments.

    Please put something new up. Fast.

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  36. Black is the King of the humblebrag. Well done sir.

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  37. This will be my last post on the topic, because I understand the way it comes across. But to both Mr. Rumpole and Mr. Black, yes IQ distributions among Americans follow fairly predictable bell curves based on "race". That data is a google away, if youre interested.

    Of course, IQ tests themselves are imperfect. And the idea of "race" is more complicated than we give it credit. And even if IQ were a perfect measure of what we call "intelligence" and everyone were categorically assigned a race, important questions still remain as how such data is even meaningful. But it's there. Jewish Americans score highest, then Asians, then non-Jewish whites, then Hispanics, then African Americans.

    It certainly is disheartening to see, however, that the "IQ gap" has not been lessened over the decades of trying. Again, the data is out there, unpopular but clear.

    My larger point was not to focus on that, but only to say that many things -- when taken out of context and in a spirit of polemic -- can seem racist. But because Scalia, or that GOP candidate whose name doesnt merit yet another repeat, is seen as one's ideological enemy and Mr. Black is seen as being on one's team, the benefit of the doubt is given.

    Id like to see more such benefit of the doubt be given across the aisle. That's all. I will now stop harassing the Professor when he posts. But we could all do with a little less partisanship.

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  38. Mr. Black may be correct that we make to much of star athletes and big time college sports. That being said, I will bet that the amount of money spent of gifted programs in public schools and scholarships and generous financial aid at universities across the country is greater than the value of the scholarships and benefits bestowed on college football and basketball players. And the athletic departments at big time top tier programs have revenues in excess of a 100 million a year, often leaving money for their universities and its academic endeavors. Oh, and guess what subsidizes the brainy swimmer's scholarship? And the women's soccer team that did not even exist before Title IX? You guess right. The football and basket balls teams which generate $$$$$ for the entire athletic department from the licensing deals, ticket sales and TV money etc.... I get the idea that the money around college athletics can make us wonder about our society's values but the financial picture is not so clear cut. I agree we can and should put more money into developing the talent that may cure cancer or aids but I am not buying it is because we spend to much on sports. There are many college athletes who we have never heard of and will never win a Heisman trophy who go onto do excellent things with their lives and for their communities in large part because of the educations they received while on scholarship.

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