Good Super Bowl Sunday. In this post we will handle some preliminary matters.
As all good MAGA Americans with a GED know, the Super Bowl is a right enshrined in the Bible and Constitution.
"There shall be unto you this day of rest when all work shall stop and you shall watch two enemies battle over an unclean skin" Recriminations, I:14; and "Congress shall make no law infringing on a day of rest, within 40 days of the new year, on Sunday, when a contest all Americans may watch with food." US CONST, Art VIII, §4.
Rumpole's Game Day Chili: People have offered large sums for our secret chili recipe. We provide it here, free of charge. There is a secret ingredient, which if you follow our instructions exactly you cannot help but make great chili. Now we prefer chili without beans (Texas style) but you can use canned black beans. And we use ground turkey, sometimes mixed with ground pork as our protein, but ground beef works just fine. And we roast a half a dozen tomatillos in our air fryer on roast, 400 degrees, 11-12 minutes, drizzling oil and salt on them before roasting before starting anything else.
But here is the secret ingredient you MUST use. Ready? Drum roll please.......FLOUR!
Now, as Bruce Springsteen sings in Tenth Avenue Freeze Out, in concert, as he gets to the line "The change was made uptown and the big man joined the band" he first says (or sometimes yells) THIS HERE IS THE IMPORTANT PART!:
Take a cup of flour per pound of protein and place in a cast iron skillet and cook on medium to high heat until the flour browns. You need it to turn brown. That's the secret. Then set aside. Put your protein into the skillet and sauté until cooked. Add the spices you like, including half of the roasted tomatillos, a can of cut up tomatoes with the liquid, onions, garlic, and pepper. Cook until the tomatoes break down and are incorporated into the meat. You can also add a small can of tomato paste.
Begin to incorporate your browned flour a few large spoonfuls at a time into the meat mix, adding chicken broth (you can use beef broth, but we like chicken broth) into the pan until you have what appears to be a smooth paste. If you are adding canned beans, add them now with the liquid. Cook until the liquid is mostly absorbed. When that is done, add another cup of broth, add the rest of the flour, turn to low heat, cover and check every 15 minutes and keep adding broth until it is fully incorporated and you like the mixture. Add some more roasted tomatillos and tomato chunks, cook for a few more minutes until they are incorporated, and turn off heat and enjoy.
OUR PROP BETS. Listed in order of best to far flung.
Sea George Holani over 1.5 receptions. -125. He's Darnold's go to back for passes out of the backfield.
Sea Sam Darnold over 1.5 TDs. -175. This is Darnold's fourth team. He's been through the wringer. He has a chip on his shoulder. He is going to throw the rock.
Sea Sam Darnold over 235 passing yards + over 1.5 passing TDs. +149. See above.
Sea Jaxon Smith-Njigba 2Td receptions. +500. Yes, NE is going to double team him. Ask him if he cares.
NE Drake Maye under 38.5 yards rushing + Rhamonde Stevenson under 50.5 rushing yards. +232. Defense wins championships.
That's it for now. We will have our game predications up before the game. As to the rock solid, almost never lose coin flip bet, we have had some issues. The constant movement of the seismic plates in San Francisco is an issue, which also affects the earth's magnetic core in that area. The prevalence of wind gusts that are hard to predict, along with a difficult to measure dew point, and some concerning chatter about the shoulder of the coin tosser, have set our algorithms all over the place. Currently our computer simulations are running nearly 50-50 after ten million runs, with the small and slightest edge to heads, depending on the temperature at the time of the flip. We are monitoring this closely. Spend your money on Darnold going off today, which gives you an insight into who will win the game.
