tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19039943.post6368329462266830022..comments2024-03-28T23:00:25.050-04:00Comments on THE BLOG: THE EMPIRE STRIKES BACKRumpolehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08380575650255695462noreply@blogger.comBlogger26125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19039943.post-70466545184160315752007-07-22T08:46:00.000-04:002007-07-22T08:46:00.000-04:00“ Anonymous: Please. T...“<I REL="cquote"> Anonymous: Please. Those stories have been circulating for years. Get some new ones. </I>”<BR/><BR/>Old and mostly false. See <A HREF="http://www.snopes.com/horrors/freakish/darwin05.asp" REL="nofollow">here</A>.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19039943.post-40775781366067064382007-07-21T20:33:00.000-04:002007-07-21T20:33:00.000-04:00Please. Those stories have been circulating for y...Please. Those stories have been circulating for years. Get some new ones.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19039943.post-66617236950425745602007-07-21T13:36:00.000-04:002007-07-21T13:36:00.000-04:00i'm still laughing my ass off. That's a pretty goo...i'm still laughing my ass off. That's a pretty good way to start my saturday, laughing my ass off from the dumb-ass criminals. thank you, whoever u are. that was priceless.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19039943.post-13064031415377743342007-07-21T09:39:00.000-04:002007-07-21T09:39:00.000-04:00OUCH! Oh, wait, that feels pretty good...can you g...OUCH! Oh, wait, that feels pretty good...can you go a little deeper?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19039943.post-47053950823228919392007-07-21T08:50:00.000-04:002007-07-21T08:50:00.000-04:00Be the Fi-manfear the Fi-manBe the Fi-man<BR/><BR/>fear the Fi-manAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19039943.post-50617518747593648412007-07-21T08:49:00.000-04:002007-07-21T08:49:00.000-04:00Is Lurvey the Q?Fear the LIs Lurvey the Q?<BR/><BR/>Fear the LAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19039943.post-14094020164184397762007-07-21T00:20:00.000-04:002007-07-21T00:20:00.000-04:00Yes, it's again that magical time of the year when...Yes, it's again that magical time of the year when the top ten "Juan D'Arce Dunb Ass of the year Awards" are bestowed, honoring the least evolved among us.<BR/><BR/>Here is the glorious Winner:<BR/><BR/>1. When his 38 - caliber revolver failed to fire at his intended victim during a hold-up in Long Beach, California , would-be robber James Elliot did something that can only inspire wonder. He peered down the barrel and tried the trigger again.<BR/>This time it worked.<BR/><BR/> And now, the Honorable Mentions:<BR/><BR/>2. The chef at a hotel in Switzerland lost a finger in a meat-cutting machine and submitted a claim to his insurance company. The company expecting negligence sent out one of its men to have a look for himself. He tried the machine and he also lost a finger. The chef's claim was approved.<BR/><BR/>3. A man who shoveled snow for an hour to clear a space for his car during a blizzard in Chicago returned with his vehicle to find a woman had taken the space...understandably, he shot her.<BR/><BR/>4. After stopping for drinks at an illegal bar, a Zimbabwean bus driver found that the 20 mental patients he was supposed to be transporting from Harare to Bulawayo had escaped. Not wanting to admit his incompetence, the driver went to a nearby bus stop and offered everyone waiting there a free ride. He then delivered the passengers to the mental hospital, telling the staff that the patients were very excitable and prone to bizarre fantasies. The deception wasn't discovered for 3 days.<BR/><BR/>5. An American teenager was in the hospital recovering from serious head wounds received from an oncoming train. When asked how he received the injuries, the lad told police that he was simply trying to see how close he could get his head to a moving train before he was hit.<BR/><BR/>6. A man walked into a Louisiana Circle-K, put a $20 bill on the counter, and asked for change. When the clerk opened the cash drawer, the man pulled a gun and asked for all the cash in the register, which the clerk promptly provided. The man took the cash from the clerk and fled, leaving the $20 bill on the counter. The total amount of cash he got from the drawer: $15. (If someone points a gun at you and gives you money, is a crime committed?)<BR/><BR/>7. Seems an Arkansas guy wanted some beer pretty badly. He decided that he'd just throw a cinder block through a liquor store window, grab some booze, and run. So he lifted the cinder block and heaved it over his head at the window. The cinder block bounced back and hit the would-be thief on the head, knocking him unconscious. The liquor store window was made of Plexiglas. The whole event was caught on videotape.<BR/><BR/>8. As a female shopper exited a New York convenience store, a man grabbed her purse and ran. The clerk called 911 immediately, and the woman was able to give them a detailed description of the snatcher. Within minutes, the police apprehended the purse snatcher. They put him in the car and drove back to the store. The thief was then taken out of the car and told to stand there for a positive ID. To which he replied, 'Yes, officer, that's her. That's the lady I stole the purse from.'<BR/><BR/>9. The Ann Arbor News crime column reported that a man walked into a Burger King in Ypsilanti , Michigan , at 5 a.m. , flashed a gun, and demanded cash. The clerk turned him down because he said he couldn't open the cash register without a food order. When the man ordered onion rings, the clerk said they weren't available for breakfast. The man, frustrated, walked away.<BR/><BR/>***** THE 5-STAR Juan D' Arce STUPIDITY AWARD WINNER*****<BR/><BR/>10. When a man attempted to siphon gasoline from a motor home parked on a Seattle street, he got much more than he bargained for. Police arrived at the scene to find a very sick man curled up next to a motor home near spilled sewage. A police spokesman said that the man admitted to trying to steal gasoline and plugged his siphon hose into the motor home's sewage tank by mistake. The owner of the vehicle declined to press charges, saying that it was the best laugh he'd ever had.<BR/><BR/>In the interest of bettering human kind please share these with your friends and family... unless of course one of these 10 individuals by chance is a distant relative or long lost friend. In that case be glad they are distant and hope they remain lost.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19039943.post-2189121515999276082007-07-20T20:15:00.000-04:002007-07-20T20:15:00.000-04:00Ladies and Gentlemen your next Dade PD: William Je...Ladies and Gentlemen your next Dade PD: William Jefferson Barzee<BR/><BR/>and your next Dade State Attorney: Daniel Quinton Lurvey.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19039943.post-7502407491799097502007-07-20T20:14:00.000-04:002007-07-20T20:14:00.000-04:00what did the cops do?what did the cops do?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19039943.post-20492289227357292812007-07-20T19:46:00.000-04:002007-07-20T19:46:00.000-04:00Not that you deserve an answer wise guy, but I wil...Not that you deserve an answer wise guy, but I will give you one anyway.<BR/><BR/>Grossman's last line was a cheap shot. In the vernacular of one who tries cases before a jury, it was one question too many. <BR/><BR/>Juries don't mind seeing a liar exposed. They do get upset when you kick someone when they are down. There is a way to win with class. Grossman doesn't have it.<BR/><BR/>As to the cops sentenced today- it is always a tragedy to see a professional's life destroyed. But these men need to be punished. It is a sad day all around.Rumpolehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08380575650255695462noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19039943.post-37934968841612264502007-07-20T19:35:00.000-04:002007-07-20T19:35:00.000-04:00Yeah. Good point Rump. What was Grossman thinkin...Yeah. Good point Rump. What was Grossman thinking when he pointed out that Williams quit before. Totally unfair to defend yourself by attacking the accuser. I'm sure you argue that all of the time in court. Oh. Wait. Whoops.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19039943.post-4299560904265383222007-07-20T19:25:00.000-04:002007-07-20T19:25:00.000-04:00Any thoughts on the Hollywood cops who were senten...Any thoughts on the Hollywood cops who were sentenced to 14 and 9 years in prison today? I bet they also have divorce papers on the way.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19039943.post-72857187068706369672007-07-20T19:14:00.000-04:002007-07-20T19:14:00.000-04:00Who let Vicks dog loose?Who let Vicks dog loose?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19039943.post-79388641544554902252007-07-20T18:19:00.000-04:002007-07-20T18:19:00.000-04:00The Gentleman Jack was very smooth. Double filtere...The Gentleman Jack was very smooth. Double filtered according to the bottle. <BR/><BR/>No boating plans. Way too hot. The boat will stay in dry dock until September. Paint the bottom. Tune up the diesels. Get it Bristol Fashion. <BR/><BR/>Ahoy Mate.Rumpolehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08380575650255695462noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19039943.post-60060078395054819542007-07-20T18:15:00.001-04:002007-07-20T18:15:00.001-04:00Didn't the "retired Judge" once date the Q's siste...Didn't the "retired Judge" once date the Q's sister?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19039943.post-8744780833120580512007-07-20T18:15:00.000-04:002007-07-20T18:15:00.000-04:00Rumpy, how was that Gentleman Jack the other night...Rumpy, how was that Gentleman Jack the other night?<BR/><BR/>Any boating plans this weekend?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19039943.post-76945307835746489212007-07-20T18:05:00.000-04:002007-07-20T18:05:00.000-04:00Know the Q. Query the Q. Queer the Q? Quienin...Know the Q. Query the Q. Queer the Q? Quienine the Q!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19039943.post-6047318126984634022007-07-20T17:40:00.000-04:002007-07-20T17:40:00.000-04:00ROUTINE: President Bush will have a colonoscopy Sa...ROUTINE: President Bush will have a colonoscopy Saturday and temporarily hand presidential powers to Vice President Dick Cheney.<BR/><BR/>THE PROCEDURE: Bush will be under the effects of anesthesia, and Cheney will be acting president until Bush is prepared to reassume his authority.<BR/><BR/>PATIENT HISTORY: Two polyps were discovered during Bush examinations in 1998 and 1999. His last colorectal cancer check was in 2002.<BR/><BR/>Copyright 2007 The Associated Press. <BR/><BR/>TO STEAL A LINE FROM WOODY ALLEN<BR/>Now this doctor is going to do to Bush what he has been doing to the country for the last six and a half years.Rumpolehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08380575650255695462noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19039943.post-4783008069636654052007-07-20T17:33:00.000-04:002007-07-20T17:33:00.000-04:00QQAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19039943.post-8101146596716206752007-07-20T16:09:00.000-04:002007-07-20T16:09:00.000-04:00Dude, If I see the Q, I'm gonna smack the Q. I hat...Dude, If I see the Q, I'm gonna smack the Q. <BR/>I hate the Q.<BR/><BR/>I despise the Q.<BR/><BR/>No Q for me.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19039943.post-11670708999859696122007-07-20T16:07:00.000-04:002007-07-20T16:07:00.000-04:00SOMEBODY CALL THE Q!!!!Lindsay Lohan turned hersel...SOMEBODY CALL THE Q!!!!<BR/><BR/><BR/>Lindsay Lohan turned herself in to face charges of driving under the influence in connection with the Memorial Day weekend hit-and-run crash that sent her into rehab.<BR/><BR/>Accompanied by her attorney, the 21-year-old actress surrendered at the Beverly Hills Police Department Thursday afternoon to be fingerprinted and photographed, Officer Brian Ballieweg said.<BR/><BR/>Lohan's blood-alcohol level at the time of the crash was above California's 0.08 percent legal limit, Ballieweg said. He wouldn't disclose how high it was. She is also faces a misdemeanor charge of hit and run, he said.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19039943.post-33337500777728571232007-07-20T13:16:00.000-04:002007-07-20T13:16:00.000-04:00What is the whole world watching?What is the whole world watching?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19039943.post-67700287371521850222007-07-20T12:24:00.000-04:002007-07-20T12:24:00.000-04:00What say the bloggers about Lurvey's new metro hai...What say the bloggers about Lurvey's new metro hairstyle?<BR/><BR/>Fi-ManAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19039943.post-71694031593933201792007-07-20T12:20:00.000-04:002007-07-20T12:20:00.000-04:00Are you people for real? comparing animals to lit...Are you people for real? comparing animals to little children now, are we? get real. animals and just that. ANIMALS. NOT HUMAN BEINGS. For you dog lovers out there, don't get your panties in an uproar. Those were Pitbulls. I'm sure that none of you in Dade County has one. It's illegal for a reason. they're dangerous and menacing to the real LITTLE CHILDREN. Betting on dog fights is illegal, I'll give you that. But don't we bet on dog races all the time and even bring our LITTLE CHILDREN to enjoy the dogs being pushed to their limits. Take a Valium, or a Xanax, or a muscle relaxer. ANYTHING. that's not a subject to be concerned about. move on, folks. there are real LITTLE CHILDREN out there being killed and molested. <BR/>xoxoxo.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19039943.post-89553606525874973462007-07-20T11:20:00.000-04:002007-07-20T11:20:00.000-04:00As a trained medical doctor I can tell you first h...As a trained medical doctor I can tell you first hand what steroids can do to a judge. The aggressive personality traits displayed at the courthouse means only one thing...hint: ask Barry Bonds if he knows what I am talking about.<BR/>Judges and steroids...a dangerous mix indeed.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com